Page 5 of Is It Wrong to Escape My Fate? (Dealing With Fate #1)

Mia had her own private room next to mine, while the knights had theirs across the hallway. She left when we finished cleaning me as best as one possibly could with a basin. If there was one thing I missed from the modern world, it was having accessible bathrooms everywhere.

And internet.

Thankfully, magic wasn’t that divorced from the concept of technology. While the setting was a vague, medieval fantasy world, and the aesthetics designed around it, technology powered by electricity in my world were reinvented through spells and enchantments in this one.

One of the first things I discovered was my bathroom at our manor.

My bath always had warm water. I didn’t see anyone casting magic to heat it, and I realized pipe systems existed.

There were mages who serviced entire villages or towns if their lord could afford it.

What they did exactly was unknown to me, but it was interesting!

As I stared into the darkness, laid on this bed with the moonlight shining through a small window, I reminded myself again what I had to focus on, much like what I had been doing every night for the past two weeks.

Figure out how I got here by trying to recover my last memories in my real world.

Aided with that information, figure out how to go back.

Try to live an average life as a dutiful daughter of a baron by attending a mandatory magic school for the next five years, while also making sure nobody discovers I wasn’t really Beatrix .

I had about five years to figure this shit out, because once I graduated, there was a two-year conscription to the Kingdom’s army, fighting the forces of the Demon Lord. I doubted my chances of survival as a mage soldier.

That said … I sure hoped as fuck it wouldn’t take me five goddamned years to get out of here. Now that was enough time to acclimate yourself to a new place, as if I’d be telling myself I was very okay staying and living as Bea Havenglow until death.

Not in this lifetime.

I swiped my arms in the empty space before me, towards the ceiling, willing for something to pop up. In fictional stories of people who got sent to another world, this was the time a user interface would appear, confirming they were stuck in a video game.

There was no such thing.

Didn’t stop me from trying every night, though.

Of course, if this weren’t a video game, maybe it was a novel. Because that genre was possible too, wasn’t it? It went something like: in the original world, I read a book, and then I got sucked into it after some shenanigans.

But I wasn’t much of a book reader. I loved playing games, though! If I were going to be stuck anywhere, why couldn’t it have been a video game? Why, god? Gods?

At least the themes were similar, giving me a general idea of how things would be.

I hoped it would be uneventful for the rest of my stay here — AKA no sudden appearances of the Demon Lord, no out of this world miracles aside from my arrival, no weird events that would reveal I was not from this universe.

I could hope, right?

In the meantime, I had other pressing matters to attend to. Namely my pussy, which didn’t have any action since coming to this world. Two weeks of abstinence were driving me insane, and I had to do something about it soon , without compromising the family name.

Getting laid was so much easier when nobody cared who I was. I could hit the local bar and land someone decent looking enough sober. Or maybe the club where I could grind against someone willing to finger me without even seeing my face.

It didn’t feel right doing it here, in this body, but if I was to survive for the foreseeable future, this was one of my needs that demanded addressing. Like food and water. Like air.

I wanted to do it all the same. It would be a whole new experience that I had always been curious about. I dreamt about it constantly. If that made me a despicable and shameful woman, I didn’t care. I should have freedom over my body.

I gave in to the urge. Dressed in only a thin cotton dress, I slid my hands over my breasts, and lamented over the fact this body had bigger, perkier boobs than what I had.

I tugged my nipples, enjoying the tiny spark of pleasure, before I brought one of my hands lower to where my body ached for the most right now.

Pushing the edge of my dress higher on my hips, my fingers traced my exposed skin. I opted not to wear any underwear tonight because I knew I would get the need with how horny I was earlier.

Reuben’s whispered words, Robin’s innuendos, Eli’s heated gaze.

Fuck.

I plunged a finger in my core, gathering up the wetness to my clit, circling the sensitive area. I moaned into my darkened room before remembering I was somewhere with probably thin walls.

Didn’t matter. I played with my nipple with one hand as I toyed with my clit with the other, feeling the pleasure build up, trying to rein in my sounds.

I closed my eyes and imagined Robin’s tongue on my vacant nipple, aching to be sucked, while Reuben replaced my hand on my pussy with his mouth.

I wondered how Elias would kiss me again after all these years as I worked myself faster and faster to chase the high, my hips lifting off the bed.

“Come for us, Bea,” a ghost of a whisper sounded in my ear as I let out a strangled cry, coming on my hand. I drew in breaths, mind clearing from the fog of horniness as the orgasm subsided. Using my hand would do for now, but nothing beat the feel of a cock sliding in and out.

When I finally caught my breath, I realized I didn’t know if the voice I heard was imagined too. But when I opened my eyes, pupils already adjusted in the dim light, I was still alone in my room.

It was definitely my imagination, but it felt too real at the same time.

I fell asleep almost immediately after I put a temporary pause on my carnal needs by dealing with it myself.

Mia found me tangled in my sheets before she went to work, cleaning me up and dressing me.

She insisted on having me wear a new dress, but I didn’t do much in the past day; my previous dress was still clean.

I grinned as I headed downstairs, wearing my spoils of war.

“Good morning, my lady,” Robin greeted us while Reuben gestured to a table filled with food. They really were well-trained soldiers. How the heck could they wake up earlier than me, get suited in armor, and have time to acquire breakfast? I could never.

Elias joined us at the table, and we had a heavy breakfast, with the intention of stopping only for bathroom breaks as we continued our travel towards Aerahelm.

Halfway through the day, Reuben knocked on the window of my carriage as he rode alongside on horseback. I slid open the tiny glass pane to hear what he had to say.

“We’re approaching another town. We could stop here shortly and rest before moving onward to the next town, where we’d settle for the night.”

I scrunched my eyebrows. “Are we still in Viscount Drakon’s territory?”

“Yes,” Reuben answered, mixed with curiosity.

I didn’t like that man for how he treated Elias, so I didn’t want to stay here any longer than we had to. “If nobody else is tired from the trip, I would like to continue our trip to the next town. Whose land is that?”

“The following two towns we will pass after is Viscount Strom’s territory.”

My brain recalled whatever information I had about Viscount Strom.

He was an average noble, nothing special, and his reputation was preceded by his eldest son.

The son was a professor at Aerahelm and one of the best Water mages in recent years.

Instead of lending his power to the war effort, the Crown Prince himself assigned him to the magic academy, to “foster potentials” like him.

Concluding it was fine to stay in their town, I gave the confirmation to Reuben, who took charge in relaying my decision to the rest of the entourage.

I could sense Mia watching me from the corner of my eye. “What is it, Mia?” I asked, because I was a nosy bitch.

“O-oh! I’m sorry for staring, my lady,” she stuttered and lowered her head, as if she needed to do that in my presence. I reached over and tapped her knee to make her look up again.

I tilted my head at her. “Well, what is it you’re thinking about?”

She gave me a careful smile, her cheeks turning pink.

“I’m glad you’re back to your cheerful self.

The past few months had been difficult for the entire estate.

I thought you’d try to delay your schooling because of how withdrawn you were, and I was so surprised when you said you’re excited about it. ”

Oh. My. God.

Outside, I was as calm as a capybara, complete with a smile and chill attitude.

Inside, I was raging like a wild bear in complete disarray and panic.

Because how the hell did I not know that?

That OG Bea was going through a depressive episode before I came along?

Of course going from mellow to hyper would be weird!

And during the past two weeks, I thought I was clever and maintained the facade.

Did anybody else notice? It would make sense Mia would since she attended to me every day. But what about the rest of the household? The family physician? My knight bodyguards?

Why didn’t I know?

“You lamented over it quite a lot,” Mia murmured, clasping her hands together on her lap.

“How you didn’t want to go to the academy, even if it will let you see your brother every day.

As the days neared the start of the semester, you became weaker and more despondent.

Do you remember, Miss Bea, that you didn’t want me to tell the Lord and Lady about your condition?

I never knew why because I could never ask you of that. ”

“I didn’t want them to worry,” I replied all too fast. Bullshit.

“The Kingdom keeps a record of all eligible noble children for the academy,” she continued, relaying information that I didn’t ask for but definitely appreciated.

“It would be amiss if you didn’t attend at the appropriate time.

The Marshals would surely pay the barony a visit, and gentleness wasn’t their strong suit. ”

I knew these things suddenly. How it was a matter of life and death to attend the magic school.

How commoners with little magic were conscripted as soldiers for the Everlasting War against the Demon Lord.

How Inspectors traveled all around the Kingdom, searching for commoners with significant magical ability, to mandate them to attend the same academy.

Why was I so hesitant to attend the academy? The reason for that never surfaced in my mind, and I was so mad at myself right now for being unhelpful.

“I had a change of heart and realized the importance of fulfilling my duty as a noble,” I continued to bullshit at Mia, feigning sincerity in my words. “I didn’t want the barony to suffer. It’s not just me who will be in jeopardy, and thankfully I realized it in time.”

“You’re a kind and wonderful lady, Miss Bea,” my maid gushed, grinning widely with sparkle in her eyes. “I never lost faith in you. That’s why I heeded your words and followed your instructions. I knew you’d make the right choice, whatever it is!”

I wasn’t so sure about that, but how could I deny myself the rare opportunity to have someone on my side unquestionably?

The rest of our travel for the day was silent, with Mia not missing her afternoon nap.

Even until we stopped for the night at one of Viscount Strom’s towns, it had been a quiet affair, dining with Mia and my twin knights in a modest inn.

Elias, who had been on horseback, opted to camp with my other guards on the outskirts of town.

He did promise to not get in the way, but I wanted him with us, selfishly.

At the start of our fourth day of travel, Robin and Reuben approached me as Mia was fixing my second dress of the journey.

“We’ll be heading towards Count Lovell’s territory next,” Robin informed me.

“Today and tomorrow, we will be on their land. We wanted to tell you ahead of time since you seem curious about it.” His smile was so infectious that I smiled right back.

Count Lovell was a serious sort of man, or at least that was how I knew him from my limited knowledge of the Kingdom’s nobility.

My role model was his eldest daughter, Lady Valeria, who was currently his heir and one of the commanding officers in the army.

She wasn’t gifted with a lot of magical ability, but she made up for it with brawn and discipline.

She was a freaking badass.

Our trip was progressing just as Reuben had outlined in his plan.

Elias was still traveling with us, and I could catch glimpses of him from time to time, but aside from the first night when he asked for his favor, he hadn’t approached me again.

Did he hate me, still? I thought I had apologized to him for the incident years ago, but maybe I could ask for his forgiveness again.

As soon as we arrive at Aerahelm, I would.

On the sixth day of our journey, my twin knights informed me of our next and final destination before reaching the magic academy. “Duke Caenum’s city will be our stop for the night, and tomorrow, if things proceed as usual, we will be at Aerahelm by afternoon.”

Reuben’s calm voice soothed me as I recalled what knowledge I had about Duke Caenum.

Their family was one of the longest standing noble families of the Kingdom, spanning many generations.

Duke Caenum had at least three sons and two daughters.

I knew the eldest son was engaged to Lady Valeria, his second son was on active duty as a mage, while the third son was still at school.

There was a possibility I’d meet the third son, which was interesting. I lived the last few years as a recluse in our manor, so I wasn’t familiar socially with the other noble children.

Again, as expected from Reuben’s well-crafted itinerary, we arrived safely at Khildan, a city snug safely against the mountain edges, forming natural defenses.

What wasn’t expected was the welcoming committee that greeted us by the gates, Duke Caenum himself on horseback and leading the group. I didn’t want to admit it, but I was nervous, even though I was sure I had done nothing wrong.

So close to Aerahelm, yet so far …