Page 43 of Learning Curves

Michelle lay with one hand splayed across Audrey’s stomach, feeling the gentle rise and fall of her breaths.

It was just past eight, and they’d been in bed since supper, satiating their seemingly endless need for each other.

Michelle still couldn’t believe what they’d done in her office earlier.

She was not the type of person to engage in office sex, and yet . ..

Yes, she’d sanitized her desk before she left for the day, but she had no regrets. She wasn’t sure if she’d ever felt sexier than she did with Audrey kneeling between her thighs, gazing up at Michelle as if she was every one of her fantasies brought to life.

“When do you fly to the UK?” Audrey asked, rolling to face her.

“Hmm?”

“For Christmas? You’re flying home to see your parents, right? Or did you decide not to go?”

“No, I’m going, but not until the twenty-third, and I’ll be back on the twenty-seventh. I’m spending the day after Christmas with Kate and her family.” Three days with her own family would be more than enough. “And you? How long will you be in Massachusetts?”

Audrey shrugged, one hand playing gently in Michelle’s hair. “I haven’t made definitive plans since I’m just driving down. I’ll be back before the new year, though. Maybe we can spend some time together?”

“As long as it doesn’t involve a New Year’s Eve party. After my parents’ various holiday gatherings, I’ll be finished socializing until the start of the spring semester.” She cringed internally, hoping her antisocial tendencies wouldn’t put Audrey off.

But Audrey was gazing at her with an adoring expression. “I would love nothing more than to ring in the new year right here in your bed.”

“Really? You wouldn’t rather be at a party?”

“I go to New Year’s Eve parties sometimes but usually just a small get together with friends to watch the ball drop.

I definitely enjoy socializing more than you do, but I’m not a party animal, and I’d love to spend more time together over the break.

It could be a great chance for us to get to know each other better outside of work. ”

“I’d like that. Other than my trip to the UK, I have no plans.

” It had only been a week since they first slept together.

That night, they’d decided to keep their relationship casual to start, but already, it felt a lot more serious than Michelle had expected.

In fact, she suddenly realized she’d made a significant oversight.

She’d inadvertently kept something important from Audrey.

Michelle sat up, hugging her knees to her chest. “There’s something you should know. ”

“What is it?” Audrey sat up too. “You look serious. Is everything okay?”

“Yes.” Michelle shook her head. “Actually, no. I don’t know. Let’s put some clothes on, and I’ll start the kettle for tea.” Because right now she felt entirely too naked, both physically and emotionally.

Audrey put a hand on Michelle’s knee. “You’re freaking me out. Give me a hint?”

“Oh, yes, sorry. It’s work related.”

Audrey visibly relaxed. “Okay. Let’s have some tea, and you can tell me what’s on your mind.”

“All right.” Michelle felt ridiculously pleased as Audrey opened her duffel bag and took out lounge pants and a long-sleeved top.

She loved that Audrey had planned ahead and brought some things with her.

It spoke to how quickly their relationship was progressing.

This didn’t feel casual, not that she was complaining.

Michelle got up and slipped into comfortable clothes of her own, then went into the bathroom, surprised to find Muse curled up on the bath mat.

“What are you doing in here?” she murmured to the cat, who watched her out of slitted eyes.

Probably, Muse was annoyed with her for having Audrey in her bed.

Lately, Muse had been occupying that space, taking over the side of the bed where Kelly used to sleep.

Michelle never understood what was going through Muse’s mind. The cat remained a mystery, but her disdain for Michelle was clear enough as she immediately got up and scratched at the bathroom door, unhappy about having been closed in with her.

After freshening up, Michelle opened the bathroom door, rolling her eyes as Muse darted out, racing through the bedroom and into the hall beyond.

So dramatic. Audrey went into the bathroom next, so Michelle went downstairs and started her kettle.

She set a box of tea bags on the kitchen table so Audrey could select whatever blend she preferred.

Michelle opted for lavender-chamomile since it was so late in the evening, although it was unlikely she’d have trouble sleeping after all the energy she and Audrey had burned together. She’d just sat at the table when Audrey entered the kitchen.

“So, what’s this big work-related thing you wanted to talk to me about?” Audrey asked as she sat in the chair opposite Michelle, selecting raspberry tea for herself.

“It’s not big, at least not yet ... but it might become big.” Michelle looked down at her tea, then back at Audrey. “You must know I haven’t been happy at Northshire for a while.”

Audrey’s brow furrowed. “I guess I did.”

“I used to love my job more than anything in the world.” Michelle lifted the string on her tea bag and gave it a stir, watching as the amber color swirled through the water. “When you first met me, back when you were a student ... that was a good time in my life.”

“I noticed you seemed happier then,” Audrey said quietly.

“I was, but that was a long time ago. Lately, well ... I see you in front of a classroom, and I know you’re the future of the department.

You’ve got so much energy and passion, and your students are responding to it.

That’s not the case for me anymore, and so, I think it might be time for me to move on, to leave NU. ”

Audrey stared at her with wide, questioning eyes. “Where would you go?”

“That’s the question, isn’t it?” Michelle gave her tea another stir. “I’ve applied for a few positions back in the UK.”

“Oh shit.” Audrey’s mouth actually gaped. “When you said you might be moving on, you meant that in a really big way.”

“Not necessarily. I applied for those positions before we were together, and even then, it was more of a pipe dream than something I really expected to happen. I’m not even sure I want to move back to the UK.

I’m not sure about anything, except that I’m not happy in my current job.

These last few months, watching you thrive at work, I felt like it was a sign for me to move on.

Now that you’re sharing my bed, it feels like .

.. something else. I don’t have any job offers on the table.

I might be at Northshire for years yet. I just wanted you to know where my head has been.

I feel that my time at Northshire is reaching an end, but I can’t say when—or if—I’ll leave, or where I’ll go if I do. ”

“That’s a lot to take in.” Audrey reached for her hand and gave it a squeeze. “But I appreciate your honesty. I didn’t know you were that unhappy here.”

“Oh, please. You’ve seen how I am at work, and you’ve heard what they say about me.

I’m not naive. I know I’m the scapegoat for everything that’s wrong with our department.

And all you have to do is check that god-awful ‘rate my teacher’ website to know what my students think of me.

” Michelle exhaled roughly. “I may come across as if it doesn’t bother me, but I don’t want to spend the rest of my life at a job where almost everyone dislikes me. ”

“And you shouldn’t have to. If you’re that unhappy, you should absolutely look for a new job. Maybe even a new career? Have you considered publishing your book instead of looking for another university position?”

“I have, and I wish that was a realistic goal, but I haven’t even finished writing it yet, and the research I’ve done indicates I’m unlikely to earn a living writing historical fiction novels anytime soon.

I’ll need a new day job before I can quit this one.

Or maybe ...” She paused to gather her thoughts before she said more than she’d intended.

But then again, she and Audrey had promised to be open with each other.

“Maybe I’ll find new joy at NU with you in my life.

Nothing is certain. I just wanted you to know there’s a possibility I’ll be leaving. ”

“I get that.” Audrey paused, fidgeting with her mug. “It just hurts to think I might lose you so soon after we started dating.”

It hurt Michelle to think of losing Audrey too. That had never been her intention. “I know it’s too soon for us to talk about our future, but if I get a job offer somewhere else, I’d like to have that conversation with you then.”

Audrey blinked at her. “Really?”

“Yes, unless you see us as something short term?” Because Audrey looked so surprised that Michelle had mentioned their future, and she didn’t like the way that made her feel.

“No, I don’t.” Audrey pressed her lips together. “I just assumed ... well, I’ve always prioritized career opportunities over relationships, and the people I’ve dated in the past have too. You’re different, Michelle. In so many ways. Good ways.”

“I don’t make relationship decisions—or any major life decisions—lightly,” Michelle said.

“It was fairly monumental for me to decide that there might be another chapter to my professional life, a chapter after NU. No one would ever call me impulsive, so whatever happens next for me, if you and I are still together, I would very much like to talk about it with you and factor our relationship into my decision.”