Page 24

I nod quietly, walking into the hall with its tiered seating and take a seat.

On a screen to the front, a big ‘Welcome Back’ PowerPoint is up there decorated with balloons and confetti.

I try to be discreet and take a seat with Beth, waiting for the buzz of people to calm down.

At the front of the hall is Alicia, the school’s executive headteacher.

I don’t know why they’ve messed around with senior leadership titles but I always expect these executive heads to carry briefcases.

Beth has told me stories about Alicia – that someone saw a sleeping bag in her office once and she’s never seen her in casual wear – but I quite like the big statement jewellery and the fact that all her deputies and associate leaders below her seem to be men.

A silence descends on the room as she steps to the front in her nude heels and suit.

‘So…we are back. Hello, everyone. I won’t keep you. We have a busy week ahead of us and everything you need to know will be in the staff bulletin, but I just wanted to welcome the new members of staff. We have ten new members of staff joining us…’

I sit up in my chair, realising that I will be singled out in a minute. Movement in teaching these days is the norm, we are all moving to new schools to get promoted, to find a working ethos that fits. I never thought I’d be one of those people but here I am. One of the ten.

‘Let’s start with maths.’ Crumbs, there are slides with our names.

People stand up and wave as their names are announced.

I really hope we don’t have to say anything.

No. Just standing and waving. I can do that.

She gets through English, Science and Geography – the new teacher of which tells us he has a speech prepared. Alicia tells him to sit down.

‘And moving on to Modern Foreign Languages. We have Suzie Callaghan who is with us after a relocation from Brighton.’ Shit, that’s me.

I stand up and put a hand to the air whilst Beth claps and lets out a little whoop.

‘For those wondering, she is the cousin of the other Miss Callaghan, which is lovely. And Charlie Shaw joining us from a school in West London.’

I was told about this. He’s a last-minute hire.

We haven’t had the chance to meet because of this but we’ve both been added to the MFL Team and I know he likes a thumbs up emoji.

I didn’t really have the time to stalk him.

I look around the room, curious to see who I’ll be working alongside.

A figure to the side of the room stands up.

‘Come on, turn around so we can see you,’ Alicia tells him.

He turns around.

What the actual.

FUCK.

I don’t quite know what sound comes out of my mouth next but I yelp as we stand there, staring at each other.

Beth sits up when she finds him then looks at me, her head swinging back and forth between us.

Is this a prank? A really awful cruel prank?

He puts a hand to the air to wave at me. I wave back.

It’s him. Carlos?

Charlie

‘And this is the staffroom. Don’t worry about that large stain. It looks like someone died there but it was from when Jan on reception dropped a vat of mulled wine at Christmas. I also bake every Friday. It’s brownies this week,’ my school guide and staff buddy, Ed from Biology, tells me.

‘You bake? For the whole faculty? That’s impressive,’ I tell him.

He laughs. ‘Oh, it’s first come, first served, and if and when my daughter allows for it,’ he says.

‘How old?’ I ask, politely.

‘She’s one. Her name is Daisy. I’m going to be unbearable now and show you a picture.

’ He beams so hard that I can’t deny him and he holds up an adorable selfie of him, a very curly haired baby, someone I’ll assume is his wife and a ginger cat who looks less impressed. ‘That’s Mia – she works in English.’

‘Well, that is super cute.’

‘And you? Married? Kids?’ he asks.

‘It’s complicated, but single for now.’ He leads me down a staircase so we can head to a briefing in the main hall and I can get a feel for this new school I’m going to call home.

I would like to say it’s different but all these London schools feel the same.

They’re hybrids of new fancy wooden-clad buildings with flash technology and old blocks from the seventies that hide asbestos and flaking concrete.

‘So, if you don’t mind me asking, what made you want to move on?’ he asks, trying to strike up a conversation. You seem nice and all, Ed, but I don’t think we’re far enough down the line to tell you the ‘cock-sock’ story.

‘You know, the academy system isn’t great – it’s all money and results-driven and I just wanted another challenge,’ I tell him earnestly.

He nods and leads me into the hall with its pristine parquet floors and tiered seating.

We seem to have snuck in through the back door and the head has already started her spiel so we take some seats to the side.

Oh, they’re introducing new staff. That’ll be me then.

I only had my interview on the last day of the summer term so it all feels a little rushed but, hey, at least I wore my good shirt.

‘And moving on to Modern Foreign Languages. We have Suzie Callaghan who is with us after a relocation from Brighton.’ I was told there was another new starter in the department but I haven’t met her yet.

We’d been added to a lot of groups where I contributed to the conversations with a thumbs up, just to show I was paying attention.

I’ve not been told much about her but I hope she’s relatively young and will let me steal her pens.

I look around for her and turn my head to the person standing at the back of the room.

Holy fuck.

I turn around again.

No.

Hold up.

‘For those wondering, she is the cousin of the other Miss Callaghan which is lovely.’ Cousins?

I know her cousins. They’re also here? What sort of a twisted ambush is this?

I hold on to Ed’s shoulder who is a bit disconcerted by the physical contact and lean over to see the person cheering on her announcement is Beth. I’ve met her. What the…

‘And Charlie Shaw joining us from a school in West London.’

I can just stay seated. I’ll just put a hand in the air. Can I crawl out of here?

‘That’s you, I believe,’ Ed tells me.

‘It is.’ I stand up and face the front so she won’t be able to see me.

‘Come on, turn around so we can see you,’ Alicia tells me.

I turn slowly and look up, and she’s the first face I see. I’m overwhelmed with relief, fear and just plain confusion. She looks at me and does a strange yelping noise like a surprised bird. And I wave.

Hey. It’s her. Aurelie.

‘So, call me stupid, but do you two know each other? It felt like you knew each other,’ our head of Modern Foreign Languages, Lee, asks both of us as we convene at the front of the room.

I sat down after my name was announced and didn’t dare look back for fear I might turn to stone.

That is her, isn’t it? I know I took quite a large knock to the head in Mallorca but I’ve been given the all-clear and the wrist is better.

Maybe there was a brain bleed and she’s a hallucination.

But as the briefing finished and Alicia had introduced all the new-starters, I turned to see her staring at me and really not looking very impressed at all.

Seriously? And now, here we are, standing literally a metre away from each other. There’s no mistake – it is her.

‘No,’ Suzie says. ‘I just thought he looked familiar. Like someone from my yoga class, strangely enough…’ She looks me directly in the eye as she says it.

‘Do you do yoga, Charlie?’ Lee asks, surprised, in his lilting Welsh accent. ‘You don’t look the sort.’

‘I don’t. Sorry, I felt the same, some strange feeling of déjà vu? Have you ever lived in Nice?’ I ask her.

‘No,’ she replies, a little too sternly.

Lee looks back and forth between us, trying to work out the vibe. ‘Well, I am excited for the year ahead. I know you’re both super new so do come and talk to me if there are any problems and maybe we should have a little meeting after school? We can meet in room C2?’

‘Of course, look forward to it,’ I say.

‘Sure thing,’ Suzie says, before he walks away and we’re left standing there in front of each other, both of us at a loss for words.

After what feels like a lifetime of staring at each other, she mumbles, ‘Are you real? ’

A teacher walks past us, ‘Welcome to Griffin Road, guys!’ We both smile then return to our face-off.

‘Your name isn’t Carlos?’ she asks.

‘Well, at least it’s the Spanish version of Charles. Aurelie is nothing like Suzie,’ I say, slightly angry that she’s accusing me of lying to her.

‘She was my French penpal when I was ten,’ she blurts out.

I laugh in response but she doesn’t take that well.

She takes my arm and I try to ignore the feel of her hand on me as she leads me to a corner of the room.

The other teachers continue to filter out of the hall.

She leans in whispering into my ear, unfeasibly close to me…

‘This isn’t funny. This is a disaster. You… You lied.’

‘So did you. Actually, your whole family lied to me. I know that cousin you were sitting with. Were you all just laughing at me?’ I tell her.

She covers her blushing cheeks and mouth with her hands.

‘I can’t believe this. I really…how is this happening?

Are you hot? Is this school hot, or is it me?

’ She runs a finger under her collar and I follow it, looking at the curve of her neck.

Yeah, maybe now’s not the time. ‘How are we going to play this? We’re in the same department, we’re literally going to see each other every day. I’ll just quit. I’m so embarrassed.’

My disbelief turns to resignation. Something this ridiculous would only happen to me.

I try and put a hand out to calm her down but she moves away immediately, looking around to check who may be watching.

She stops sharply to look at me. ‘How the hell are we going to have this meeting? How can I look you in the face?’

And then resignation turns to sadness. Is she ashamed of what happened?

Did she just want to leave it there on that island?

Because I think about it daily. Not the sex.

I mean, I think about the sex a fair bit.

But I also think of a moment where two people met for the first time by the sea.

I can hear the sea, feel the breeze on my face, and smell the salt.

I vividly hold that image in my mind of this little sea nymph and her big brown eyes, her hair clinging to her face, pulling my T-shirt down so I wouldn’t be able to see, making ridiculous jokes about my nipples and rolling in the sand.

And now that sea nymph is here in a sensible midi dress and that memory clearly hasn’t stayed with her the way it has with me.

‘You’re looking me in the face, right now,’ I tell her.

‘Car… Charlie… we’ve done stuff…’ she whispers.

I smirk and she hits me on the arm. An art teacher walks past looking very confused.

‘This is not professional. This is our first day and look, I need this job,’ she informs me.

‘Really? But what about your family champagne empire?’ I snap back.

Her jaw goes slack as she stares me right in the eye. Maybe I was wrong about her. In Mallorca, I got warm and funny. I’m now getting cold and sarcastic.

‘You were the one who didn’t show up? The one who stood me up,’ she tells me.

‘I had a valid excuse.’

‘Did you get stuck in a yoga pose?’ she retorts.

I stop before this gets any more barbed. I don’t know what to tell her.

I spent two days in hospital and when I was discharged, I went straight to that villa to look for her because she was all I could think about.

Except she wasn’t there. There was a German man at the gate in gold budgie smugglers who invited me in for ‘party times’ but I politely declined.

And I tried my darndest to look for her.

I trawled through every Aurelie from Nice on Facebook, and I shed tears as my plane was taking off from Mallorca knowing I’d lost her. I told Max it was indigestion.

‘Hi!’ I tear my gaze from her face to see the people who’ve appeared next to us.

One of them is my tour guide, Ed, and the other I recognise from the screensaver on his phone.

She grins. ‘I just thought I’d come and introduce myself.

I’m Mia. I know Beth.’ She points to the other side of the room where Beth stands, knowing to keep her distance.

She keeps looking at me like she’s seen a ghost.

‘Nice to meet you, Mia,’ I say, putting a hand out that she shakes animatedly.

‘Suzie,’ she says, still a little hot and flustered.

Mia notices it and puts an arm to her. ‘I hate it when they do those staff introductions too. Making you stand up in front of everyone like a muppet.’

‘Oh, it wasn’t…I mean…’ Suzie fumbles.

‘Can I say though? It’s brilliant to have some younger teachers in the school. Ed and I were trying to work out when the next gen were coming through. And which languages?’

‘Spanish?’ I say putting a hand to the air. ‘I think Suzie may be…French?’

‘Yeah,’ she says, catching my eye and half smiling.

‘Well, let’s see what cunning linguists you both are, eh?’ she cackles at her own joke. Ed closes his eyes in embarrassment. Suzie and I don’t react. At all. Not one little bit.