Page 76 of Healing Conviction

“I came inside you without a condom, baby.”

She nodded, loving the way his soft beard brushed her forehead. “I know… it’s o-okay… I, um, like kids and all…one day, obviously. But I’m on birth control and I haven’t been with anyone in… a long time.”

His body tensed underneath her. “Matt?” He squeezed her too tightly, but she managed to shake her head before yawning.

“We only ever kissed.”

She melted on top of him, allowing herself to rest her eyes and trusting him to take her back to the tent whenever he was ready. Maybe it was because her body was completely relaxed above him that she finally realized he was tense as stone underneath her. She fell with his deflating chest as he exhaled and whispered against the top of her head.

“But you won’t even kiss me, Pix.”

Fuck.

The last thing she wanted was for him to look into that the wrong way, but she couldn’t bring herself to fight against his assumptions yet. Almost as if his body was taking the thoughts to heart, his cock slipped out from her again.

She maintained that foggy alertness while the night grew cooler around them and the fire died down. Her body shivered involuntarily and Drake wrapped them up in the blanket before carrying her back to the tent. When he finally curved around her in their sleeping bag, she’d nearly fallen asleep. He must’ve believed she had, because he softly whispered into the night.

“I need it all, Pix. Everything. Or I can’t do any of it.”

He kissed the back of her head and squeezed her closer. She hoped with everything inside her that it wouldn’t be the last time he held her like this.

CHAPTERTHIRTY

“Mom, Dad said he wasn’t hungry.” Carmen, Gail’s daughter, laid the full plate on the dining room table. “He said he didn’t want to come down to the table. So I brought his plate up for him to see if he wanted to eat in bed, but he said no to both.”

Gail finished her bite before nodding at her daughter and son. “Thank you for trying. I was hoping we could have early dinner together as a family before I have to drive to work for that late delivery, but do you two mind eating together while I join him?”

Jonas, ever the conversationalist, shrugged and took another bite of his dinner, chewing until a roll smacked him in the head.

“Hey!”

Gail hid her laugh as Carmen stuck out her tongue. Before, she would’ve reprimanded her. But after Frank’s diagnosis, her parenting style became a lot more relaxed. Patience is easier to come by if you’re grateful.

“We’ll be fine, Mom. Don’t take it too hard this time. His appetite has been wonky, but itisan early dinner for his schedule,” Carmen answered. “Just make sure he eats. He’s been down lately.”

Gail reached out and cupped her daughter’s cheek, loving how dedicated she was to her father’s health. “You’re my favorite daughter.”

Carmen and Jonas snorted with laughter, the reaction she’d been hoping for as she stood up with plates in hand. “I’ll be down when I’m finished. If you’re done before I am, do you mind clearing the table?”

Both of them nodded their agreement before she walked out of the dining room. Every stair to their bedroom made her thighs and her chest burn, a daily reminder of how many Frank had to tumble down for them to finally acknowledge that his balance was worsening again.

When she opened the door to their room, the familiar astringent smell that’d taken over the master bedroom assaulted her senses. She wouldn’t have been surprised if it’d already given the food in her hand a metallic taste.

Their dog Chewster leaped from the bed and out the door, as if they were switching shifts. She petted him as he trotted by before gazing back at her husband.

Frank sat in bed, his reading glasses on as he read his tablet. It was the nightly routine he’d kept religiously before his diagnosis, but now it was late afternoon and time was relative. She shut the door gently, but he still looked up from the screen and smiled the grin that made her fall in love with him nearly three decades ago.

“Gail, my gal, did my master plan work? You’re coming to eat with me?”

She couldn’t resist a smile as she laid their plates on the side table and brought the TV dinner table next to his side of the bed. “Oh, so you’re an evil villain now, huh?”

“The worst.” He snorted and helped her situate the bed tray over his lap before setting his meal on top. “Of course I knew that if I turned down Carmen’s dinner invitation, you’d insist it still be the two of us. And you know I’d do anything for a moment with you, darling.”

As would I.She whispered in her mind but rolled her eyes playfully at her husband.

“Still a charmer, even after all these years.”

“And all the chemo,” he joked and began to eat.