Page 37 of Knot Going Down (OlympicVerse #3)

KNOX

I know why Ava ran. Her scent fumigated my thoughts—sharper this time, more intense than it was the other night.

Utterly intoxicating. She’s not just my scent match.

She’s the answer to a desire I’ve spent years searching for.

Something I’ve buried so deep, I barely recognized it until it smacked into my life back in Paris.

Emily.

She was never going to be with me as long as I didn’t have an omega. And there was always the chance that whatever omega I ended up with wouldn’t like Emily, so I’ve kept my distance, like she’s kept hers. She’s too good for me anyway.

But now there’s Ava.

Ava and Emily.

I’ve seen the way the two of them look at each other, and it’s filling my head with all kinds of ideas.

What if we could be a pack? I’m not worthy of them. Not yet. But I could become the man they deserves. With Ly and Ava at my side—maybe Lucas, too—I could do it. I would do it. I’d do anything.

I don’t know Ava all that well, but from what I’ve seen, I like her.

She’s got this sharp, spirited energy that fascinates me.

She keeps her walls up, but that’s something I understand.

There’s a darkness in her eyes that makes me want to be good for her, and a natural authority in the way she carries herself that draws out something obedient in me.

I might be an alpha, but I’ve always taken pleasure in submission—at least with the right person.

And Ava? She’s exactly the kind of person I’d kneel for.

I say a silent prayer that I’ll get the chance.

“Where’s Emily and Ava?” Declan asks. He’s down the hall from the elevator, holding two corsages and a boutonnière.

Of course there’s no flowers for me. Not that I care.

I prefer to be the one giving flowers than getting them.

I imagine pinning a boutonnière to Declan’s massive chest, being sure to poke him repeatedly with the pin.

Maybe I’ll get him one for Glenn’s daughter’s wedding.

“Ava ran off. Emily went to check on her,” Lucas says before I can answer Declan’s question with a lie. I glare at him.

“Why’d she run off?”

“Upset about something I did.” I cross my arms over my chest. “You know me.” There’s a challenge in the words, but I’d rather him think I was being a jackass and scared her, than suspect what really happened.

Lucas looks at me with confusion like he doesn’t understand why I’m not telling Declan this huge news.

It’s not like Ava will be able to hide it long.

Even with suppressants, if she perfumes like that again, Declan will know.

But it’s not my place to tell him. And I’m sure as hell gonna do everything possible to keep her secret and get her what she needs.

Plus, I don’t like the idea of Declan catching a whiff of my scent match.

“Maybe I should go find them,” Declan says.

“No.” I grab his arm to stop him. “Ly’s got it under control.”

The last thing I want is another alpha stealing my girls away from me.

Not before I can make my intentions known.

And if Declan gets close to Ava, there’s no doubt in my mind he’ll try.

No way he could resist that sweet, toasty scent with just the right hit of tart before the creamy goodness rides over.

He’s already got his hooks in Emily. Hopefully, Ava’s got her hooks in Ly more, and I can steal them both away from him.

I might not have much to offer, but I’ve got a little saved away.

Once Glenn’s out of the picture, maybe I can go back to college.

I’ll get a job doing construction, like I used to do during the summers in high school, back when Ly and I were together.

I liked fixing things. Maybe I could fix this. Fix me. For her—for them—I’d do it.

“We should go to dinner. They’ll catch up. It seemed like Ava needed a minute alone.” I look at Lucas for backup.

“Yes, I think that is what they would want,” he says, though there’s no real conviction behind it.

What they really want are those suppressants.

They’d be so relieved if I managed to get my hands on them.

It wouldn’t be too hard. I’m no master pickpocket, but I’ve slipped a wallet or two in my time—mostly harmless stuff, like snagging a friend’s and pulling out a photo just to prove I could.

Prank-level mischief. Nothing more. I’m a drug dealer.

Not a thief. But this is taking back what's rightfully mine.

Declan lets out a sharp breath, lingering for a beat before turning down the hall. “Fine.”

Lucas stays beside me, a few paces behind Declan. Officer Tight Ass doesn’t wait for us as he exits through the glass double-doors and onto the open-air deck leading to the dining room.

“I need you to distract him,” I whisper, letting the door close behind me as I follow Declan like his well-trained dog. Fucker doesn’t even look back to make sure I’m still coming.

Lucas shoots me a raised brow. “What are you planning?”

When I don’t answer, he tilts his head, clearly confused, but nods.

He speeds up and falls in beside Declan, tossing out a casual question about what might be served for dinner.

His pinky brushes Declan’s, and the two share a look that twists something sharp in my stomach.

Intimate. Familiar. The kind of look that says maybe I’m already too late.

Declan’s clearly the better choice. Stable.

Respectable. Everything my parents think I am, but I’m not.

As they talk, I drift closer. Quiet, careful. Before we round the corner by the deck railing, I fake a stumble and crash into Declan. My hand slips cleanly into his back pocket. His wallet is exactly where I knew it’d be. Predictable bastard.

But before I can step back, his fingers clamp tight around my wrist.

“What the hell are you doing?” he growls.

With my free hand, I yank the baggy of pills out of the billfold in a maneuver I’m quite proud of. “Taking back what’s mine.”

His eyes narrow. Without a word, he slams me against the railing, pinning me there with the full weight of his body.

“You’re smarter than this.”

“A compliment? Don’t sweet talk me, Officer McLaren.” I flutter my lashes in an exaggerated tease just to piss him off.

“It’s not a compliment.” He grabs both my wrists—the one holding the wallet and the one holding the small bag of pills—and grips them against the pole of the railing.

Stepping closer, he pins me with his body weight.

“Why? What were you going to do? Sell them to someone on the ship? You realize even if you destroyed the evidence, it’s too late for you.

I have a signed statement. You committed to helping us with Glenn.

You’re getting a good fucking deal. Why risk all that? ”

I press my lips together, tight. Swallowing the truth.

“Tell me!” It’s not a bark, but it’s pretty damn close.

“You wouldn’t understand.” I turn my face away, unable to look him in the eye. Not when his stare makes something inside me twist in a way I don’t want to name.

“Enlighten me,” he says, voice low, but no less demanding.

“Bite me,” I snap—too fast, too sharp—and the second it’s out of my mouth, I realize the implication.

He drops my wrists like I burned him and jerks back a full step.

“Maybe we should all take a breath,” Lucas says from somewhere behind Declan.

“No.” Declan plants his hands on his hips, glaring at me like I’ve personally insulted his sense of justice. “I want an answer. Explain it to me.”

Shit, I want to. I want to tear him down off his high horse and make him see.

Make him feel what it’s like to be one of us—the ones without access, without medical care, without safety nets.

The omegas who get bonded against their will because they can’t hide what they are.

I want him to understand what it means to survive when the system doesn’t fucking care.

I want to scream it at him. Shake him until he knows what it is to be desperate. To need something so badly your hands quake trying to get it. To watch someone you care about fall apart because they’re afraid—because they can’t control what’s happening inside their own body.

I want him to feel that.

But I can’t say any of it. Not here. Not now. Not when the words would only make things worse for Ava.

So instead, I stay silent. Swallow the pain and turn my face away, jaw clenched so tight it aches. The ocean churns behind me, matching the tidal wave inside my gut.

He waits. Watching me. “I want an answer. Explain it to me.”

Fuck, he’s not gonna let this go, is he?

I want to grab him by the collar and drag him into my world.

Into Mercy’s reality. Show him what it’s like for the omegas who don’t have the luxury of choice, who have to smuggle suppressants because the law thinks their biology is a leash.

Who get bonded because shithead alphas can’t control their teeth and their dicks.

I want him to look those women in the eye and tell them they’re criminals for trying to survive.

Something in me snaps. The words, the anger, the hunger, all of it boils up, and I’m moving before I can stop myself.