Page 36 of Hot Four Teacher (The Lawson’s #4)

Chapter thirty-five

All I Want

Michelle

I ’m going to kill Ronnie.

Just agree with things he likes so you have something in common.

Why on Earth did I listen to her?

If I wouldn’t have, I wouldn’t be in the passenger’s seat of Dane’s truck, going God knows where. I thought about coming clean, but he seemed so excited. Plus, telling him I lied might not be the best of ideas.

Maybe I can learn to like the outdoors. It’s worth a shot, right?

Truth be told, it’s not even the outdoors that I don’t like. It’s the exhausting outdoor activities.

We finally get to our destination–which seems to be in the middle of nowhere. Dane pulled off into some grass on the side of a dirt road.

Where the hell are we?

Before walking around to open my door, he grabs a couple of bags out of the back. I have no idea what’s in them, but I’m sure I’m about to find out.

When he opens my door, I take his hand and continue to hold it as she leads me through a thicket of trees. Once through, I can see where we are.

We are on a river bank that has a long dock that goes out into the water. On the dock, there are a couple of chairs, a cooler, and a large umbrella. And in the water, a giant inflated inner tube floats on the surface.

“What is this?” I ask. “I thought we were going hiking.”

“Baby, it doesn’t take a genius to figure out that hiking isn’t your thing. I figured I would do something a little more fun for you.”

“You did this for me?” I ask, completely stunned.

He leans over to kiss me on the cheek. “Don’t get too excited. It’s nothing fancy.”

He leads me closer to the water while I ask, “When did you have time to do this?”

“I got up early and drove out here.”

“And I didn’t even notice you were gone?” I ask.

“You were sleeping pretty hard.”

“Well, that’s because you fucked the shit out of me and practically put me into a coma.”

He smiles. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

We get to the dock, and Dane sets everything down to get situated.

“I didn’t bring a swimsuit,” I tell him.

“That’s alright. This place is pretty secluded. You can get away with your tank top and shorts or even your bra and panties.” He looks around while adding. “I hope this is okay. This is probably the last warm weekend for a while, and it’s way warmer than usual.”

“I think it’s really nice.”

Twenty minutes later, I’m lounging on the giant inner tube that’s tethered to the dock, so I don’t float away.

I look over at Dane who is sitting on a folding chair with a fishing pole in hand.

He’s rocking a backwards baseball cap and aviator sunglasses.

I stare at his large biceps and chest that are covered in tattoos.

He must feel my eyes on him because he turns to me and asks, “You okay?”

“Just admiring how sexy you are,” I say honestly.

“Oh, baby, I do that to you constantly.” He flashes me a coy grin.

How did I get here? Twenty-four hours ago, I was denying all my feelings for this man. Now, I can’t imagine being anywhere else.

I love my daughter, and I love my life as a mom, but for the first time in I can’t remember how long, I feel like more than a mom. I feel like someone is doing something for me. It’s a little foreign, but I’m learning to enjoy it.

After I get too hot for my tank top, I yank it off over my head and toss it at Dane. It lands on his face.

Chuckling, he removes it and sets it on the dock next to him.

“You’re feisty today, aren’t you?” He asks.

“Yes. Why don’t you hand me one of the fishing poles?”

He stares at me in disbelief. “ You want to fish?”

“Yes. But you have to put the worm on. Those things are gross.”

I watch as he threads a worm on the hook of the extra pole and then hands it to me.

I take it and say, “Look, I’m a fisherman. Fisher-woman? Fisher-person? Whatever.”

“A woman after my own heart.” He smiles.

I get lost in a trance as I watch the surface of the water. Everything is so calm and peaceful…until it’s not.

All of a sudden, something grabs my hook and starts pulling hard.

“Oh, my gosh!” I cry. “I’ve got something.”

“Okay, baby, just reel it in slow and steady.”

While that sounds like a good idea in theory, this fish on my line has other plans. It’s tugging as hard as it can. I hold on as tightly as I’m able to. It finally dies down a little, and I’m able to reel it in a little with Dane coaching me.

I think I’m making decent progress when without warning, it yanks me so hard it has me flying out of the tube and into the water. My head bobs below the surface, and when I come up, I see Dane already in the water beside me.

“Let go, baby,” he says. “Let go of the pole.”

I do and whatever has a hold of it sends it zipping through the water. Moving toward him, I wrap my body around his, holding on for dear life.

“Are you okay?” He asks, effortlessly holding me while treading water.

“Uh, yeah. I think so, but after feeling what was on the other end of that fishing pole, I think I’d like to get out of the water now.”

“Good point. Let’s go.”

***

Dane hands me a steaming cup of coffee and joins me on the couch. We get comfy under a blanket. Between that and the fireplace he just lit, everything is quite cozy.

I look down at the steam rising off the mug. “I’m sorry I’m not very good at all of the outdoor stuff. I guess I’m more of an indoor type of gal.”

“Hey, look at me.”

Slowly, my eyes travel upward to find his.

“Now, I want you to listen to me,” he begins. “I don’t care if you aren’t good at the outdoor stuff. I meant what I said about not caring what we do as long as we’re together. If I want to go fishing, I can do it on a day that you’re with Eve. I’m just sorry you didn’t have a good time today.”

I give him a small smile. “It wasn’t all bad. It was sweet of you to get everything set up.”

We sip our coffee for a few minutes before he asks, “Do you think Eve is having a good time with her dad?”

I sigh. “I hope so, but honestly, I have no idea. I haven’t gotten any frantic calls, so I guess that’s a good sign.”

“You’ve told me about your relationship with your ex. What’s Eve’s relationship with him like?”

“Complicated,” I answer. “He’s always been in her life for short spans at a time. He comes in and out as he pleases, buys her things, and texts with her like one of her friends.”

“That must be hard…on both of you.”

“When she was little, it was worse. She’d fall for all of his big promises and would be devastated when he wouldn’t follow through.

It was heartbreaking to watch every single time.

Now that she’s older, she takes everything he says with a grain of salt.

I do give her credit for going this week, though. ”

“What do you mean?” He asks between sips.

“Her dad has a new girlfriend, and he wanted Eve to come over this week. This is a big deal because one, he’s never brought his girlfriend around, and two, she’s never stayed with him for more than a night.”

“Are you worried?”

“Maybe a little, but she’ll call if she needs me.” I say the words and try to act calmer than I feel.

“I may have only been teaching and coaching Eve for a few weeks, but I can already tell she’s a tough cookie.”

“Oh, yes. She’s very stubborn and bull-headed.”

He smiles. “Wonder where she gets that from.”

Looking as innocent as possible, I reply, “I have absolutely no idea.”

I stretch out on the couch next to him, putting my feet in his lap. “Dane?”

“Yes, beautiful?”

“Tell me about your time in The Marines.” I figure it’s a risk asking him again since the last time I did, he avoided the question like the plague. But I want to get to know him better.

All of him.

I figure he’s going to move the conversation away from the topic, so I’m fairly surprised when he starts talking.

“Well, my dad was in the service for over twenty years. It was his whole life. He always wanted the same for me, but it never interested me all that much. I wanted to be a teacher. Then, my mom got sick and eventually passed. Her medical bills left little to no money for college, and I wasn’t a good enough student to warrant a scholarship, so I joined to get help paying for school. ”

He pauses to take a drink. “I immediately regretted it because I met Cassie. We were so crazy about each other, and it was hard to leave.”

“Do you still regret it?” I ask.

“Maybe a little, but not for the same reasons.”

“What do you mean?”

“If I hadn’t joined, honestly, Cassie and I probably would’ve never gotten married.

We rushed into it because I was going to deploy.

I was gone so much that it took us way too long to see that we weren’t right for each other, so I guess that part was unfortunate.

But on the good side, I met men who became my brothers and would like to think I did some good while I was in. ”

Before I can say anything, he continues, “Michelle, I’m crazy about you, and I want us to get to know each other as much as possible.

That being said, there are things I did over there–things I had to do–that I don’t want to talk about.

It’s nothing against you. Believe me. But when I got back, my head was a mess.

I was pretty fucked up, so I went to therapy.

It took some time, but I came to terms with everything.

I dealt with it all and found a way to move on and live a good life.

If I start talking about details, it’s going to open up old wounds, and I really don’t want to go back to that headspace. ”

I look at his face and see worry written all over his features. He’s scared that I’m going to be upset, or that I’m going to push for him to tell me more.

He adds, “I’m sorry. I don’t want this to be an issue between us. It always was between Cassie and me.”

Well, I’ve got news for him. I’m not Cassie.

Instead of saying anything, I throw the blanket off of us and hook one leg over his lap, so I’m straddling him. I wrap my arms around his neck and pull him close. It doesn’t take long for him to hug me back, burying his face in my neck. I can feel his body relax against mine.

I’ve never been very good at comforting people. I’m usually more awkward than anything, but that’s also because I don’t get close to anyone.

I feel different with Dane. I want to be close to him.

That’s all I want right now.