Page 168 of His Trick

“Who the fuck am I?”

My fists slammed into the steering wheel, pounding harder into the frame until I felt the skin break under the abuse. Xanthy’s phone was sitting in the passenger seat, and I screamed as loud as I could to the fucking sky.

“Who am I, Carrington? What have you created? Does your fucking monster have a name?”

Silence.

No fucking answer from anyone.

I was alone.

I kicked the dashboard, and the glove compartment popped open.

My chest constricted with a bitter laugh when I saw the glint of the metal beckoning me.

“Of course.” I grabbed the blade tucked inside.

My own name shone back at me, and Carrington’s blood flashed on its steel surface.

The monster is…me.

There’s no use fighting it, Sunshine…

The words were an echo in my head, making me pocket the knife and leading me, like a ghost, through the cornfield out to the cabin by the beautiful lake that looked like glass under the pouring rain.

It was fitting our story would lead me back to this place. It’s where his kills were buried, and where I buried him. Likely thousands of bodies eternally rested at the end of its depths.

“Am I any different than your other victims, Care Bear?” I muttered, walking into the shallow water.

It felt cold on my bare feet, and I breathed in a sigh of relief, looking at the sky and letting the rain wash over me, ridding me of every single emotion until I felt nothing but a numb clarity.

“This is our fucked-up story. It’s always how this ends, isn’t it?” I continued, wading deeper in the water, letting the weight of the lake pull me further under.

“There is no escaping you...”

My laugh was bitter, and the thunder responded with a rumble that shook me to my core.

“I’ve always been yours, Carrington Harding. Always. Just another fucking body for you to bury under the waves.”

As I got farther and farther into the lake, I could feel his warmth guiding me. The light I always denied that he had.

Now it was all I could see. I sought that warmth, walking until I felt the waterline hit my shoulders.

“You win, Care Bear. I can’t fight anymore, and honestly, I don’t want to. I tried so hard to hold on, but I was never meant to live in the light, was I? Monsters belong in the dark. I belong with you.”

I pulled my knife from my pocket, swallowing hard as I traced my name with my fingertips, the very name that took him away.

Now it will end.

“This is me, Carrington. No masks, no illusions. There is no light or darkness. It’s just me, Shiloh Anderson. Your damning creation is ready to rest with my master.”

The sting of the blade cut deep as I pressed it harder into my skin, watching my blood spill and leak down the long lines I created from my wrists to my forearms.

“I’m ready to stop fighting, baby,” I said, tears streaming down my face as the water around me turned crimson. I forced myself to go deeper into the lake, feeling his essence the deeper I went.

He was here with me, guiding me further.

Time to let go, Sunshine. You’ve always been mine.

I began to sink, finally accepting the darkness inside me, staring at the rain pelting down, and succumbing to him.

“You were right all along,” I said to the sky, feeling my body slowly submerge as the red water darkened. “There’s no use in fighting because…in the end…”

The storm consumed us both.

THE END