Page 58 of Guided by the Stars (Creating Destiny #1)

Kai

When at the Helm

I can’t believe that piece of shit kicked me out.

Maybe I should have fought to stay, stood my ground.

The anger emanating from him was thick, pulsing through the shadows.

How could I leave her like that? But she told me she’d be fine and I just listened like the piece of shit I am. Fuck, maybe I should turn back.

My stomach knots and I halt in my tracks to lean on the wall, weighing my options.

If I go back, it’s a goddamn guarantee I’ll take a beating.

That alone would be worth it to protect her from Hades.

But I know him. He’ll take my defiance out on Adriane.

If I don’t go back, it’s possible that she’ll be fine.

Whatever he wants with her, all the options Aegaeon mentioned, none of those make sense if she’s hurt.

I just hope that’s enough and all he wants her alone for is to bond.

A shudder runs through me at the thought.

He can’t have her. Not after everything we’ve been through, everything I’ve learned about her.

I don’t know when it happened but she’s mine, and I’m not willing to give her up to anyone for any cause.

I’ll give it a bit of time before I start to worry. She’s strong. She’s put up with enough shit from Jax and I and hasn’t crumbled yet, so I need to have faith in her. She can handle him.

When I reach the door to my room, I’m reminded of Jax. I expected him to be in the hallway, waiting to escort us, but he’s nowhere to be found. My stomach drops as I enter my room and realize it’s empty.

One more fucking thing to worry about. With a sigh, I sit on my bed and rest my head in my hands, only allowing myself one minute of self-pity before I take action. In that short time though, images of Adriane caged and alone flash through my head.

My stomach tightens. This is the reason I don’t get close to people.

If I let them in, even a little, it becomes a weakness I can’t afford.

They’re a liability, something to use against me.

It’s happened before, and I swore to myself that I won’t ever put someone in that position again.

I won’t put myself through the guilt, either.

In a rush, I exit my room and head back down the hall toward the dining room. I’ll just look, make sure she’s okay. Hades doesn’t hurt Persephone, and I need to believe he wouldn’t hurt Adriane either.

I’m halfway there when Jax rounds the corner, taking long strides, his face set in a mask of worry.

“Where the hell have you been?” I roar the question, panic consuming me with the knowledge that he’s alone. He’s trying to cover his anxiety with a smile, but it falls flat.

“I had to see Kelsey. Let’s go back to your room, we need to talk. ”

He doesn’t wait for me to answer, just grabs my arm and pulls me back to my room.

As we approach the door, I pull out of his grip and continue inside.

He closes the door, locks it, and I can’t hold back any longer.

“What in the ever loving fuck was that all about? Adriane is alone with that psycho, I have to check on her. What’s going on? ”

Something must be wrong because he’s pacing and hasn’t answered my question. I don’t have time to sit here and wait for him to find words. I won’t let her leave that dinner alone, she has to know that I’ll protect her.

In a huff, I reach for the door, intending to leave, but his faint voice stops me.

“Kai…” he says, shaking his head.

He looks at me and I see something I missed earlier, fear. It’s etched across his face. I haven’t seen him look like this since Hades caught me visiting Jax when he first came here centuries ago.

He’s breathing rapidly, dragging his fingers down his face. “I heard what happened at dinner, I watched you leave. After you left…” he says, nostrils flaring as he avoids making eye contact.

“Spit it out, Jax,” I say through gritted teeth, my body frozen, unable to draw breath until he tells me what’s happening.

“Hades wanted her to bow to him. He expected her to cower without you there, but she didn’t. And you of all people know how he gets when someone doesn’t do what he wants.”

I stare in disbelief, not sure I understand what he’s saying. When I don’t follow orders I get punished, scarred. But that means… “No!” I shout to the room. “She won’t fucking survive a whipping with that chain, Jax.”

“It’s so much worse, Kai,” he chokes out. “He expected someone frail, weak minded, and we both know she’s neither of those. After she dismissed him so bluntly, he took her to Tartarus.”

His words don’t sink in at first. Tartarus is the place of punishment and torment, yes. But it’s where the worst souls go to suffer for the rest of their afterlife.

As the pieces click together in my mind, emotions build inside me and the shadows respond. For a moment I’m surrounded by nothing but darkness, the cold wisps caress my skin and bring a sliver of comfort.

The sound of coughing reaches my ears, breaking my trance.

As the shadows dissipate, I see Jax bent over, trying to breathe.

Shadows pour from his nose, his mouth, and his now-purple face slowly fades back to normal.

With my emotions spiraling out of control, the shadows took over, filling every inch of space in the room, including his airways. I just choked my best friend.

With a wave of my hand, the remaining shadows disappear and I reach out to touch him before thinking better of it. “I’m sorry, I…” I stammer, but the words halt in my throat. My power is spiralling out of control as my mind teeters on the edge of insanity. “We need to get her out of there.”

I pace, my mind conjuring up image after image. Hades used to make me sit and watch the souls being tormented. When I was older, we’d walk through and he would test me, asking why each soul deserved to be there. And if I got it wrong...well, let’s just say I learned them quickly.

I shudder and snap back to the present. “I can’t see him physically harming her, but she’s human.

Her human mind can’t handle the depravity of that place, Jax.

He’s going to break her,” I say, searching through my dresser for weapons.

I can’t let that happen, won’t let him destroy the spitfire she is and turn her into an empty shell .

Jax stands in the doorway, watching me. “Why the fuck are you just standing there? Gear up. It’ll likely be a fight, but we can’t just leave her there,” I say, but he shakes his head and continues to stand there.

His face no longer holds the emotions I saw earlier, and while I thought he was watching me, I realize he’s not.

His glassy eyes and a blank expression tell me that he’s caught in a vision.

Before long his vision clears and he nods, standing firm at the door.

“Fine, if you want to be a pussy, that’s on you,” I snarl.

“But I’m going to save my girl, so get the fuck out of my way.

” I glare at him with a look that would send a weaker god running and if he doesn’t get out of the way, I’m prepared to go through him.

“For fuck sakes Kai, get your head out of your ass and listen to me,” he says, folding his arms. “You might think you’ve hidden your feelings, but you haven’t. He knows. He knew you’d react this exact way and took precautions. You don’t stand a chance. He made sure of it.”

When I say nothing, he steps toward me and continues, “I just saw a way for us to turn this in our favor and it’ll still help Adriane, just not immediately. Will you calm down and hear me out on this?”

I sit on the edge of the bed and process what he’s said.

I know he’s right, the only chance I have to free her is if I show my power.

And if I do that, Hades will realize everything we’ve kept hidden and our efforts will be for nothing.

Plus, if Jax is right, and he knew I’d risk everything, I can’t play into his hands.

There’s no way I’ll let her witness me being punished to save her, she wouldn’t accept that and then we’d have more problems to deal with.

“Fine,” I say with a sharp nod. “I’m not agreeing to anything, but tell me this fucking plan and quickly, before I change my mind. ”

He grabs the chair from the desk in the corner and sits down.

“It’s not safe for Adriane here. Not that it was ever really safe, but I see the way you look at her and as much as you’ve fucked around with Rose, you never looked at her that way.

I like her too, she doesn’t deserve whatever shitty plan Hades has for her, so we have to get her out.

We have to hide her from him and keep her safe. ”

He’s right, I know he is, but I don’t see a way out. “We can’t send her off on her own, he’ll find her. He knows her energy signature now, it’ll be easy to track her and bring her back, just like he did with Persephone. She can’t fight him off on her own.”

He leans in close, resting his elbows on his knees. “That’s why we need to steal his helmet. As long as she wears it, no one can find her,” he says, one side of his lips turning up in a smile. “I just so happen to know where it is, which works out rather nicely since it’s our only option.”

If we do this, it means Adriane will be stuck alone with Hades.

And even though she’s strong, I’ve seen her vulnerable side through the high walls she hides behind.

She said she’d be fine, and I have to trust that she knows herself.

I need to have faith in her strength to get through this.

When she does, then at least I’ll have gotten something that will protect her.

If she can hold on to herself for just a bit longer, I’ll be able to save her. I’ll soothe her worries and replace the terrifying memories with new ones. A touch of fear is worth a lifetime of safety, isn’t it?