Page 73 of Kill for a Kiss

My chest goes tight, too tight to breathe right. “Yeah?”

She nods, looking down into her mug. “We went to a café.”

I can’t help it. I let out a breath that’s a laugh and a sigh. “Yeah, for a proper breakfast.”

Her smile tugs some more. “You got this ridiculous frozen coffee…”

That makes me grin. “And I made you try that pastry the size of your face.”

She laughs, the sound faint but real, and it hits me like a freight train. God, I missed that laugh. It’s enough to knock the wind out of me, only from her remembering something about me. One little piece of what we had. And I hold on to it like it’s gold.

From the kitchen, I hear the subtle clink of dishes. Sterling’s moving around. But I know he’s listening. He’s not gonna say anything. But I don’t miss the chill in his silence.

I lean back a little in my chair, trying to be casual, even though my heart’s doing cartwheels. “Good to know some things stuck,” I murmur. “Maybe next time I’ll bring the frozen coffee again. You know, for proper breakfast tradition.”

Her smiling eyes meet mine again. Elle actually laughs. It’s proof that maybe we’re not completely wrecked after all. Maybe we’ve still got pieces that fit. She keeps going. “I also remember watching a movie.”

I nod, trying not to grin too hard. My lip’s still split. “Yeah. A stupid horror flick with the worst special effects I’ve ever seen.”

Her nose scrunches when she smiles, and I swear to god, it’s the best thing I’ve seen in days. Maybe ever. Then she draws in a slow breath. “I remember eating in the sunroom a few times with you.”

My chest thuds.

“And Clo.”

There it is. Right on cue. The air in the room pulls tight. My grip’shard around my knees. I don’t say anything. What am I supposed to say?Yeah, I remember too.I remember thinking we were happy in that little lie.

Elle breaks the silence first, voice coming out cautious. “I don’t remember everything. There’s still a lot missing, but some things come back clearer.”

I nod, jaw working. “That happens with Kys—what Clo gave us.”

Her eyes move to mine, and I bet she wants more than that. So I give it to her.

“It works different on everybody. Some people just get real chill. Some lose days. Some start seeing things that aren’t there. But it always messes with memory. Makes everything easier to stomach.” I pause, fingers twitching on my knee. “Like…”

“Living in a lucid dream,” she finishes.

I nod, throat itching. “Yeah.”

But she shakes her head. “More like a nightmare.”

That one lands even harder. Right in the ribs. Because the shittiest part is Ilikedthat dream. Hell, I lived for it. I didn’t care if it was fake. I didn’t want to wake up. Even if it was borrowed—even if it was built on lies—I’d go back in a heartbeat.

But I can’t say that. So I stay quiet. Heavy with everything else I want to say but can’t. I know if I open my mouth, I’ll ruin it. I’ll make her hate me.

Right now, I stand a chance to stick around. So I grit my teeth and sit in it.

Then Sterling comes back. He sets a plate in front of me like he’s dropping off orders at a military base. “Eat. You look like hell.”

I huff. “You always know how to make a guy feel welcome.”

“Not trying to.” He sits beside Elle again.

I don’t even have the strength to be mad about it. I’m too damn hungry. I dig in without hesitation, barely chewing, just swallowingand swallowing because it’s warm, and I can finallytastesomething again. Maybe I moan a little. Whatever. Don’t judge.

Sterling doesn’t say a word about me eating like a stray dog. Doesn’t tell me to slow down. He’s focused on Elle now, watching her pick at her food like she’s more interested in moving it around than putting it in her mouth.

And then, he picks up her fork. Lifts a bite to her lips. And she lets him. She opens her mouth like it’s the most normal thing in the world, as if this is something they just do now. And I… I feel it like a punch. Right in the center of everything I’ve been trying to hold together.