Page 12 of Just Another Silly Love Song

Tessa rushed into the on-air studio. “You can’t play this song. You know you’re breaking format and you could get in trouble.”

I waved off her comment. “A love song is a song about love. ‘Love Stinks’ is technically about love, is it not?”

“Your songs are supposed to encourage the listeners.”

“And that’s exactly what it’s doing! It’s encouraging people to stay as far away from love as possible.”

Tessa frowned. “You’re not yourself, Lori. This is not like you at all.”

Maybe I had finally snapped, but I didn’t care at the moment.

“Please . . . play a different song. Put on some Eric Clapton or Whitney Houston or the Righteous Brothers.”

I shook my head. “Sorry, I’ve lost that lovin’ feeling.”

She rolled her eyes.

Suddenly, I was overcome with laughter and I couldn’t stop. “Of all the crazy things to happen, my boyfriend chose to break up with me on the radio.”

I laughed again, shook my head, and wondered if I was starting to lose my mind.

“You need to get back to your show,” Tessa said. “Shake it off. Take the caller on line three.”

“I have a better idea.” I slid my headphones over my head, faded out the song, and tapped the microphone button. “You’re listening to Love Songs and Dedications with Lori, and well, isn’t it funny how your life can change in the blink of an eye? Well, maybe notfunny, but you know what I mean.” I pressed line one on the phone, even though Tessa hadn’t screened the caller. “You’re on the air with Lori, who’s this?”

“Hi, Lori. This is Frida. Your boyfriend is a total jerk!”

“You got that right.”

“The same thing happened to me. My boyfriend was supposed to be splitting the rent with me every month, but I had been paying the whole thing for over a year. When I had finally had enough and brought it up, he said that I should be more supportive and understanding since he was trying to get out of debt. I told him to get out of my house instead.”

“Good riddance! Who needs a deadbeat man? Not me, I’ll tell you that much.”

Tessa shook her head and walked out of the studio.

“And you know what, Lori? I was fine before I met him and I’ll survive without him.”

“Yes, Frida! That’s a great attitude to have, and I have the perfect song for you. Thanks for calling.”

I played “I Will Survive” by Gloria Gaynor and cranked the music up again.

The calls kept coming in, one after another, more calls than I had ever had in the past. It was like I had hit the energize button on the female population and motivated them even more to call in. Who would have thought my on-air break-up would have resulted in my busiest night?

The calls were different, though. Instead of looking for support and encouragement, these women were looking to vent. The songs I dedicated to them had changed as well:

“50 Ways to Leave Your Lover” by Paul Simon

“All By Myself” by Eric Carmen

“Alone Again (Naturally)” by Gilbert O’Sullivan

“Since U Been Gone” by Kelly Clarkson

“Ain’t No Sunshine” by Bill Withers

“It’s the End of the World as We Know It” by R.E.M.

“Total Eclipse of the Heart” by Bonnie Tyler