Page 17

CHAPTER TEN

“ I know you are not asleep,” Lysander said with a deep sigh as he walked to the edge of Aurelia’s bed. “If you were, Aurelia, I would be able to hear you snoring by now.”

“I do not snore!”

He chuckled. “See, I told you that you were not sleeping.”

Despite the way that his daughters were feeling about him at the moment, Lysander wasn’t about to miss his nightly tradition of seeing them turn in for bed.

That they were angry with him, he had no doubt.

Hence, their efforts to feign sleep to avoid speaking with him.

Lysander hesitated by the end of the bed, wondering if perhaps he should just leave it for now.

Ordinarily, he might have done just that, but he could not stop thinking about what Margaret had said concerning his daughters’ being afraid of him.

That was not the type of father he wished to be, and he needed them to know it.

“You are angry with me,” he said. It wasn’t a question. “No need to answer, for I know that you are.”

They did not respond. Through the darkness, he spied Lenora watching her older sister for guidance. That made him smile, as he loved how Lenora looked up to her.

“Which is why I wish to apologize,” he said. “For how I acted today, how I treated you. That was not…’ He sighed loudly and let his shoulders slump. “It was not fair on either of you, and I should not have become angered. I am sorry.”

The girls hesitated. No doubt they were confused, as this might have been the first time he had ever apologized to either of them.

That in itself was a problem that needed to be rectified, as Lysander was not unflappable, and more often than not, he was wont to admit that mistakes were made when it came to how he raised his daughters.

“I will apologize to Her Grace also,” he followed up.

“I know she was only trying to show the two of you a fun time. Something that I admit I don’t do nearly enough of.

” Sitting on the edge of Aurelia’s bed, he wrapped a hand around her leg and gave it a loving squeeze.

“I am sorry, girls, truly I am. And I hope that you will forgive me.”

“Of course we do, Father,” Aurelia said softly.

“Me too,” Lenora echoed.

“Ah, so both of you are awake,” he chuckled. “How suspicious.”

“And truly, we fell by accident,” Aurelia made sure to say. “It was not Mar – Her Grace’s fault,” she corrected quickly.

“I know that,” Lysander agreed. “I was just surprised, is all. Seeing the two of you come back as filthy as you were.” He laughed to show them that he was not angry.

And he smiled too, but that was genuine.

When he had seen them coming toward him, although he had been angry at how dirty they were, he had also noticed the joy on their faces.

How much fun they were having. How happy they were.

If he hadn’t been so upset, he might have stopped to understand just how important such a small thing as that was.

“So was Mar – Her Grace,” Aurelia said with a giggle. “Even more than we were.”

“You may call her Margaret,” Lysander offered by way of peace. “If she allows it.”

“She does!” Lenora cried. “She told us to call her so.”

He shook his head but continued to smile. “Why am I not surprised?”

“She is so much fun, Father,” Aurelia said. “And so kind, also.”

“And pretty,” Lenora added.

“The two of you like her very much?” he asked. Strange that when he did, a small part of him almost hoped they would say no, that for reasons he hadn’t been able to grasp, his daughters might not like Margaret as they so obviously did. Things would be so much easier if that was the case.

“So much,” Aurelia said.

“So much,” Lenora echoed.

When Lysander had first married Margaret, he had been at pains to keep his distance from her. His daughters, too, for at their age, he could not take the risk of allowing her to be near them, influencing them in ways he had assumed would only be for the worst.

Perhaps I was wrong about her. About myself. About everything.

There could be no denying that she was having a positive influence on his daughters.

When he saw them smiling and laughing earlier, Lysander was embarrassed to admit that this might have been the happiest he had seen them both in as long as he could remember.

Surely that alone was a reason to let her spend more time with them?

But what of his own relationship with the mercurial woman? That was what gave Lysander the most pause.

He was still committed to the idea of her leaving come the end of the Season.

And from the way the two bickered and argued, he doubted she would be opposed to that.

But then what of Aurelia and Lenora? How would they react when she left?

And was that yet another reason to force them to keep their distance?

Although using my daughters as an excuse also feels wrong…

Lysander could not deny that he was attracted to Margaret.

The kiss they had shared could still be felt on his lips.

And whenever he found himself speaking with her, his heart beat rose and his pulse quickened in ways that were telling.

What was more, he could sense that she felt the same, such that he even suspected she argued with him precisely to elicit this reaction.

But what did that mean? Did he want to double down and keep his distance? Did he want to try to make this marriage work? Was such a thing even possible?

“Father…” Aurelia spoke softly, almost as if she could sense the fight raging inside of him. “Margaret speaks nothing but kind words of you also.”

He frowned. “Is that so?”

“I think she likes you,” the girl giggled. “Do you like her?”

He found himself smiling at that, for the answer seemed so obvious. He could lie to himself, but he could not lie to his daughters. “I do,” he said. “Very much.”

With that, he rose from the bed, walked over, and kissed Aurelia on the forehead and then did the same to Lenora. He wished them good night and strode to the door, turning back when he reached it to watch them for a final moment.

Lysander did not know what the future might hold for him and Margaret. Or even if there was a future. But he knew that he could no longer deny his feelings and push her away, confusing the matter, while forcing her to act out in ways that he suspected she did not want to.

It was time, he decided, to be honest with her. To sit her down and tell her what he wanted. If only he knew the answer himself.

“Sleep well,” he said softly, closing the door, smiling as he did so.

He loved his daughters more than the world and would do anything for them. And if that meant not being so hard on Margaret, then so be it. She was, after all, a member of this family, even if it was short term. And it was time that he realized this and stopped fighting against her.

Having said that… he did rather enjoy their fights.

A little too much, truth be told. As he walked down the hallway, his heart racing, his mind going back to that kiss, Lysander was sure that he and she would find a reason to fight again soon.

And Lysander, typically, was already looking forward it to.