Page 39 of Lady Farah Creates a Scandal (The Season of Secrets #2)

“That’s a tad unfair. Lord Ware is a fine man. He’d never lie to you.”

Farah picked up a towel and stood to exit the tub. “That’s why I know he doesn’t love me. He told me he doesn’t.”

“Did he?”

She hesitated. “Well, not in exact words, but he told me he didn’t want a wife because his first love was travel. Marriage to him would be lonely. Is sitting at home waiting for a husband who is hardly ever home any better than sitting alone but having my heart free to find someone else?”

“I suppose it isn’t.”

Just then, a little girl came barreling into the dressing room and skidded to a halt. “Farah’s here, too,” Ava-Marie called as she flung herself into Courtney’s arms. “Farah! Are you playing hide and seek? Everyone’s looking for you!”

Farah exchanged a worried glance with Courtney before smiling down at Ava-Marie. “Something like that, sweetheart.”

Ava-Marie clapped her hands, dancing on the spot. “I want to play too.”

Lauren popped her head in the door and gasped as she saw Farah standing there. She held out her hand to Ava-Marie. “Come, Ava. Let’s find some of Lady Courtney’s dolls and let Farah get dressed. I think we ladies need to have a chat.”

“Can we play hide and seek once Farah is dressed?” the little girl asked.

Farah smiled at her. “If you play quietly with the dolls while the ladies talk, we’ll play hide and seek before you go home.”

“Auntie Lauren gave me my doll. It’s at home with Daid, but I suppose I can play with your dolls too.” With that, Ava-Marie happily let Lauren guide her out of the dressing room.

Courtney shrugged at Farah’s exasperated sigh. “I forgot they were coming to visit this morning. My maid will help you dress, and I’ll order some food. Come to my sitting room when you’re ready.”

A half hour later, Lauren raised an eyebrow as Farah joined the ladies in the sitting room off Courtney’s bedchamber. “So this is where you’ve been hiding. Rockwell and your brother are frantic.”

“I know,” Farah sighed as she took a seat. “But I needed some time to think.”

As Ava-Marie continued to play on the floor with Courtney’s childhood dolls, the women discussed Farah’s situation in hushed tones.

“You can’t stay here forever,” Lauren pointed out. “Rockwell will find you. He’s like a man possessed.”

Courtney nodded in agreement. “Maybe you could stay with your aunt in the country?”

Farah shook her head. “Blackstone would look there first. I was thinking of going to Bath, actually.”

“Who do you know in Bath?” Courtney asked.

“No one. But a Mrs. James lives in Bath and she is selling a cottage near Clevedon on the coast. The staff she employs at the cottage wishes to stay. A maid, a cook and a groom. It’s well within my budget.”

The two other women shared a look. Lauren said, “But you’ll need a lawyer to ensure everything is in order.”

Farah nodded. “Mrs. James has recommended one.”

Another concerned look was shared. “You can’t trust a woman you don’t know.” Lauren shook her head and added, “This is all so rushed. I don’t think you are thinking clearly. What would Tiffany say?”

“I was hoping she would go with me and then we can assess Mrs. James and her offer.”

“But that is unfair. Asking her to help you puts her in a terrible position. Rockwell is her brother-in-law,” Courtney exclaimed.

“Besides, Tiffany would tell Wolf and he would get involved,” Lauren added.

“Well, I didn’t say my plan was perfect, but if you have a better idea on how I can live my life out from under my brother’s control and not end up married to a man I don’t want, then by all means let me know.”

This outburst of Farah’s was greeted by silence.

Finally, Courtney spoke up. “Perhaps it would solve a lot of problems if you simply married Lucien.”

Lauren gasped while Farah’s mouth dropped open.

Lauren turned to Courtney. “You don’t mean that. You can’t mean that. He’s your Lucien.”

Courtney shrugged. “The man who returned from Ireland is not my Lucien, and the way things are going, he never will be.”

“But he could be,” Lauren insisted.

“I’m not sure he even wants to try,” Courtney whispered.

“While that is a very kind offer, Courtney, I don’t want to marry Lucien. He’s not in love with me either. And you, of all people, having experienced love… How can you recommend marrying without it?”

“I told you why. Being alone for the rest of my life is something I know I no longer want.”

Lauren looked confused. “Did I miss something?”

Courtney tuned to her and said, “Before I knew Lucien had been found, I was considering marriage. In fact, I had thought about Mr. Axton Fancot, Valora’s brother.”

“But what about Lucien?” Lauren spluttered. “He’s home, and he needs a wife.”

“But does he want me and are we still suited? He is not exactly clamoring to woo me back. While I accept I can marry for respect and friendship, I can’t marry your brother while I love him and he doesn’t love me. That would be torture.”

Lauren sat back, biting her lip, looking like the world was ending. Farah understood her need to see Lucien settled not just financially with a good marriage but settled back into society. Farah was sure she’d counted on Courtney being the key to everything.

“I’m not going to discount Lucien immediately, but I won’t sit around and be embarrassed or ignored for long.”

“That’s fair,” Farah said and hugged her friend.

“My brother is just confused and struggling with all that has happened to him.” A wobble entered Lauren’s voice. “I just want him to find happiness after all that has happened, and I think he can find that with you.”

“I hope so, too,” Courtney replied.

Ava-Marie interrupted their conversation, tugging on Farah’s skirts. “Can I play hide and seek, too? I’m good at hiding!”

“I know you are,” Farah said, laughing. “All right, why don’t I go hide and you all have to find me?”

“I bet I find you before my auntie. But Lady Courtney knows this house best.”

She tapped Ava-Marie’s nose. “Then the ladies will give you a head start. Once I’ve hidden, Ava-Marie gets a lead of twenty counts. How is that?”

“That’s fair,” the little girl said, nodding.

Farah knew she could only hide in these two rooms, or Courtney’s father or brother might see her. She moved quietly and hid in one of Courtney’s armoires pushing her gowns aside.

It took Ava-Marie only fifteen minutes to find her. “You didn’t hide very well. I would have gone up to the attics. I almost started there. I’ll teach you one day at my Daid’s house. I’ll tell him how I found you so quickly.”

The women shared a look of concern before Courtney knelt to Ava-Marie’s level. “Sweetie, this is a special game. You can’t tell anyone that Lady Farah is here, okay? It’s a secret.”

Ava-Marie’s eyes widened with excitement at being entrusted with a secret. “Are you hiding from someone?”

“Yes. I’m playing a game with Lord Ware. An important game that I must win. Will you help me by keeping my secret?”

She nodded solemnly, though the women weren’t entirely convinced she understood the gravity of the situation.

As Lauren prepared to leave with Ava-Marie, Farah hugged the little girl goodbye. “Remember, not a word to anyone,” she whispered.

*

Later that evening, as Lucien tucked Ava-Marie into bed, she looked up at him with bright eyes. “Papa, I know where Farah is hiding. If I tell you, will I win the game?”

Lucien’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “What game, sweetheart? Where is Farah?”

Ava-Marie seemed to hesitate, as if she knew she wasn’t supposed to tell him. But the temptation to win was too strong. “She’s at Lady Courtney’s house. Did I win?”

Lucien’s mind raced with this new information. He kissed Ava-Marie’s forehead, his voice soft. “Yes, darling. You won the game. Now, time for sleep.”

As he closed the door to her room, Lucien debated what to do with this newfound knowledge. Should he tell Rockwell, or keep Farah’s secret?

At least she hadn’t run off on her own and the worry eating at his stomach eased. He felt responsible for Farah’s situation and if anything happened to her… Well, he carried some of the blame.

He understood what Rockwell would be going through, not knowing where she was. He’d be going out of his mind with worry. As would Blackstone.

He summoned a servant and sent a missive for Lord Ware. He thought Rockwell would likely be at Wolf’s house. He would let Rockwell know first, to give him time to go and talk some sense into Farah. Then in a few hours, he’d have to send the same note to Blackstone.

Once his task was completed, he sat in his study wanting time to himself.

He loved his two sisters even though he couldn’t remember them.

Lauren and Madeline fussed over him and he knew Lauren was desperate for him to marry and help the family’s financial situation.

He also knew Lauren expected him to marry Courtney.

Everyone expected him to marry Courtney.

She did, too.

He wasn’t opposed to that idea. She was a beautiful, intelligent, and obviously a loyal woman. But was that fair to her? He was not the same man she’d loved, and he wouldn’t hold her to an obligation just because they were to be married before.

Maybe he could find something more than a marriage of convenience with her, but it would mean letting Courtney get close.

And his heart just wasn’t ready. Ava filled his mind, his soul, and his heart.

He didn’t know if he loved her, or hated her, or probably a bit of both.

Until he could get some clarity, he didn’t know how to let anyone else in.

But he didn’t have time to wait for his heart to heal. Farah would be the perfect choice as his wife, because he liked her. He knew her better than any other woman, and he admired her. But her heart belonged to Rockwell. Could he marry her knowing that?

Lucien sat back in his chair and closed his eyes. Maybe a marriage of convenience with a woman who didn’t have any expectations of him, who didn’t know him from before he lost his memory, would be better.

But then a picture of Courtney’s face when she’d seen him alive and well swam into his mind. The love shining in her eyes, the joy, the happiness… Oh, to have a woman look at him like that again was intoxicating.

He’d shared his life with Ava and loved her and it had been wonderful even as a poor country peasant. Could he do a marriage without love? His heart clenched in his chest at that idea.

No. He selfishly wanted it all.