Page 21 of Lady Farah Creates a Scandal (The Season of Secrets #2)

A s the Doreen barely moved through the waves of the Irish Sea, Farah found herself drawn to the deck, the salty air filling her senses.

Rockwell, his commanding presence near the helm, oversaw the ship with practiced ease, his eyes occasionally flickering towards her, and she wished she understood what he was thinking.

He’d been very clear on his views last night and so had she.

She stood watching him interact with the captain and his sailors.

Rockwell belonged on this ship. Farah could see that.

It was as if a sailor’s life was in his blood.

She understood that now. Having never seen him on board a ship before this trip, she hadn’t realized what she was asking him to give up.

She stood gazing out to sea. Lost in thought, she felt a warm presence beside her.

Lord Furoe approached, his daughter trailing behind him.

“The sea is quite captivating, is it not, especially when it’s so calm?

” he remarked, his gaze lingering on her face.

“It may be a longer journey home than expected with the wind so light.”

“You must be impatient to get home. We have barely made it across the Irish Sea.”

Just then, Rockwell joined them. “I think we should dock at Holyhead. The weather is going to be calm for several days, so the captain says, and I concur. It means a trip overland, but I still feel we’ll get to London sooner.”

“How long will it take?” Lucien asked.

“Roughly five days.”

Farah sighed. “The same time it would take to sail if we had wind.”

Rockwell turned to his friend. “You decide. We can continue to sit becalmed with a growing number of ships or we can dock at Holyhead and go overland.”

“What do you think, Lady Farah?” Lucien asked.

She smiled up at him. It was so nice of him to include her. “It would be more comfortable on the ship. Ava-Marie could run around. But selfishly, I want to get home as soon as I can. The longer I’m out of circulation, the more questions might be asked, and Lord Franklin is a determined man.”

“Who’s Lord Franklin?” Lucien asked.

Rockwell looked at her and then said, “It’s a long story. I’ll tell you over a coffee, after I tell the captain to change course. Then I’ll tell you how Farah came to be on my ship.”

Farah crouched down to tickle Ava-Marie under her chin. “And you and I can play a little game.”

The little girl giggled. “Can we play hide and seek like I used to do in the graveyard?”

“What a good idea. Shall we ask Caitria to play with us?”

“Oh, yes. Come on.” Ava-Marie held her hand out.

As Farah took the tiny, outstretched hand, a pain stabbed deep in her stomach.

If she remained a spinster, she would never know the feeling of holding her babe in her arms. And God forgive her, when she looked at Ava-Marie’s innocent, laughing face, she had the strongest longing for a child.

Suddenly, causing a scandal and fleeing to Cornwall to become a spinster no longer seemed the ideal answer to her problems.

Would that deny her the chance to marry and have children?

As she and Ava-Marie walked toward the galley to find Caitria, she watched the two men walking away.

One tall and dark, the other brown-haired and tall and broad.

Both had offered her marriage, but only one of them could hurt her.

Or if she were brave, one of them could turn her life into something wonderful…

if she was daring enough to try. Was she?

Ava-Marie squeezed her hand and in that moment, her frustration with herself reached its peak.

She thought of everything Tiffany had done. Throwing caution to the wind, investing her money to make a better life, regardless of society’s dictates. Then facing a man like Sprat and being brave when he’d kidnapped her. She’d managed to escape on her own.

Then there was Ashley who stuck her nose up to those who judged her because of some scandal. She still enjoyed her life and lived it to the fullest with wonderful friends and family at her side.

She was part of the sisterhood and she was strong with them at her back.

This adventure was just what she’d needed.

She’d had to face the fact that her situation was of her own making.

She’d been a coward, and she had to learn how to stand up to her brother and the world to get what she wanted out of her life.

This time, she’d tell Lord Franklin to go to hell.

In fact, she couldn’t wait to see his face.

Soon she was skipping across the deck as if the weight of the world had lifted off her shoulders.

*

“So, prior to finding Farah in your trunk on board this ship, you didn’t have any—relationship with her?”

Rockwell wondered what was behind such a question and he didn’t like how it made him feel. The thought of Farah having an alternative to him if the scandal came out made him happy, but the idea of Lucien—or any man—being intimate with Farah enraged him.

“Other than as my sister’s friend, no.”

“May I ask why she is not marrying you, since this trip thoroughly comprised her?”

Lucien’s tone told him he better have offered. “She doesn’t want to marry me.”

“What did you do?” Lucien growled. “She’s a sensible woman. She must see that she has no choice.”

Rockwell wished he knew the answer. Surely, it couldn’t be that she would risk a scandal just for something called love?

He thought back to Tiffany and Wolf’s wedding and understood that real love existed.

Maybe he was just too selfish to let it in.

“She knows that a wife of an adventurer is a lonely one. I’m not great husband material. ”

Lucien sipped his coffee as they sat around the stateroom dining table. “And a man with little to offer in terms of financial security, with no memory of his previous life, is probably no better option.”

Bloody hell, Lucien was serious about his offer.

Rockwell’s stomach clenched. He should be happy that his best friend found a woman he felt comfortable with, given his family’s financial situation, but his brain revolted at the idea.

Rockwell had the winning strategy. “Lady Courtney is still technically your fiancée, since you were never married. How are you going to approach that?”

“A part of me hopes that when I see her, it might spark a memory. But having met you, and knowing how close we were as friends, I won’t get my hopes up.”

“But it doesn’t mean you can’t start over?”

Lucien paused with his coffee cup partway to his mouth. “But, like you, is it fair to Lady Courtney? I’m not the same man.”

“Shouldn’t that be her decision?” Rockwell shrugged. “Besides, I think fundamentally you are the same man. You are honest, kind, loyal. You’re already focused on helping your family. I think Lady Courtney will see a lot of her fiancé in you.”

Lucien fiddled with his cup. “But I can’t force feelings and—I like—Farah.”

Rockwell stilled his features, trying not to give anything away. “You have one major problem.” At Lucien’s raised eyebrow, he said, “She is Lady Courtney’s best friend and she won’t do anything that might hurt Courtney.”

Lucien said nothing. He simply sat there drinking his coffee. Finally, he muttered, “One’s brain rarely rules the heart.”

What the hell did that mean? Was he saying he still wanted to pursue Farah? Rockwell inwardly smiled. Of all the men in England who might court Farah, he didn’t fear Lucien. Farah would do nothing to hurt Courtney, and Lucien could try all he liked. Farah would never be Lucien’s wife.

But someone would marry Farah, and he wondered if he could stand that?

“I think you should wait to meet Lady Courtney. It is the honorable thing to do, given that she is still technically your fiancée.”

“But you and Lady Farah agreed to keep the fact I never married Ava a secret.”

Rockwell sighed. “I had forgotten that point.”

“Is this sudden desire to point me towards a lady I previously knew instead of aiding Farah because you have feelings for Farah?”

He had feelings. If he were a selfish bastard, he’d claim her and leave her sitting at home with his children.

“No.” He stood up and moved round the table and placed a hand on Lucien’s shoulder.

“I’m saying this because I know Farah very well.

If you go down this road, she will rebuff you.

If you don’t understand why, you don’t understand Farah and you will only cause her and Courtney pain. I don’t think you want to do that.”

With that, he left to go back on deck, leaving Lucien to his thoughts.

As he stepped foot on deck, he almost knocked over Ava-Marie. He swung her into arms just as Caitria came running up. “Sorry, we are playing tag.” Farah came puffing behind.

Rockwell tickled Ava-Marie under the chin. “Just be careful running around the deck. We don’t want any accidents.”

“We are about to go below for lunch and an afternoon sleep.” Farah looked over her shoulder. “The coast is nearby. I assume we’ll dock tonight.”

“Yes. It will take that long given we have no wind. We need the tide to help take the ship in.”

“Will we be sleeping on the ship tonight?”

“Yes. We’ll leave by carriage in the morning once we’ve arranged everything.”

“Then I’m pleased we’ve let Ava-Marie have a run around today. It’s going to be a tiring journey for her.”

Was she criticizing his decision to go overland? “I thought you wanted to get home as soon as possible?”

She bit her bottom lip. “I did—I do. But…I’m thinking of the child.”

Rockwell put Ava-Marie down and said to Farah, “I’m more worried about your reputation.” And then a thought struck him. “And mine. If you are caught, I’ll be forced to propose. I won’t compromise my reputation as a gentleman, and if you refuse me… You’ll be absolutely ruined,” Rockwell warned.

He turned and walked away.

“Are you all right?” Caitria asked. “He seemed upset.”