Page 12

Chapter Twelve

Snipe

Jason’s song was a real eye opener.

I felt like such a fool. It was so hard to shake the constant voice in my mind constantly telling me I was worthless and a burden. But if I dared say that aloud they’d both kick my ass.

For some odd reason, they loved my old broken ass.

“What are you thinking about so hard over there?” Jason and Sikes swapped drivers when we hit Warm Springs, Oregon. Currently Sikes was snoring from the backseat folded up like a pretzel. I envied the fact that he could fall right to sleep and in damn near any position.

“Just shit. Hoping once we’re settled in the new place my anxiety calms the fuck down.”

“Is it the uprooting that’s made you anxious or the moving in together?”

I sat there for a few minutes, contemplating his question. “My gut is telling me it’s the uprooting and my heart says once we’re in our own place I’ll be better.” Fucking heart better be right. “I’m ready for this and I love being around your family.”

“Our family,” Jason corrected me. “The twins are obsessed with their Wyatt and Mr. Sniper.”

Kids really were amazing. It fucking gutted me that abuse even happened. Said he who was…

“They’re really great. Dana…”

Jason cut me off. “Mom.”

Kinda weird to call someone Mom who was the same age as me.

“Mom looks tired. I hate that we’re leaving when we are, too, but hopefully she’ll be able to sleep more and worry less now.”

“She is but I can’t begin to tell you how excited I am that we’re able to give them a better life. Makes all the years of working multiple jobs and busting my ass to get the band signed more than worth it.”

“Does it weird you out we’re the same age as your mom?” Inquiring minds and all that.

“No. Age is just a number. What I feel for you and Sikes can’t be explained. It’s like you guys fill the void I’d fought to acknowledge for so long. We slid into place as a triad like perfectly cut puzzle pieces. Maybe I’m just weird but I fucking love what we have and what we’re working toward. You sure you’re okay with all of this?”

“It’s the only thing I’m okay with anymore. I drove Sikes nuts until we finally got with you. Now I’ve gone from antsy to, hell, I don’t even know what to call it.” It was nice to sleep last night—nightmare free. Hopefully this new dose was what my psyche required, and I wouldn’t have to go up another notch. For some I’d seen the higher dosages basically zombify them. That would be the end of life as I’d known it. “I think I just need regimen again.”

“But we’ll be back on the road in a few weeks. How is that considered regimen?”

“Think of me like a spreadsheet. Sikes puts the schedule together and I adhere to it. I need that structure in order to function. Not sure that makes any sense but structure and balance are like a security blanket to me and having him handle everything may not be fair, but it works for us. He’s the caretaker and I’m the one in dire need of being taken care of.” Jesus, saying those words aloud made me sound like a total basket case.

“No, I totally get it. For me it’s like I’ve had to take care of everyone for so long that having him come in and basically take over most of what I handled was like I could breathe again. I’m just afraid of unknowingly taking advantage of his kind heart.”

“That’s impossible,” came from the backseat as Sikes unfolded himself. “I like taking care of both of you. It’s in my nature.”

“You say that now but when you’ve got three kids to deal with and extra mouths to feed…”

Sikes cut Jason off. “I’ll love it even more. I thrive on being needed and knowing that those I love are well taken care of.” He yawned and checked his watch. “I’ll let Mickey know we’re an hour out.”

One cat nap later and Sikes was wide awake. God how I envied that man. He had demons, too, don’t get me wrong, but somehow the meds and exercises worked better for him.

“Hey,” Jason took my hand and pressed his lips to the back of it. “We love you. Don’t ever forget that.”

I was like a blushing teen. “I’ll try. I love you guys, too.” Sikes squeezed my shoulder, and Jason kept my hand in his as he drove. Protected. That was how their love made me feel. Now to get that feeling to seep deep into my soul and soothe it just as the words in Jason’s song had.

He wrote a song about me, about us. That alone was beyond amazing.

It was high time to take control of these fucking demons and prove I was worth their love to Jason and Sikes or at least, to myself. They already believed I was.

We gave our names at the guard shack and were directed back to Mickey’s house. They were in the same neighborhood as Diamond and Easton, and Joey and Stoli. Kinda cool that the Social Sinners band lived this close to each other. Bet that made it hella easier for their guards, though each couple did have their own now.

When we pulled up their driveway gate rolled open and out came Mickey, River, and Benny. Of course, Benny was bouncing around in his usual exuberant style. That was a whole lot of energy rolled into a tiny ball of mischief. But what worked for their triad was all that mattered and they were crazy in love with each other.

Just like us.

About fucking time you let that sink in, dumbass.

“Welcome guys,” Mickey bro hugged us.

“Thanks for letting us crash here. We appreciate your hospitality.” No wonder Jason was the frontman, he had a way with words and was easy on the eyes. Sikes and I mostly just grunted, though he was better with word choices than I was.

“Never a problem. We rarely have visitors so it’s nice to have company. You’ve got to be hungry. Come on inside, we’ll grill some meat then help you unload and get settled.”

“Nice. Yeah we could eat. Lead the way.” Jason and River started talking about stats which was lost on me. I was the hired muscle, nothing more. Hand-to-hand combat I excelled in, computers, not so much.

And there went another self-deprecating comment.

I wondered if I began counting how many times I put myself down if that would help deter it. Like an internal daily challenge to cut the number down. Huh, not a half bad idea.

Sikes cocked his brow. “Epiphany?”

“Something like that. I’ll tell you later.” We were a few steps behind the others, but you never knew who had super hearing like Sikes.

“Fizzbo knows we’re here. Tracker alerted him the same time I did.” Sikes held his phone up, showing me the text. “I’m thinking of asking to have trackers put on Dana’s van. I know they already put them on Jason, Marley, and Nigel’s vehicles.”

And that right there was why Sikes was our unofficial-official leader of our trio. Details I never would’ve thought of. I was more brawn than brains.

Mentally, I erased the earlier win, replaced by the current put down. So much for the mental game to build up my self-esteem.

“Jesus, how do you take both those monster cocks at once? Mad props to you.” Benny’s words stopped Jason, and we nearly ran into him.

“Excuse me? Both? Like at once?” Jason sputtered. I shook my head and wondered where Benny’s filter was.

“Oh. My. God. Yes! I love the stretch and feeling so full.” Benny shivered, obviously drawing from memory how it felt.

“Yeah, that’s not gonna happen.” Jason eyed Sikes and me. “Not in this life nor the next.”

“Benny, Jesus,” Mickey scolded though any potential punishment would be foreplay to Benny. “Filter, dude. Not everyone is a cock slut like you are.”

Okay. How much was too much to know about your temporary housemates? Personally, I was already there. Knowing they were into the whole kinky thing with Diamond and Easton was more than enough for me. To each their own and all that but the visuals I preferred to go without.

“Meat. Cow meat. Yeah, um, dinner. I think something was said about dinner?” Poor Jason had a hell of a time getting the words out. I wished I could save him, but I was just as stunned.

Benny shrugged and River covered his giggles. “Sorry, not sorry. Let me show you to your room and then give you guys the grand tour while the two grill masters get to it. I am merely here for entertainment purposes. I do not cook.”

Yes, Benny was very well taken care of by his men and not ashamed to admit it. Double dicking and all.

“That’s a great idea,” Sikes stepped in and wrapped an arm around Jason’s waist. “We could freshen up before dinner.”

“Ooohhh, freshen up. I like that. I may have to use that line myself.”

I was stunned silent. Every word to Benny was a sexual inuendo. I was afraid to ask for cereal for fear of the response I’d get. What would he find sensual about that? Please, don’t answer that.

“No like as in piss and wash our faces,” Sikes corrected, though the look on Benny’s face and the tent in his, what the hell was that he had on? Skirt? Either way, he was well past being corrected and into down to be fucked.

It’s just a few weeks, Snipe. You’ll be far too busy with band practice and house stuff.

“Whoa.” We stepped inside a room that was easily the size of our apartment and the one next door to ours.

“Bathroom is over there. The shower and tub are big enough for three. We’ve tried out every room in the house. Mmm, mmm, mmm, my men are insatiable.”

I had a feeling Benny was the insatiable one.

“Um, it’s been cleaned, right?” Jason sputtered. “Sorry, don’t mean to be rude.”

Benny giggled. “You’re funny. But yes, our housekeepers are ah-may-zing.”

Sikes headed straight for the bathroom, likely checking that very scene out. He’d waited a long time for this day.

“Snipe, Jason, can we get this in our new house?”

I rolled my eyes. We’d been over the bathroom layout with him more times than anything else.

“I like him. Are you guys by any chance into voyeurism?”

“No!” the three of us shouted as one.

“Well then,” Benny was slightly put off. “Closet is over there.” I meandered over to make sure no naked bodies would jump out at us.

“Holy shit. That’s the size of the living room in our old apartment.” Yeah, the measly boxes we brought with us would store just fine here.

“Hey, Jase, did you let Mom know we were back?” Okay, so maybe now it rolled off the tongue a bit easier but when face to face with her I’d likely revert back to Dana.

“Good call.” He slid his phone from his pocket and fired off a text. “I should probably call her soon and make sure everyone’s okay and she doesn’t need us for anything.” More like he was hoping for an excuse to get out of Benny’s line of sexual fire.

“Oh, cool. Mom started a group chat with the three of us. That will make it hella easier.” Jason typed away and my phone pinged. “Looks like we’ve been beckoned manana for food.”

It would be great to have a brain break while I play with the kids.

“Sounds great. All right, let’s get washed up and on with the tour,” Sikes announced as he reappeared. How big was that damn… Oh shit, this bathroom was huge.

“Not sure the new house has enough room for a bathroom this size.” Holy crap. This bathroom was a house in itself. That might be an overreach but dayum, this was palatial. Sikes’ naked ass would be permanently parked in that jacuzzi tub for the duration of our stay. And yes, it would easily fit four hulking men comfortably in it.

Benny waited while we washed up and I made a mental note to lock the door behind us each night. It wouldn’t surprise me to wake up and find the sneaky little sprite in bed with us. Naked as the day he was born.

We finished the tour in the basement which low and behold housed not only a home studio but their personal dungeon where Benny once again invited us to watch. Was it hot in here or was it just me? Not gonna lie and claim I’d never indulged in porn but those were nameless, faceless bodies. These three we worked with and yeah…not too comfy with that vision.

“Smells great,” Jason quickly changed the subject as we re-emerged in the kitchen. Thank fuck that tour was over. “Your home is amazing.”

“Thanks. We remodeled every inch of it after we bought it. For years we lived at River and Benny’s original house then when Social hit it we sold it and bought this one.” Mickey was so down to earth for a millionaire. “I hope Benny behaved himself during the tour?” Mickey side-eyed him but the three of us said nothing. “Yeah, I figured as much. Sorry about that. He’s a bit too passionate at times.”

Passionate, Mickey said. More like a mini horndog on a never-ending adventure to climb new trees.

That little man was far too excited for whatever punishment was coming his way.

“Food?” Jason managed to say a single word.

“Sorry, yes.” River busied himself making a salad and pulled a dish with potatoes from the oven. “Dinner is ready. Come fix your plates.”

“Jason, we’re thrilled with how Chaotic’s social media has blown up.” River took a seat beside Jason.

“Probably due to Social mentoring us. Joey and Stoli appearing when we do last-minute shows has really drawn the crowds in.”

“Dude, after dinner I’ll show you the comments. Sure, there are some fucked up ones but honestly most of the comments have to do with you and Josh and the haters have been silenced. I bet when the record drops Chaotic’s following skyrockets.”

“I’ve met up with Marley a couple of times, but that guy is hard to lock down.” Mickey shook his head. “You know who his dad is, don’t you? They live just around the corner.”

Jason’s fork dropped and hit the plate with a loud thud. “Are you fucking kidding me?”

“No. I take it you didn’t know his folks were loaded?”

“Not a fucking clue and all these years we’ve been playing with old ass shit we constantly had to fix and never once did he offer to help replace anything.” Jason sighed. “Sorry, that sounded selfish, but I put my own money into this band while working multiple jobs. I knew Marley was a player and had a tendency to get into trouble but didn’t feel that was my business. Maybe none of this was but fuck, man.”

I felt for Jason. Being in a band was being part of a team and it didn’t sound like Marley was of the same mindset.

“I don’t even want to know who his father is but at least now I know why it was so easy for him to run and get his next tattoo without worrying about saving up for it.”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to overstep and it’s none of my business. But I have tried to meet up with him.” Mickey was remorseful, that much was clear. But I knew Sikes and I were thinking the same thing—Marley was the one we’d have to keep an eye on.

By the time we finished dinner it was late, and yawns were persistent. We thanked them again then retired to the massive suite that served as our temporary home. I double and triple checked the lock on the door before we settled in for the night.