Page 16 of If the Stars Align
“I’m sorry, Mia. You’re my best friend, and I want to tell you everything…but being an open book doesn’t come naturally to everyone.”
The idea of showing people who I am terrifies me. If they don’t like what they see, will they leave me? With no family in the picture besides my mom, I can hardly afford to find out.
“If you’d told me about Dex, I could have been there for you, Sunny.”
“Mia, there’s nothing to tell! Dex and I are friends, and that’s all we’ll ever be. He’s dated plenty of girls in our class. If he really wanted to, he could have dated me.”
It’s the most honest thing I’ve said in a long time.
“Sunny, have you noticed that Dex has never asked a girl out himself? He says yes when they ask, probably because he doesn’t want to hurt their feelings, but he’sneverthe one to initiate. And the girls who ask him out never get past a few dates.” Mia tilts her head. “Why do you think that is?”
Of course I’ve noticed. I just never let myself read into it. If Mia has a theory, I’d like to hear her say it. “Why doyouthinkthat is?” I ask, my gaze shying away from hers.
“Because he’s been waiting foryou, silly!” she says, laughing.
I look into her eyes. “You don’t know that. Do you?”
Mia’s grin fades when she shakes her head. “I’ve never talked to him about it, I swear. I know you wouldn’t want me to. But I thinkyoushould. Maybe tonight’s too soon after your breakup, but…it’s just something to think about.”
“I’ve really missed him, Mia,” I confess. “We lost touch over the past few months, and I want him back in my life. No matter what that looks like.”
Mia takes hold of my hands. “Well, let’s get in there,” she says, nodding across the street. “And just remember, I’m here if you need me.”
When we’re out of the car, Mia looks me up and down. Despite my nerves, I feel confident that I picked a really good outfit. I’m wearing a black, form-fitting shirt and a short floral skirt.
Mia grins. “Dex is gonnadiewhen he sees you.”
As we make our way inside, Mia gets pulled into a game of “Never Have I Ever,” but not before making sure I’ll be okay without her. I set her free and, before she runs off, she winks at me. On my own, I take a minute to survey the room. The house is crowded as hell, and pretty dark too, but it doesn’t surprise me that the first face I register belongs to Oliver Dexter.
He’s standing in the middle of a crowd, telling a story. All eyes are on him and—I can tell—he’s loving every second of it. He looks so confident, so at ease, sohappy, he’s practically glowing. When he delivers the punchline, everyone bursts into laughter. I turn away, my pulse racing, my throat dry, wondering if comingto this party was a big mistake.
Dex seems to be doing perfectly fine without me in his life.
My eyes dart to the front door.If I leave now, he’ll never even know I was here.
I spot Mia across the room, laughing among a group of girls that includes Jenna Andersen’s three best friends but, to my relief, Jenna isn’t with them. I’m about to tell Mia that I developed a migraine and need to call a cab, when I feel someone’s hand on my waist.
“Sunny? Is that you?”
I know immediately who’s behind me. It’s like time stops when he touches me.
I spin around. “Dex,” I whisper. And when I see the way his eyes light up as he looks at me, the tightness in my chest eases. I can breathe.
“God, I missed you,” he says, pulling me into his arms. The world around us fades, and we’re the only two people in the room now.
I bury my face in the crook between his neck and shoulder. “We were supposed to talk every day,” I say, my eyes stinging.
Dex pulls back to look at me, but keeps his hands on my waist. “I know. I’m so sorry, Sunny, I have no idea what I was thinking. I guess I figured I should give you some space. You told me you were dating someone, and I didn’t want to get in the way?—”
Despite myself, I laugh.
Dex’s brow furrows. “What?” he asks.
“Nothing, it’s just…it’s a moot point now. That relationship is over.”
Dex half-smiles.God, I missed that.
“It’s really hard beingso far away,” I say.
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