Page 13 of Love on Ice (Love in Terengia #5)

13

OUT OF TIME

Sebastian

Loud children's laughter wakes me from a deep sleep. Where am I?

It takes me a moment to get my bearings. With each lazy blink, I take in elegant, dark wooden furniture and various shades of beige.

Ah, yes. Toronto! The hotel where even the Queen liked to visit.

My first reaction is to stroke Michael’s dark hair, which has become even more tousled overnight. Over the past week, it's become clear that his favorite sleeping position is with his head on my chest, right above my heart. Even thinking about it makes mine flip.

Does it mean that he wants to get as close to me as he can — even at night? Or is he just a cuddler? Like so many other questions in the last ten days, I haven’t got the guts to ask.

A snapshot of Michael mid-thrust last night takes center stage in my mind's eye. It was absolutely explosive, but it wasn't just sex. It was more. So much more!

Afterwards, the mood was ... almost reverent. We didn't speak. Michael cleaned us up enough so that we wouldn't wake up glued to each other in the morning, then he lay back down on top of me. We spent what felt like hours lying there, exploring every inch of each other's bodies that we could reach with our fingertips until we fell asleep at some point.

Even in sleep, neither of us moved from each other’s arms. Why should we? It’s absolutely perfect!

More loud noises from the hallway float into our cozy room. This time it seems to be the parents of the noisy kids urging them to be quieter — at an ironically deafening volume.

My gaze falls on the red digits of the clock under the TV. Oh shit! It's already 9:20 a.m. We have to leave the room by 10:00 a.m. And we still have to repack all the gear we swiped off the bed last night. Even the leftovers from our picnic are still on the floor.

Michael lifts his head and grins broadly at me, and my heart melts. He’s so adorable! Then he lowers his head again and rubs his nose over my nipple. It feels amazing, but we so don't have time for that!

I have to force myself to push Michael's head away. He looks at me totally bemused, and I detect a hint of hurt in his gaze.

"We have to check out in forty minutes," I explain.

Clear relief washes over his face. Does he really think his touch would ever be unwelcome?

"Weren't you in charge of the alarm clock?" Michael quips.

"Someone distracted me," I reply with raised eyebrows .

Michael laughs and reluctantly stands up. I immediately miss his closeness, but he's right, of course. We have to get ready.

My gaze wanders covetously over the naked body in front of me as Michael stretches and yawns loudly — he’s so sexy.

"Come on, you lazy bum!" he signs.

Although my gaze doesn’t seem to leave him cold. His morning glory twitches under my scrutiny.

Michael

The morning is unbelievably stressful. Sebastian and I take turns in the bathroom to avoid temptation. If we’d showered together, we would never have gotten out of our room in time.

It’s such a waste! If morning sex is on offer, I accept on principle. And morning sex with Sebastian is a double or triple yes. The way he looked when I stood in front of the bed and had a bit of a stretch ... Hmm ...

A smile crosses my face as I stare at the croissant in front of me. How we made it to breakfast without stopping for a quickie, I’ll never know.

A jostle at my elbow brings me back to the little café we’re in. When I look up, Seb asks, "What are you thinking about?"

"Something we didn't have time for," I reply simply.

The flash in Sebastian's eyes tells me that he’s understood me completely. Although the very next moment, a cloud passes over his face.

We really need to talk.

Now!

Before I can lift my hands a waiter has moved over to our table and started an animated conversation with Sebastian. I haven't the slightest idea what about. I look around the room. I’m both bored and feel like I'm sitting on hot coals at the same time. Just when I’ve finally decided to talk to Sebastian …

When the guy leaves our table, Sebastian turns to me.

"So, here's the plan for today ..."

Did you schedule time for a proper talk? I ask silently.

"First a quick trip to the CN Tower," Seb says. He mentioned wanting to see the view from the high TV tower at the beginning of our trip, but we were ... um ... too tired for that.

"Then a quick walk over to the Hockey Hall of Fame."

I look at him in surprise. We've already been to the museum twice, and although our flight doesn't leave until the evening, if we go in there ...

"We're just going to the store," Sebastian says firmly. "Don't think I didn't notice a few more things you had your eye on."

He is so thoughtful!

"And we still need to buy some souvenirs for our parents and your brother," he says looking at me reproachfully.

"Well, chop, chop!" he announces, jumping up from his chair full of enthusiasm.

I hesitate. I really want to go up the CN Tower too. For Sebastian. And we really should get some souvenirs, but we could do that at the airport. It hasn't escaped me that my best friend has a jam-packed schedule for the last day. One that doesn't leave us a catch for a breather. Not a single minute to talk.

But he's so excited that I don't have the heart to ask for a change of plans .

Maybe he doesn’t think there’s anything to talk about, anyway? the little voice in my head whispers.

My heart sinks.

It’s with that depressing thought that I get up from the table and follow the guy who’s already eager to leave.

Sebastian

I look down at the fields spread out below as the plane approaches Vienna. In a few minutes we’ll be home. Although, I’m not overly happy about it.

Of course, I’m sad the vacation is over — it was absolutely glorious — but that’s not all. I can't shake the thought that I messed up the most important thing of all.

At the beginning of the vacation, I was afraid that talking about how I felt would spoil everything. Frankly, I was just overjoyed to have Michael in my bed. It was like a dream come true, and I didn't want to risk that. The longer the vacation went on, though, it became obvious that we needed to talk. If it was just a vacay trip to the wild side for Michael, I’ll have to deal with it somehow, but I can’t live with the uncertainty anymore.

At the beginning of our trip, I had the excuse of avoiding the awkwardness of the rest of the holiday if it didn’t go my way. That argument no longer holds water. The truth is I haven’t had the courage to have this conversation. The last night we were together would have been the perfect time, but after the explosive sex, there was this very special mood between us ...

I thought we’d still have time for the conversation in the morning, but then we overslept, and then the day flew by. I admit that this was partly my fault. My plans for our last day were way too ambitious, but I really wanted to get the most out of our vacation for Michael’s sake. So, the day became one big hustle. We even had to bust a gut to get to the airport in time — not at all my style normally. Or Michael’s for that matter. Maybe neither of us wanted the vacation to end.

When we finally sat in our plane seats, Michael fell asleep immediately. He even slept through the meal. Not that I blame him. We’ve been on the road so much, experienced so much, and done so much, we were dog-tired.

I can't sleep, though. I haven't been able to get any rest for the whole nine-hour flight. I’ve spent the entire time wrestling with the feeling I’ve missed my big chance.

Michael

A wild shaking wakes me.

What's going on?

Are we there yet?

Damn! Why do I always sleep so well on airplanes? When I lay my head against the headrest just to catch my breath after the long day, I never expected to doze off. And certainly not to sleep through the entire flight. I had other plans. I wanted to have the talk with Sebastian. About us two. About what's going to happen when we're back home.

It’s an outside chance that this was anything more than a little vacation flirtation for Sebastian, but I needed to try. Immediately falling asleep was far from ideal. I was exhausted after our exciting vacation, but still. If only I had fallen asleep half an hour later. I mentally roll my eyes at myself.

That can't be helped now. I need a plan. How do I get Sebastian to talk? It's hardly convenient here at the airport. And I have no idea how we’re getting home from the airport. Sebastian didn't mention anything about that and I didn't think to ask him. My brother hates driving, and we came to the airport in a cab, so maybe ...

I could work with that. I'll ask to go to my apartment first and then invite Sebastian up for a thank-you drink. He’s never turned down an invitation before. So that might work. Hopefully, he's not too tired or wants to go straight home with all the luggage.

I start to panic. I’m not ready to let him go just yet.

Take a deep breath! I mentally coach myself.

If that plan doesn't work, I can always show up at his apartment under some other pretext. For now, I’ll stick to plan A and do everything I can to make it work. Having made that decision, I feel a little better right away.

Waiting for our luggage takes forever, and at the same time goes much too quickly. Sebastian and I hardly say a word to each other. For me, it was because I'm nervous about my plan, and Seb looks a little green about the gills. Did he not sleep on the plane? Or is he not feeling too good?

As we step through the final gates into the main terminal, Sebastian suddenly stops. I stop too, almost bumping into him. He’s staring off into the hall. If he was pale before, he looks like he’s seen a ghost now.

I follow his gaze.

There is Annabelle — my ex-girlfriend.

What is she doing here?

She hurries towards us, her light brown curls bouncing with every step she takes. She has a baby in her arms.

A baby?

"Hi, Daddy!" she signs with one hand while her eyes are fixed on mine.