Page 49 of Hastings (Brothers in Arms #15)

CHAPTER 49

T hey had just left the parsonage in one of Freddy’s coaches, headed for London, when they spied him. He’d stopped his horse a way down the road and was watching them turn out of the gate.

“Stop!” Maddy yelled at the coachman. “Stop!” She turned to Stephen with a huge grin. “It’s him. It’s Hastings. He came home!”

Stephen could feel his heart pounding. Was Hastings here for good? Or was this a more formal goodbye than the one they’d exchanged in London? He held Maddy back by her arm as she tried to jump out of the coach.

“Let me out first,” he told her, amusement in his voice. “I’ll help you down.”

“Damn these blasted dresses,” she snapped. “I’d have much more freedom in breeches. Like Essie.”

“You may champion for women’s rights and freedom of dress later,” Stephen told her. “Don’t break a leg before we even get to speak to him.”

Maddy laughed and she sounded so happy that Stephen kept his worries to himself.

Stephen jumped down, and by then the footman had approached with the steps for Maddy. She came down and walked over to Stephen. He was standing there staring at Hastings, who was just sitting there in the road looking at them.

“What’s he doing?” Maddy asked. She grabbed Stephen’s hand. “Come on. He still wants us to go to him and I’m not holding on to my pride.”

No , Stephen thought. Pride was a cold companion. He let Maddy tug him forward. As soon as they started to walk toward him Hastings dismounted. He led the horse over to the side of the road and then started walking in their direction. They met in the middle of the road.

“Hastings,” Stephen said softly as they stopped, barely a foot between them.

“I’m so glad you’ve come home,” Maddy said. Stephen could feel how tense she was in the hand she had tucked into his arm.

Hastings didn’t say anything. He just reached out and enveloped both of them in a hug. The tightness in his chest relaxed and Stephen hugged him back, burying his face in Hastings’s neck, absorbing the heat and the smell of him. Stephen had one arm around Maddy, and she’d let go of his arm to hug Hastings.

“I’m sorry for being so stubborn,” Hastings said after a moment, his voice rough. “Someone told me what a fool I was being, and I finally listened. Well, a lot of somebodies told me that.”

“Sir Barnabas,” Maddy mumbled against his chest.

“Yes,” Hastings admitted. “How did you know?”

“Because he’s the only one you’d listen to,” she answered simply. “I shall annoy him by sending him a thank-you gift. Something garish that he’ll hate instantly.” Hastings laughed.

“He said you were one of the only people he’s ever met who had no fear of him,” Hastings told her. “I could tell he admired that.”

“A man with honor doesn’t frighten me,” Maddy said, pulling away and forcing Stephen back. “It’s the other kind you have to be wary of.”

Hastings still had an arm wrapped around Maddy’s waist, and he let his hand slide down Stephen’s arm so he could grasp his hand.

“Are you home to stay?” Stephen asked against his better judgement. Before they went any further, he needed to know.

“Yes. I’m home.” Hastings’s answer was simple. It required no embellishment. “Where were you going?”

“To London,” Stephen told him. “To get you.”

“We waited long enough,” Maddy declared. “I grew impatient with you. I even baked some bread to bring you as a bribe.” Hastings laughed again. He looked tired and care worn, but the laughter brightened his features.

“I grew impatient with myself,” he told them. He started walking toward the parsonage. “I had enough of my self-pity and so decided I’d better come back before the situation turned dire.”

Stephen stopped and pulled Hastings and Maddy to a stop. “You have to know we did not mean to hurt you or make plans without you. It was a spur of the moment proposal. I was afraid she was going to leave, and you were going to leave… If you’d been there, I would have proposed to you, too.”

“I know.” Hastings sighed. “My pride was hurt. And that stupid old fear of being unwanted reared its ugly head, I’m afraid. I’m not easy to love, I know that. I left before you could toss me out. At the time it seemed like the logical thing to do. As time went by, it just seemed stupid.”

“It was stupid,” Maddy told him. “If there are two people in this world who love you and understand you and want you to stay forever, it’s me and Stephen.”

“I know.” Hastings kissed her. “I also missed my old job,” he told them. “Being a government agent is hard work. I’d rather be sheriffing.”

“And there it is,” Stephen teased. “The real reason you’ve returned.”

Hastings tugged on his hand and pulled him close and leaned down and kissed him, right there in the middle of the lane. Stephen didn’t care who saw them. He reached up and held Hastings’s cheek as they kissed gently. When he pulled away the look in Hastings’s eye belied the gentle nature of the kiss.

“Maddy and I have not been with one another since you left,” he told Hastings after the kiss ended. “I’m nearly insane with pent-up desire.”

That made Hastings tip his head back and laugh heartily. “That is good to know,” he said at last. “Because I, too, have been celibate with nothing but thoughts of you two to keep me warm at night.”

“If one of you doesn’t fuck me silly before the day is through, I’m going to rethink this whole love affair,” Maddy declared. “As the creature said, ‘I have so much love to give.’ Or something similar.”

“We’re back to The Modern Prometheus ?” Hastings asked.

“I’ve read quite a few books since you left,” Maddy told him. “But I don’t know if you’d recognized a quote from one of Mrs. Radcliffe’s novels.”

“That means I wouldn’t know either way if it was right or wrong,” Hastings said. “And I’m willing to believe anything you tell me.”

“Oh, now he’s willing to believe anything I say,” Maddy said with exasperation. “Where was that trust when I first arrived?”

“I think I distrusted my feelings more than I distrusted you,” Hastings told her. “You intrigued me. I found you fascinating and infuriating and far too desirable.”

Stephen had been listening to their conversation with a delighted happiness that he could barely contain. This was it then, the beginning of the rest of his life. He would never be alone again, never long for companionship or love or belonging.

“And what did you think of me, Stephen?” Maddy asked with a smile.

“That I wanted you,” he said. “I wanted you physically, but even more than that, I wanted to love you, because you so desperately needed to be loved.”

“Did I?” she asked softly, her gaze on him so full of love it filled him with a contentment he’d never known.

“And I wanted you not just for me,” Stephen said. “I wanted you for us, for me and Hastings, because I already loved him. And I knew how much love he had inside him, how much love he wanted to give to someone. I knew he would gladly give some of that to you, Maddy.” He looked between the two of them. “You two are so alike. How could you not see that in each other? How could you not respond to that similar desire, to be loved and to love in return?”

“Yes,” Hastings said, his face expressing astonishment, as if he’d just realized something important. “That’s it. That’s what I wanted. Not just to be loved, but to have someone accept my love. I never realized that until just now, how important the second part is.”

“Darling, you are loved,” Maddy told him, putting a hand over his heart. “So much. Never doubt that. And I am quite willing to accept as much love as you’d like to give me.” The second part was said in a suggestive voice, and Stephen felt his body grow warm as arousal began to course through his veins.

“I’ll never doubt again,” Hastings told them. “Now, come on. I’ve got to get my horse, and then we are going home, and we are not leaving the bedroom for three days.”

“Only three days?” Stephen asked, amusement in his voice.

“I know you jest,” Maddy said, disappointment in her tone. “Mrs. Tulane would have an apoplexy. She’s willing to accept so much, but that might be taking it a bit far.”

“Just leave her to me,” Hastings said arrogantly.

“There are other places besides the bedroom,” Stephen suggested. “Trust me, I’ve thought about this. A lot.”

“Now, I’m intrigued,” Hastings said with a devilish grin.

“Why, you naughty parson,” Maddy said with a wink. “We can compare notes.”