Page 24

At least with the bodyguard that Niko has assigned to me, I can go out and almost feel normal. Wandering around the mall, he stays close to me, silent, but present.

I’m fine with the bodyguard. It’s a sweet gesture and a step towards me regaining my independence. I was going crazy, stuck in the safe house alone.

I thought that coming to the mall would be a nice way to clear my head and just get out—be around people—but now that I’m here, I am more lonely than I was inside the house.

I’m utterly miserable.

I’m heavy with thoughts about Nico and the mall is making it worse.

I glance behind me and the bodyguard smiles. It’s one of those polite smiles that doesn’t touch his eyes. I smile back. It doesn’t touch my eyes either.

“I think I’m done here,” I tell him.

“Oh—we just got here.”

I laugh. “I know, but it turns out I never wanted to be here in the first place.” He nods, even though his expression tells me he has no idea what I meant.

Nico’s call two nights ago has made me miss him a hundred times more. It made me feel so much more lonely.

Then, when he told me he was assigning a bodyguard, I was happy because I’d have someone around, just company—but this isn’t what I want. I want someone I love near me. Someone genuine and real, and comfortable.

What’s even worse is that it’s not only Nico I’m missing—it’s his entire family. Jade, Aly—

I’d even be happy if Luka rocked up for dinner.

I could talk to Yilian or Ark for an hour, and it would lift my mood. His brothers—his family—they were so warm and friendly. It was surprising how quickly they accepted me and made me feel like one of them.

I miss all of them.

I walk back to the car with the bodyguard, and he pulls open the back door for me so that I can climb in.

I settle down on the seat and pull my phone out, wondering if I should call him.

It’s risky.

I flick through old messages he’s sent me, the weight of his absence growing worse.

When my phone rings, I drop it in my lap in fright. The scramble to pick it up again.

Jade.

It’s like she was inside my head, knowing I was missing everyone.

“Hi,” I say into the phone, pressing it against my ear.

“Hey girl.” The chorus of two voices sings into the phone.

“Aly, Jade—“ I laugh.

“What are you doing? We miss you.” Aly says.

“We asked Nico the other night if we could take you to dinner, and he just said soon . What does that even mean?” Jade huffs.

“He gave me a bodyguard,” I tell them. “So, maybe he’ll be ok with me meeting you guys if the bodyguard tags along.”

“Oh my word, we are so used to having bodyguards around. Eventually, you don’t even notice them.” Aly giggles. “I’m going to call Nico tonight and get him to book us somewhere fancy for a girls' dinner.”

“I can’t wait.” I’m smiling from ear to ear as we chat about what they’ve been doing, and the new coat Aly got, and how Jade got annoyed with Rad, but he got home with a massive bunch of flowers and said sorry, so they made up.

Listening to them is like having someone flood hope into my heart.

My body is getting lighter by the second, and the weight of my pain is less intense.

I cup my hand over my tummy and smile. I want this little baby to grow up in a family filled with love. Love like the love I can feel pouring through the phone while I talk to Aly and Jade.

The phone call lasts the entire drive home, and we are laughing the whole way.

By the time I climb out of the car, my entire mood has shifted.

I’m smiling for the first time in what seems like forever.

Early the next morning, the bodyguard walks me to the door of the doctor’s office. “I’ll be right outside, waiting in the car.” He reassures me.

“Thanks,” I say, grateful that he didn’t try and come into the appointment with me.

It’s the first scan I’m having. At the hospital, the doctor did a blood test to find out I was pregnant, but this morning I am apparently going to be able to see the little peanut growing inside me.

I’m way more excited than I expected to be. I thought I’d be nervous.

The only thing bothering me about this appointment is that Nico isn’t here with me.

I didn’t invite him—he left it up to me to decide, and I couldn’t make up my mind. Now that I’m inside the doctor’s office, I wish I had made a different choice.

“Miss. Andreev. The doctor is a beautiful woman, around forty years old. She has a kind face, framed by gold glasses and pale pink lipstick.

“It’s Miss. Brown.” I smile.

“Oh. Ok. No, problem. I’ll just update that on the system for you—is Mr. Andreev—“ She doesn’t finish the sentence but just raises her brows at me and waits.

“He is the father, yes.” I nod. He made the appointment for me. This is apparently the best obstetrician in the city.

“Are we waiting for him?” She asks.

“No, not today.” I swallow away my regret.

“Alright, then let’s get started. Will you hop up onto the bed for me?”

She checks my blood pressure, my heart rate, and asks me a million questions. Finally, she asks me to lie down.

“You can lift your shirt up—yes—that’s great.”

Excitement tickles over me as I lift my t-shirt out of the way, and she chats while she rubs a cold gel over my stomach.

“Sorry, I should have warmed this up. You’re my first patient of the day, and this morning was a mad rush.”

“It’s ok,” I say, staring at the screen, waiting for my first glimpse of the little peanut.

She points at a white blur on the monitor and then gasps, her hand hovering above the screen.

“Is something wrong?” I ask, tense with worry.

The doctor giggles and shakes her head. “No, not at all, sorry—I didn’t mean to give you a fright—but I do have some pretty big news for you.”

“What?” I ask, my stomach knotting. “What is it?”

She moves the device over my tummy. “Let me just get a better view—“

My head is spinning with impatience. Why can’t she just tell me what she’s seen?

“Is my baby ok?” I squeal when I can’t take it anymore.

She points at the screen again. At two white blobs, the pulsing sound of heartbeats thrum through the room. “Twins.” She says happily.

“What?” I blurt out.

“Here. You can’t see much when they are this little, but there are definitely two of them. And you can hear their little hearts beating like drums.” She zooms in on the monitor and the images become clearer.

Two .

Two tiny babies.

All curled up like little beans.

“I’m having twins,” I whisper to myself.

Without any warning at all, I burst into tears.

Instead of being shocked, the doctor stands up and laughs lightheartedly.

She hands me a few tissues and reaches out to squeeze my arm. “It’s big news.” She smiles, comforting me. “Let it all out.”

While I dab at my eyes, she wipes the gel from my belly.

I sit up on the edge of her bed and pull myself together.

“Were those happy tears?” She asks, resting her hands in her lap as she looks at me.

“Yes. And—a lot of emotions. It’s just a lot—I wish—“ I stammer. “I wish Nico had been here to see it, too.” I blurt out as I start crying again.

“Oh, honey, let me print you a picture of the little nuggets so that you can take it with you and show him. I’m sure he’s going to be thrilled.”

I nod, wiping my face again, taking another deep breath.

“Alright, before you go, we need to discuss your health. With twins, your body is going to be doing twice the work. Twice the nutrients. You’ll get tired, grumpy, emotional, hungry—these are all perfectly normal things.

I have a wellness package prepared for you—it has all the multivitamins and things you need for the first trimester.

We’ll keep adding and adjusting your health routine as we move through this together.

I’m a phone call away for any questions.

If you can’t get hold of me, my assistant, Penelope, is amazing. ”

She chats on and I’m listening as best I can, but my heart, mind and soul are lost in thoughts of Nico.

He would have been so happy to be here. To see that screen, to experience this with me.

Knowing that makes me realize how much he cares. That he does love me and that everything he did—even the stupid things—was all out of love for me.

He was overprotective and controlling. But when he realized what he was doing, he stopped and apologized. He changed—he has given me all the space and freedom I wanted. He respected me in every way.

But now all I want is him.

I can raise these twins alone. Of course, I can. It’s doable. But the idea of never being with Nico again—that terrifies me.

In this moment, in this emotionally overloaded, charged moment, he is the only person in the entire world that I want.

I can’t live my life without him.

Why should I when he wants to be with me, and he has been so incredibly patient in waiting for me?

The doctor goes through the final bits and pieces of information, and I thank her when she hands me a pink and blue packet filled with my vitamins and a booklet and some pampering things.

The moment it’s over, I rush out of her office, into the waiting room, already pulling my phone from my pocket because I’m desperately excited to call Nico.

I want to tell him about the twins, and I want to tell him about my heart and what I realized.

I want to be with him.

Smiling, I flick through my phone, pushing the door open with my hip and walking out into the parking lot.

I’m about to press the dial button when I notice something strange.

The SUV is parked in the same spot.

But the driver’s door is open and there is a thick puddle of what looks like blood beneath it. Bright red, dripping from the door frame onto the tar.

Without thinking, I run to the car and yank the door all the way open.

My guard’s lifeless body tumbles out of the seat and I scream as I leap aside, dodging it and hearing a dull thud as it smacks into the floor. There is a long, wide gouge on his throat. Blood is bubbling from it in a slow river.

I scream again, panic engulfing every cell in my body as I stagger backwards, tripping, expecting to fall hard onto the tarred parking lot—but instead I fall into someone’s arms and immediately a gloved hand wraps around my mouth, cutting off the next scream that wanted to spill from my lips.

They drag me, kicking, fighting, and punching, backwards towards a van that’s pulled up behind us. The person lifts me easily off the ground and into the van. It’s dark inside, and more hands grab at me, tugging me away from the door—the door slams closed, and darkness blinds me.

“Go, drive dammit. Get out of here.” Someone shouts.

Tires squeal and the van jerks forward.