Page 17

The most difficult part was leaving her locked up in the penthouse when I left this morning.

She was still sleeping, exhausted from the overwhelming surge of emotion she had to suffer last night.

I’m furious with myself.

The worst part is that I finally have to admit that no matter what I did, regardless of her finding this discrepancy or not, eventually I would have had to let her go, or tell her who I really am.

There was no escaping the truth. It would have come out in the end.

I would’ve preferred to tell her a different way. Though on my own terms.

Traffic this morning is thicker than usual, and I’m agitated to the point of lashing out at someone for no reason. My usually calm demeanor is buried beneath the anger I have towards myself.

Anger because I might have lost her forever.

She’s furious at me.

Will she ever forgive me?

Can she love me for who I am?

I fell in love with you, but you aren’t even you.

Her words have played over and over again in my mind, like a record stuck, looping, repeating. I fell in love with you , but you aren’t even you

She loves me.

Perhaps not anymore.

After sitting in traffic for too long, I pull up outside the warehouse, where I’ve called everyone to meet this morning. My brothers are all here, along with the Kuznetsov brothers.

Everyone knows what happened—now we are going to try and find a way to solve this, as quickly and effectively as possible.

I’m the last one to walk in, but the guys are still busy getting their coffee and settling down, so at least I didn’t hold the entire meeting up.

I take a seat and wait for everyone to fall silent.

“Did everyone read the report?” I ask, looking around the table.

They nod, some saying yes, some staying silent.

“That is the entire amount that has been transferred to the Orlov account. The first transaction took place on the seventeenth of July last year, so just over six months ago—that means that someone has been inside my building, working with my staff, for over six months.”

“Have you pulled employee records to see who was hired during that time, give or take a few months?” Rodion asks.

I nod. “We have. There are five suspects and they have been pulled from the building and taken to a more private location for questioning. Two of them I’m sure are not involved, but I don’t want to take any risks, so they are all being treated as suspects.”

“You’re keeping the process clean for now, though, right?” Luka asks.

“Completely. It’s being treated as an interview for a new position in the company.

The guy conducting the interview is high profile—he used to work undercover for some major government organization.

Anyway, he will be able to quickly suss out who to focus on.

The pressure to get answers will only increase once we’ve narrowed down the target. ”

“Okay, so that solves the issue of finding out who the rat is—how do we deal with the family? Ivan has literally stolen millions from us at this point. Our response should be severe. It should send a message, loud and clear,” Rigor says sternly.

The Kuznetsovs are a brutal family, powerful and dangerous. My family can be vicious when needed, but our reputation does not match the Kuznetsov brothers. Perhaps it’s time for us to change that.

I can certainly understand the need to tear the world apart when someone you love with your entire being is under threat.

My throat tightens when I imagine them finding Sera.

I can’t think like that. She’s safe. She’s in my penthouse. They can’t get to her.

“The girl who found it—where is she?” Roman asks, his hand resting on the table.

“She’s safe,” I say. “Why?”

“She might be a target.”

“I know. But I will make sure nothing happens to her.”

“She can be moved to one of the safehouses until this is over.”

“No. She stays with me,” I snap, not willing to budge on this.

Radmir's eyes narrow towards me. “Are you involved with her on a personal level?” he asks, tilting his head to the side.

“That’s irrelevant,” I answer.

“It’s not. You being involved with her puts her in more danger—you have to know that, right?” He’s not attacking me in any way, but I don’t like what he’s saying.

I huff out a deep breath. “We are not here to discuss my relationship status. We are here to find a solution for the rival family that is fucking with us.”

A moment of tense silence washes over the meeting before Rodion says.

“Okay, I think the best way forward is to wait for the interviews to finish so that we have the mole. Once that’s done, we can start questioning him properly on location and contact points for the Orlov family.

With that information, we’ll be able to plot out a safe attack plan. ”

“What if none of them is the rat?” Yilian asks.

“Then we keep looking.”

***

By the end of the meeting, we have a rough plan for how we want to move against Ivan once we have his location and any inside information.

Everyone begins to filter away from the warehouse, leaving one by one. I want to rush home to her, but I’m fully aware she wants nothing to do with me right now. It fucking hurts to know that.

“Hey man, you doing okay?” Radmir asks, noticing my tension.

“Yeah, just a lot going on.”

“That girl—she obviously means a lot to you.”

“She does,” I nod.

“I know it’s not what you want to hear, but maybe you should consider letting her go. Breaking up with her, I mean, for her own safety.”

My entire body goes rigid, as though someone has pierced ice into my heart.

“No,” I snap instantly.

“Look, I was just saying—“ Radmir raises his hands defensively.

“No,” I say again, this time with less aggression. “I can’t let her go, man. I care about her too much.”

Radmir nods, pulling his mouth tight, and when I look into his eyes, I can see that he understands.

“We’ll help you keep her safe, then. We’ll figure this out, okay? And if anything happens—if you need backup at any point—call.”

“I will. Thanks, man,” I say, filled with relief.

He walks away, and I follow him out to my car. Even if she doesn’t want to talk to me, I can at least be around for her.

Maybe she’s calmed down enough to have a conversation.

The drive home is long and slow. I think I’m making it that way on purpose because my mind is so busy, and I want it to clear before I get to her. But it won’t be clear until the danger is gone.

The conversation with Radmir has left me with a very alarming understanding of where my heart is.

I never want to let her go.

I never want to lose Serafina.

She belongs at my side, in my life, with me.

Losing her will tear me apart.

I push the front door open and step inside, my ears attuned to every sound, but there are none. The quiet hum of the fridge, the heating, the wind against the windows—but other than that, I hear nothing.

“Sera?” I call out, closing the door behind me.

I hear her sigh.

Then her footsteps as she walks through the penthouse towards me.

“Did you have a good day?” I ask, and as soon as the question is out of my mouth, I regret it.

She rolls her eyes and tightens her mouth. “Oh, it was amazing. Stunning. Lovely. Thanks for asking.”

“Sorry,” I mutter, feeling like a fool. “Can we talk?”

“About what? Shall we go over everything that happened? How did you trick me into working for your company, which is actually a money laundering business for the mafia? Do you want to talk about that? Or maybe you want to talk about how you’ve been taking me to these lovely places, spoiling me and treating me like a queen, but it’s all with money made through criminal activities?

Blood money? Have you murdered people, Nico?

Are you a killer? Who are you? What are you capable of?

Is anything that you told me real?” She’s so angry she’s got his fists clenched into tight balls at her sides.

Her neck is tense and the muscles across her jaw are pulling tightly.

Her eyes are flooded with dark rage, and if she could, she’d be shooting daggers from her eyes, straight into my heart.

I’ve hurt her.

I’ve hurt her so badly that I’m not sure it’s repairable.

“Sera, we can talk about all of it. You can ask me anything. I don’t want to hide anything from you anymore.”

“Anymore.” She snorts with laughter and tilts her head back. “What a relief. Except how can I trust a single word that comes out of your mouth, Nico?”

“I care about you more than you could understand. I was trying to protect you.”

She shakes her head.

“I don’t know how it works in your world, Nico, but in the world I live in, people don’t lie to the people they care about.”

The tears that are shining on her cheeks sparkle like shards of glass. It’s painful to watch, and I’m fighting every muscle in my body.

I want to pull her into my arms and hold her.

I want to bury my words inside her head until she understands what she means to me. How can I force her to know how I feel?

I want to tell her that I love her.

But after last night, I believe it will do nothing other than make things worse. Much worse.

We stand in painful silence for a long time. She doesn’t take her eyes off me.

Finally, I give in, unable to control myself—I step forward and grab her into a tight embrace.

She squirms and hits my chest with her fist, so I hold tighter.

She shouts at me, demanding that I let her go, but I don’t.

She swears and shouts and hits at me until she goes limp in my arms, her energy drained, her sobbing tears all that’s left.

I thread my fingers through her hair, cupping her head in my hand as I hold her against me. I kiss the top of her head and tell her over and over again, “I will make this right, Serafina. I’m not giving up on us. I’m going to prove to you that it wasn’t fake. You know me. You know who I am .”

She cries harder; her heart is shattered, and it’s my fault.

I made her fall in love with me. And then I told her the truth.

I’m a monster, and I probably don’t deserve her love. But I had it, and I want it again.

“I will fix everything,” I whisper, making her a promise.

When I finally let her go, she steps away from me without a word, without a heated glare of anger, and without hate in her eyes.

She looks numb.

I take her hand and lead her to the kitchen, sitting her down in the high chair beneath the counter.

“I’ll make us an early dinner. Do you want hot chocolate?”

She pushes away from the chair, standing up and sighing softly.

“I ate while you were out today,” she says calmly. “I’ll be in the room if you need me.”

I read straight through her words to the truth of what she’s saying.

She doesn’t want to be around me.

She can’t look at me.

She would leave the moment I opened that door and not look back.

I watch her walk away from me while I stand there fighting my own emotions, fighting my own heartache. But at the same time, I make that promise again, silent, weighing it into my soul.

I will fix this, and I will win her back, no matter what it takes.