Page 241 of Jagged Souls

I’m fine.

I’m fine.

I’m fucking fine!

Running through the trees, I relish in the slap of the branches across my skin. I want to cut all of Antonio’s touch off me. Let the poison seep out. Let him die.

“You’re keeping him alive inside you.”

I know.

I know, and I don’t want to. But I don’t know how to get him off me.

I could never get them off me…

My chest heaving, I slam into a tree and clutch at the trunk as the memories assault me. I can feel them touching me all over again. Putting their hands on me. Their mouths. Their cocks. Violating me. Ruining me. Making me feel like a stranger inside my own skin. I want to feel like me again. I want to bewhole.

Feeling Varius come up behind me, I spin on my feet and throw myself at him. He tries to grab me to pull me into a hug, but I drop to my knees and pull at the front of his pants, my movements desperate, my hands shaking.

“Varius hasn’t fucked me.”

“Do you want him to?”

No.

I don’t want him to touch me at all. Just the thought of this is making me sick.

But I want to prove to myself that I’m okay.

“Micha –” He grabs my hands, and I struggle against him. Knowing he’ll let me go if I hurt myself, I twist my arms the wrong way, prepared to break my wrists. At least that pain would be bearable.

Cursing, he releases me. “Don’t use me as a substitute for the V.”

Ignoring him, I pull his cock out and suck the tip into my mouth. He stiffens as he starts to grow beneath my tongue. His hands move to my shoulders. His fingers dig into my skin. Before, his grip would have scared me – the blatant show of violence.

But now it causes unwanted arousal – my body recalling all the pain I got when I wasthere. Withthem.Taking the V.

My stomach churns. My self loathing strengthens. How can any parallel to that time give me pleasure? But I can’t deny the heat pooling in my pussy. I reach a hand between my legs and slip a finger inside myself.

“Micha, stop,” he hisses. But his hands don’t shove me off, and his cock is growing hard. If he really didn’t want this, he would stop me. He isn’t even trying to get away. He’s just trying to refuse me. He’s just trying to deny me something I want.

It gets him off, doesn’t it?

Telling me no. Taking away my control. Making me just his pathetic little bitch. Tears burn my eyes as their faces flash in front of me. Their cocks. Their orders. The pain and humiliation.

My teeth ache with the urge to snap down. Rip his cock off. Set myself free. But I squeeze my eyes shut.

I’m okay.

I’m okay.

I’m already free.

They can’t hurt me.

But the urge doesn’t go away. I’m going to –

“Get off me!” His roar of anger makes my pulse jerk inside my veins. I pull back, terrified of the punishment that’s coming, but I’ve moved too slow, and his fist is already slamming down on my head. Pain explodes down my face and neck, knocking me to the ground.