Page 12 of Her Destined Alpha (Alpha #3)

Delsanra

I wanted him to realise that his kind were monsters, that I could never accept them… I wanted him to realise that and just leave me alone. But the effect it had…

He was able to pull out of the memory before he had even seen the worst of it, and the anger that radiated from him made me stumble backwards. His eyes blazed green, and his voice was terrifying.

“Who the fuck were they?”

I didn’t know, but would he take his anger out on me if I said that? I couldn’t be so sure. Our eyes met, and his returned to their usual gorgeous grey. He walked toward me, and I stepped back.

“I… I don’t know who they were.”

I flinched when he raised his hands, only for my eyes to widen in surprise as he cupped my face.

The rough pads of his fingers felt good against my cool skin.

My heart skipped a beat when he looked down at me.

The pain and anguish that I saw in his eyes made my own sting.

I placed my hand on his chest, feeling his heart racing beneath my fingertips.

Don’t show your weakness... Why did he have this effect on me? He shook his head, unable to say anything, when he closed his eyes then removed his hands from my face and instead wrapped his arms around me.

I gasped. My hands were pressed between our chests, his strong arms around me tightly, his damp hair pressed against my cheek.

“Nothing I do will take away the hell you have been through. But I swear I will make this world a better place for you. Please, just give me a chance to prove myself.” His words were soft, thick with emotions, his scent was soothing, and his arms around me felt so…

comforting. But he was a monster just like the rest… Right?

My mind wandered to Jo. She was a young werewolf. We had kind of been there for one another in the cells. Back then, I thought that perhaps some werewolves were good, but what I went through after I woke up from the coma…

When those werewolves who had murdered Lilly and Alfred first came, they had tortured all three of us, then killed Lilly in front of Alfred. He had managed to distract them so I could run, but in the end, they had been able to capture me.

That was when it all started; the mental torture, the trauma…

They had humiliated me by stripping me bare, urinating on me, and beating me.

They would cover my face with a cloth before dousing me with water.

Their chilling laughs and disgusting comments still rang in my mind.

.. I could go on, but it only made everything come back. I was trying to stay strong… but…

The memories made tears blur my eyes. No one should have gone through that. Why did the gods hate me? I couldn’t stop the tears that streamed down my cheeks, a sob escaping my lips.

No, I couldn’t cry in front of him. He stroked the back of my hair, and our bodies moulded together as one.

He was one of them .

I tensed and pulled away suddenly.

I couldn’t accept him. Didn’t he realise that just seeing him brought back those painful memories?

“Now you know. When I see you, all I remember is them. So please just leave,” I whispered.

I knew my words would hurt him… but I had no choice. A rejection; I needed to reject him, but would he accept it? There was one way to find out. Taking a deep breath, I looked him in the eye, noticing his thick black lashes. He really was… beautiful.

I looked down, trying to clear my head.

“I, Delsanra Silver, reject you, Rayhan Rossi, as my mate.”

I felt a painful tug inside. What was that? His eyes flew open in shock as he stepped back, knocking into one of the candles on the floor as he shook his head.

“No.” It was all he said, running his fingers through his hair.

I could see the pain in his eyes. The hurt in them, why was it hurting me?

“No…” He walked to the door and, after unlocking it, left.

The door shut behind him with a snap. I closed my eyes, covering my mouth with my hands as I slid down the wall, letting the tears flow.

I was born to be alone. I would survive alone, and I would die alone. This is what I was destined for.

I wrapped my arms around my knees as I cried silently. I hated the fact that I was weak, useless, and pathetic.

Endora was dead, but she was still destroying my life. If I had my powers, I could protect myself, make everyone pay... but even in death, she had bound me. Only she had the answers to unseal me.

I looked up suddenly, my heart thudding.

I was a witch of darkness, one who could connect to the dead. I had spent time with the warden who had made me practice necromancy… Endora was dead, but I could contact her to get the answers I needed.

It was risky, but what was the worst that could happen? It could kill me, or she simply wouldn’t give me the answers I needed. The chance of her coming back was low; after all, I wasn’t strong enough to resurrect anyone in my current state.

I looked at the destroyed circle. It was time to do another spell… but before that, I needed to pack. I stood up and wiped my tears away. Locking the door, I picked up my suitcase and my clothes. Swiftly, I began folding them and putting them inside.

I was done thirty minutes later. I had all my essentials in there, my extra cash, and anything else of importance.

I looked around the mostly empty room, wishing I could have stayed for longer, but that was no longer an option.

Placing my final rent and the key in an envelope under the pillow, I picked up the backpack that I had packed, consisting of herbs, ash, crystals, and candles.

I needed to head to the graveyard; the energy there would be best for the spell. I shouldered my backpack and grabbed my suitcase, about to step out when I wondered if Rayhan was lingering around. Maybe I should go out through the bathroom window… He wouldn’t think of that.

Going to the bathroom, I looked at the tiny window. My small suitcase would only fit if the entire window was removed. I frowned in determination. Closing the toilet lid, I stood on it as I got to work.

Another twenty minutes later, I was sweating and my arms ached, but I had managed to remove the frame.

I lifted my suitcase and pushed it out of the window before climbing out myself.

I looked around before I stuck to the shadows, pulling my jacket hood up to hide my hair and hurried into the darkness.

First stop, the graveyard. Then, I would catch the train at the crack of dawn, and I’d be out of here.

I was tired of running, tired of the shackles on my powers, tired of my life being planned for me…

and above all, I couldn’t handle him. The look in his eyes, that killer smile, the way he made goosebumps rise on my skin.

I hated his kind, and that was never going to change.

It was pouring down, and I was shivering by the time I got to the graveyard.

I quickly took my candles out and the knife that I was going to use.

I got to work, whispering a spell to still the wind a little around me before I set the candles in position.

I sliced my finger deeply and began drawing the symbols in the dirt with my blood.

Once I was done, I lit the candles and took a deep breath. All I knew was what the warden had taught me when he had bought me from my father, and even then, the spells back then had gone terrifyingly wrong. Just thinking back to it made me shudder.

No time to doubt yourself, Del…

I began chanting the spell, my hands held out palms upward as I continued to chant the spell, focusing my mind on summoning Endora.

She was the only witch I knew by that name.

I knew I only had one chance at this. Whispering surrounded me, and I felt the pull from within.

I wasn’t strong enough to do the spell… Shit… Keep going, Del.

I chanted louder. A vicious wind began swirling around me, and the candles burned bright. The blood that drew the symbols on the floor glittered as it rippled. My hair defied gravity, and my eyes burned with pain and power as I fuelled everything I could into the spell.

“Well, well, well…” a whispering voice came.

Endora … I had done it. The shadows swirled within the circle I had made. As long as I maintained it, she couldn’t escape.

“Tell me how to unseal my powers!” I shouted. Blood trickled down my nose, the strong coppery taste bitter in my mouth. I knew I was using more than I had.

“And why would I do that? If you were by my side, I would have succeeded!” she spat.

“Answer me. I summoned you. You know the rule, Endora. You have to answer if summoned!” I shouted. My heart was beating scarily fast. Sure, those were the rules, but a witch as strong as Endora could defy me, and it seemed that was her plan.

“What will I get in return? Resurrect me, Delsanra, and I give you my word that you can walk free.”

Lies.

“No,” I said, holding back a scream of pain. “Answer me, Endora! I’ve summoned you!”

“Upon one condition then. Kill my sons, and I will give you the answers you seek.” Her voice held finality, and I knew she wouldn’t budge.

Was that the price for my freedom? To kill three?

“You have my word. Kill them, and you are free.”

“I…” I screamed as pain erupted within me, and I felt something wrap around me.

Her chilling laugh consumed me. With all my willpower, I scraped my foot over the edge of the circle, breaking the spell. I clutched my chest, falling forward.

Shit. I had failed…

I wouldn’t be able to live knowing I had killed for my freedom. Maybe I was better off dead. Her sons... the Lycan King... Rayhan’s father... I couldn’t do that to him.

I fell face forward on the ground, my heartbeat dimming.

Is this it? I wasn’t sure…

My eyes fluttered shut, and I thought I saw something black move towards me... but it was all fading into darkness…