Page 157 of His Trick

“No!” I used all the strength I had to jerk away from Xanthy’s body.

It was reflex, panic, pure adrenaline, and absolute devastation. Carrington went quiet. The sounds of our struggle were muted, and his dark eyes looked right through me.

The knife.

Where is the knife?

And then I saw it sticking out of Carrington’s stomach. His white shirt, speckled with bright red, suddenly turned a deep crimson.

His eyes widened as he reached for the knife embedded in his flesh.

No. God, please no.

The warmth hit my hands before my mind could process it. His breath hitched. “Shiloh…I wanted you to see…”

I froze, unable to stop myself from watching my hands drip with the deep red of his life.

All the heat, panic, and disbelief collided into a scream ripping free of my throat.

“Carrington…no…no…please…fuck. Why did you have to do that? Fuck! No, fuck! Stay with me! Don’t you fucking dare leave me, asshole!”

He coughed as I scrambled to gather him in my arms before he dropped to the ground. His voice was wet and rasping, and he shook against me.

“I…wanted…you to see…the truth…I needed you to…choose…me…why couldn’t you…love me…too.”

Tears streamed down my face. My sobs wracked my chest.

“I…I can’t lose you. Carrington, why did you do this? Fuck! Don’t you dare leave me. I do choose you, you fucking asshole. I can’t be without you. I love you.”

His fingers brushed my cheek. A ghost of a smile on his gray lips as the color drained from his beautiful face, and the red continued to soak his body, stealing the light in his eyes.

“You…were…always…my light…I’m sorry I couldn’t…let go of…my darkness…darkness…needs…light…I need…you.”

I pressed him closer, frantically shaking and fumbling to staunch the bleeding I had caused. My hands were useless, and the blood pooled everywhere, soaking everything. My body trembled, my heart threatening to shatter in my chest.

“Please…stay…I can’t…I can’t survive this. I need you, Carrington. I need all of you.”

His eyelids fluttered. Weakly, he reached for me, pulling me to his cold lips one last time.

“Shiloh…I…love…you…my Sunshine…forgive….me…”

The sound tore me apart.

My lips pressed to his, rocking him, sobbing into him, desperately kissing him, willing my life to transfer to him.

I cried harder than I ever had.

My tears dripped onto his face.

I felt the moment his soul left his body.

I felt the second his warmth left him completely. I cried harder, unable to look away from his beautiful, unseeing eyes. Every second stretched unbearably.

I had killed him.

The man I loved more than anything. I fucking killed him. I killed…

Xanthy was on the ground beside the altar…the fucking tether to the light I so desperately needed…for what…