Page 52 of Haze of Obedience

She puts her arms on her knees and buries her face. "I'm fine. It'll go away soon."

"What will?"

She groans into her knees as if in pain.

I drag her onto my lap. "Tell me what's wrong."

She shakes her head.

"Right now. Tell me,” I sternly say.

She hides her face in my chest. "This is so embarrassing."

"Don't worry about that. Just tell me." I wrap my arms tighter.

"I...oh God."

I kiss her head and stroke her hair.

"I get these..." she takes a shaky breath. "I get cravings."

Cravings?

"For cocaine?"

She nods into my pecs.

My heart races faster. "How can I help you?"

"I don't know. No one has before. I just have to deal with it."

"What do you usually do when you get them?"

"What I'm doing now. Or pace the room or pit."

I make a mental note to ask her what 'the room' means later.

"Do you want to walk? I'll go with you."

"No." She clears her throat.

"Take your lozenge."

"What if it makes me feel worse?"

"Then spit it out."

"You and your spit," she mutters.

"Hey, I am a country boy," I tease.

She pulls her head back and arches her eyebrows. "Now you're going to claim that?"

"I think I might have misinterpreted things a little bit." I wince.

"Gee, you think?"

"Don't look so happy." I reach over and rotate the stick on the fire.