Page 8

2 months later

Dear Spillit,

My boyfriend and I have been together for years, but I can tell he’s losing interest. What can I do to spice things up?

From Minktoast

Dear Minktoast,

Relationships are tough, even tougher when the strains of college are factored in. If you’re certain it’s just a rut, then I’d recommend…

What the hell would I recommend?

“Sienna!” I hollered over the desk in the newsroom to my raven-haired friend. She rolled her chair around and dipped her chin so she could look at me from over her glasses. “I need your help . What would you do to spice up a long-term relationship?”

With the question piquing her interest, she popped off her chair and made her way to me even though it was just the two of us. She rested her butt against my desk and gave me an amused smile. “How would I know? The longest relationship I’ve ever had is with my manicurist, and I get a new one each time.” She flicked her nails, admiring the pristine white polish and their perfect square edge, then narrowed her eyes at me.

“Helpful,” I said before skimming my fingers across the keyboard, hoping I would suddenly be inspired to write something.

Sienna leaned in. “Why are you asking? Are you in a secret relationship that you’re trying to spice up or something?”

I rolled my eyes. My track record in relationships was just as embarrassing as hers at this point. “No. It’s for Spillit .”

“Ah, that makes more sense. Subtlety isn’t your strong point.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You couldn’t keep a secret to save your life. Do you remember when you dated that guy Adam? You were all over him in a latex body suit, making sure everyone knew he was your man and what he was fondling.”

I shook my head, my cheeks heating. “We weren’t that serious.” It was the truth. I wasn’t even that into Adam, I just assumed dating him might help me get over his best friend. I was wrong. So very wrong.

“What happened between you two, anyway? You guys were a better version of Barbie and Ken than Margot Robbie and Ryan Gosling.” She tipped her chin to the sky in contemplation. “Although, that could be because Ryan’s hair was atrocious in that movie.”

“Adam and I never had a chance.” I interrupted her train of thought. “He graduated and moved to play for the Fort Lauderdale Gators before anything serious could happen. Oh, there’s also the fact that he was desperately in love with my old roommate. That can dampen new relationship.”

Sienna’s eyes bugged out. “What?” She paused, processing my words, and I stared at her nonchalantly. “How is this the first time I’m hearing about this?”

I shrugged. “It’s not that big a deal.”

“You sure? Because, no offense to you, but that sounds like a pretty hot scenario. Sneaking behind your best friend’s back, trying to steal her boyfriend. Bet she was giving BJs on the couch while you were in the shower.”

I cringed. As much as I liked Hayden and Adam, thinking about them doing anything other than holding hands felt awkward and a little dirty. Especially since the last time I saw them I was holding back tears. Hayden knew I was upset, but she also knew not to ask why.

“It wasn’t like that.” I waved my hand flippantly, trying to not look like I was desperate to get onto another topic of conversation. “They were friends for years. It was a chance encounter for them, and I was the one third-wheeling in that relationship.”

“Third-wheeling?” She smiled wickedly, making her eyebrows dance.

I rolled my eyes. “Nothing kinky happened, so get your mind out of the gutter.”

“Fine, but why did I have no idea about it?”

I shrugged, waving my hand. “You were busy stalking the hockey team last year.”

Sienna gasped. “Stalking? I’m their main reporter. They need me. If I don’t follow them around like a hawk chasing its prey, then they’ll get absolutely no coverage in this school.”

She had a point. Covey U had been sleeping on their hockey team for the last few years. It was only after some alumni’s son started coming here that things picked up for them. That was as much as I knew about the sport.

“I’m not questioning your journalistic integrity, I’m asking for advice.” I subtly veered back to the matter at hand since talking about my love life, or lack thereof, was getting depressing. “How should a couple in a rut spice things up?”

Sienna flitted her hand in the air as though she was trying to come up with something. “I don’t know. Maybe suggest they get some new lingerie?”

Her eyes lit up, and she leaned in closer. “Oh, wait. I’ve got it. What about a new toy?” She wiggled her eyebrows and pulled open my desk drawer. I looked down at the sealed bright-pink box but made no attempts to take it out.

When she realized my reluctance, she huffed out a breath and pulled it out herself, then dropped it on the desk in front of me with a smirk.

I raised my brow but was too surprised she got it out to say anything.

“Weren’t you supposed to write a review on this last year?” The gentle tapping of her finger against the box was the only noise in the room as I stared down at it.

A picture of a neon-pink rose-shaped vibrator stared back at me. I hadn’t even attempted to take that thing home, in fear I’d get mugged and the assailant would know my evening plans.

Sienna pointed at the center of the rose, circling it with her finger. “I heard that this thing can make your toes curl and your eyes roll in less than ten seconds.”

“I wouldn’t know,” I said, pushing the box back in her direction. “Besides, I wasn’t asked to review it. That would be weird. Someone gave it to me as my Secret Santa gift last year, which I can only assume was you because there’s no way Dillon would gift me this.”

Her lips tipped up, confirming that fact. “Still think it would make an awesome review. Imagine all of the engagement we’d get for it?”

“If you think it’s such a great idea, then you write it.”

Sienna frowned, looking back down at the box.

“Maybe I will, but I’ll get my own. Don’t want to deprive you of anything. Not gonna lie, it might do you some good.”

Since asking for Sienna’s advice was getting me nowhere, I tried to type out a response to Spillit again.

Dear Minktoast

Times are tough, why not spice things up by showing your boyfriend a different side of you. Maybe even buy some—

Sienna gasped, interrupting my flow. “Oh my gosh. I completely forgot to ask you how that NFL wedding went? Get any good stories?”

Her eyes glinted with mischief, and she bit down on her bottom lip.

I cringed. The only story that came out of that night besides Devin and Reign getting married was my demise. My breathing became heavy as embarrassment flared through every fiber of my being. I’d done a great job ignoring Matty since then, and thankfully, everyone who was at the wedding was too busy over the summer to ask questions. But we were back in college now, and I was certain everything would come out soon.

“The wedding was great. My friend was a beautiful bride, and the ceremony was fantastic. They had roses and daisies everywhere. It was amazing.”

“Then why do you look like you want to gouge my eyes out for asking the question?”

My smile dropped. I really thought I’d managed to disguise my annoyance. “Nothing much. Just some other bullshit went on around it that I’d like to forget.”

“Seriously?” Sienna dipped her head so she could look at me more directly. I answered with a look, and she knew instantly.

“Whoa. What the hell happened? It must have been major for you to act like this. You’re never dramatic.”

I gulped, knowing I’d given too many hints and wasn’t going to get Sienna off this topic. She was like a dog with a bone when she thought she’d sniffed out a story, and I’d accidentally given her one.

“Is it because you went alone and all the single cousins hit on you? Did you take a ride on a dud?”

“I didn’t ride a lonely cousin.”

Sienna looked almost disappointed at the admittance. “Oh, I get it. That’s the problem. You didn’t take a ride, so you were lonely as fuck?”

“No. You know what? Can we just drop this? I shouldn’t have mentioned it in the first place.”

“Honestly, I still don’t get why you and your floppy-haired ‘bestie’ didn’t go together. What’s his name again? Mickey McMichaelson?”

“Matty Mathieson.”

She rolled her eyes, groaning. “I knew it was a stupid name. But honestly, you’ve been vibing with that guy since I met you freshman year, and here we are, seniors, and you’re still pining over him like he invented milk.”

I rolled my office chair back to face my computer and sighed. “Yeah, well, that pining is well and truly over with.” I glared down at my hand as though it would erase the memory of Matty, but it did nothing except solidify what a stupid mistake I’d made.

“What happened?” Sienna whispered, resting her hand on my back. A tear rolled down my cheek, so I wiped my eyes clean. Great. I was making it obvious that something big happened.

“I can’t talk about it.” My voice was meek and broken, which was exactly how I felt after having to admit to myself that I nearly ruined my best friend’s engagement.

I didn’t do that kind of thing. I was the girl who loved fairytales and romance. I only ever dreamed about having a relationship like my parents, and doing anything remotely sordid didn’t feel right.

I was still looking for my one true love, and stupidly, my heart wanted to believe I’d already found him in Matty.

“No problem. You don’t have to,” she said, slapping my back so painfully it knocked the sadness right out of my chest. “I think I know what would make you feel better.” I glanced up at her, thankful she hadn’t mentioned how glassy my eyes were. “A change.”

“Of what? My clothes?”

“No. You need to get yourself out there. Meet new guys. Hang out with some people you haven’t known your entire college career. This is your senior year, after all. You’re going to have to face the big bad world of broadcasting soon. You need to have some fun while you can.”

Sienna looked at me earnestly, and I wanted to smile. She had good intentions, but sometimes I wondered if she operated on a different level than everyone else. She never let emotions get the better of her, and often times, I questioned if she felt anything at all, but it wasn’t like I’d given her context over why I was so upset. That was probably why she was so adamant that jumping into another guy’s bed would make this better.

“You know,” she drawled out, and I inwardly groaned, refusing to take my eyes off the computer screen.

I loved Sienna with all my heart, but the thing I’d learned the most about her was if you gave her an inch, she’d take a mile.

“There’s this guy …”

“No.”

She poked her lips out, frowning like a petulant child.

“You didn’t even hear me out.”

“Because I’m not interested in a blind date.”

“Who said anything about blind? Does Erik Steele ring any bells?”

“None at all.”

She glared up to the sky and huffed out a breath of annoyance. “Well, he’s on the hockey team.”

“Doesn’t the hockey team hate you?”

“Not anymore.”

“But they did?”

“Yeah, sophomore year we had a huge misunderstanding. They like me now, though.” She twisted her lips, contemplating. “Although, it might be because Dash Bridges and Cade Bright are gone. They were the ones that couldn’t stand me. But anyway, I like to think I’ve made somewhat of a friendship with Erik.” She looked me up and down, her lip curling with disdain. “Not the way you and Matty are friends, though. That’s just a complicated mess.” She shook her head. “But that’s not the point. I think you and Erik would really hit it off. I will warn you, he’s kind of a player, but I’m almost certain it’s because he hasn’t found the right girl. Yet.”

“And you think that girl is me?”

“Why couldn’t it be? You love to watch sports. He plays a sport. I couldn’t think of a better life for the two of you.”

“I’ve never once watched hockey.”

“At all?” She raised a brow.

“Nope. Not even an accidental second at a sports bar. My family are baseball and football people. If one of those games is on, we aren’t leaving the house.”

“So? Switch sides. Hockey boys are pucking awesome.”

“And you’re pucking deluded.”

“I don’t think so. I’ve already thought of the perfect ship name for the two of you.”

She held her hands up as though she was showcasing something.

“Brik,” she said so proudly I couldn’t figure out if she was joking or not.

I stared at my friend, thinking she’d lost her mind, until her shoulders dropped.

“Okay, well, if it’s not hockey guys, then you might have to settle for the football team. Although, I seriously doubt Matty would let you date one of his teammates.”

And she did it again. Mentioned the boy who ripped my heart out, shoved it in a toaster, turned it on, then threw it in a filled bathtub.

This year would be a nightmare if I couldn’t even get through my first day of journalism without mentioning him. It didn’t help that I was lead anchor for the football team, which meant player interviews and analyses were coming my way. As much as I dreaded seeing Matty again, I needed the broadcasting gig more. Not only would it give me the right credits for graduation, but it was my dream.

I always wanted to be a broadcaster with the NFL, and this was a steppingstone for it.

“But I guess if you show up wearing some daisy dukes and another player’s jersey, there’s no way Matty could stop his teammates from being into you. I hear Jackson James is single.”

“I’m not going to date anyone on the football team. It’s my first and only opportunity to be lead anchor, and I want to be taken seriously.”

“Okay. You’re right.” She looked up to the sky and frowned. “I get it. Chally Sports isn’t going to want to take on a sports broadcaster who dates someone on the team. Imagine the mess if there’s a breakup.”

I gulped. It wasn’t a code I was afraid to break over the summer. It was only now that I needed a convenient reason not to date a player that I used it.

“I don’t feel great.” Pulling open the drawer next to Sienna, I grabbed a bottle of Pepto-Bismol and cranked it open, drinking the pink liquid straight from the bottle.

Sienna’s face drained as I gulped down the thick fluid. “Oh no.”

“What?” I wiped my mouth with my arm and licked away any remnants.

“How did I not see it before?”

“See what?”

“The refusal to tell me what happened with Matty. The reluctance to go on a date. Your bowel issues. Brittany Brennon, are you pregnant with Matty Michaelson’s little Michaels?”

“It’s Mathieson, and no.” Thankfully, I’d swallowed the Pepto-Bismol before she had the audacity to ask that.

“Are you sure? Did you use protection.”

We might have gotten alarmingly close, but there was no point in mentioning that. It was all a distant memory at this point. I wasn’t pregnant. I couldn’t be.

“Doesn’t there have to be some kind of insertion for that to happen?”

“Oh, Britt.” She pointed at my face. “Didn’t I just say you were terrible at keeping secrets? You didn’t have sex, but clearly, something happened.”

I pursed my lips.

“I knew it. That guy is in love with you. Honestly, how you didn’t get together before is beyond me. When you’re in the room, he can’t stop looking at you.”

“Enough! He’s not in love with me, and hearing those things only makes this harder.”

Sienna stepped back, surprised at my outburst. I wasn’t one to get angry usually, but the constant mention of Matty was reminding me of the worst day of my life.

“I’m sorry, B.” She was much quieter now, looking at me with the sympathy I was trying to avoid. “I don’t know what went down between you and Matty, but it’s clearly messing you up, and I hate seeing that. You know I’m here if you want to talk. I promise I won’t jump to conclusions like I did just now. I will listen, and I’m here when you’re ready to tell me.”

“Thanks,” I quipped, still unwilling to look at her. I’d overreacted mainly because I was keeping everything pent up inside, worried that if I told her the truth, I’d have a meltdown at my desk.

Sienna squeezed my shoulder as she silently walked past. I’d apologize for my little scene tomorrow, but first, I needed to finish the answer to the stupid Spillit blog.

Rereading the question, I couldn’t figure out anything insightful to say, and it only made me more annoyed.

I hated this stupid blog. Not just because I was terrible at giving advice, but because it was the sole reason I attended that bonfire freshman year. Ergo, it was the sole reason I was best friends with Matty in the first place. If that hadn’t happened, would I even be feeling this heartbreak right now?

Matty would have been the cute kicker in my class who I admired, and that would have been it. I’d have never known just how much we had in common or what it felt like to be around him.

I wrote out a nonsensical answer, not really caring about the poster’s problem because she had nothing to complain about. She had a boyfriend to fight for. I had nothing except embarrassing memories.

I’d spent my entire college career pining over a guy who saw me as nothing more than his best friend. Then I fell for his drunken words, thinking he actually wanted me, and let him go down on me, only to realize he was engaged.

Engaged!

The word flittered through my head as I tried to make sense of it again. It just didn’t match up to what happened between us, and that was making it hard to get over.

My gaze drifted to my phone, and I laughed bitterly at just how many texts Matty had sent me over the summer. Strangely, it didn’t matter how many times I blocked it, the messages still came through.

I’m sorry, Britt.

Can we talk about us and everything that happened in Vegas?

I know it was a lot, but I can fix it.

Britt, please. I don’t want to lose you.

By the end of the summer, I thought he’d finally given up, but the week we got back here, he ramped up the messages again.

I couldn’t hide from him forever. We were in a lot of the same classes, but I had to protect myself.

My brain knew my place in Matty’s life, but my heart was fighting against it. There was no way I could hear him say “I’m engaged” without crumpling onto the floor in a mess and crying my eyes out.

He would never be mine.

I hoped if I saw pictures of the happy couple together, it might help desensitize me to the entire experience. Pictures were still. A memory frozen in time that couldn’t watch my heartbreak.

Talking would destroy me. His low, buttery tone was my kryptonite and had the ability to make my legs wobble without even trying.

I bit down on my bottom lip as tears threatened to fall just thinking about it.

He’d try to let me down gently, saying he still wanted to be friends. Then I’d have to say it was a drunken mistake and none of it counted. He’d probably sigh from relief and tell me how in love with Olana he was, and being the dutiful best friend, I’d have to be happy for him.

My stomach dropped thinking about the prospect. Would he make me Best Woman at their wedding like Reign did with Adam? Clutching the Pepto, I took another slug, wondering if it were possible to overdose on this stuff but not inclined to stop.

As though he could hear my thoughts, Matty’s name popped up on my screen.

Matty: Hey. Are you on campus yet?

I flexed my fingers, stopping myself from sending him a rambling message filled with expletives, telling him to leave me alone. What good would that do?

He’d made his choice. I’d given everything I had to him, and it still wasn’t enough compared to Olana. Yelling and screaming would only make me look unhinged.

And hearing the words come out of his mouth wouldn’t do me any favors either.

It was stupid, and I was deluded. I needed to move on. A task that would be a little easier if I didn’t have to talk to him.

Taking a deep breath, I shook the thoughts out of my head and sat up straighter. I wouldn’t let Matty or his lack of love for me affect me anymore. It wasn’t worth it.

I turned my phone around and grazed my fingers across the keyboard, erasing my old answer for Spillit and replacing it with a new one.

Dear Minktoast

Times are tough, why not spice things up by showing your boyfriend a different side of you? Have you tried buying some new toys for the bedroom? That’s always a plot twist.

Kisses,

Spillit

There.

I wasn’t getting any anytime soon, but at least Minktoast was.