Page 6 of Grand Master

My actions felt excusable, I didn’t give a damn what Pops had to say about today’s suspension.

I feared how far he’d go. I reflected back to the moment in class and frowned.

One second, I was staring at my science project with pride.

I spent weeks building it with my own hands, the red paint dried perfectly along the ridges.

The wires that I strung for the chemical reaction were tucked neatly inside.

Momma assisted me, I enjoyed the quality time with her. Then the next second in class after feeling good about my project…Larson stuck his finger into it then proceeded to smear some of the damp paint. My chest lit on fire; my head started to buzz like bees swarmed around it.

I hardly remember when I decided to move.

My fist just flew; I was on top of him beating his face with my bare hands.

I felt hands grab at me; I attacked whoever off impulse.

I ignored the screams that filled the classroom, I wanted to kill Larson.

He didn’t care about the long week I had creating my volcano, the thought I put behind it.

For once, momma wasn’t worried about Pops, she helped me and enjoyed doing it.

I didn’t stop beating him until multiple hands grabbed me off of him.

They dragged me out of the room and then I saw the damage to what my fists did to Larson.

I begged momma on the way home not to call Pops. Of course, she went against what I begged for and called him on the way home with tears in her eyes. She told Pops that I could face charges as an eight-year-old minor. Larson was transported to the hospital, his parents’ planned to press charges.

It wasn’t the fight that would get my ass beat purple and blue. It was the principle to Pops of me making my momma worry. He didn’t give a damn that he stressed her by leaving her home with me for days at a time. Pops believed that nobody, not even me, momma’s son to bring his wife distress.

Momma and I waited in my room in silence.

Every couple of seconds her big sad eyes locked in with mine.

I wanted to tell her that I wasn’t upset with her, I didn’t feel like she betrayed me at all.

Before I could move my lips to utter the words, Pops walked in, the air in my room became hard to breathe in.

He rocked a sharp black suit, gold chains heavy around his neck. He smelled like cologne mixed with weed and cigarettes. Momma quickly hopped up to her feet and stood by his side. She folded her hands in front of her like she was struggling to hold herself together.

“Kenny,” he growled, as he smoothly took a step in front of momma.

“You losing your damn mind in school? Got ya momma calling me in the middle of counting money in order to feed yo nappy headed ass?”

I dropped my eyes, but my chest still heaved from the anger that simmered inside of me towards Larson.

“He ruined my fuckin’ project.” I replied lowly.

“Kenny! Tell him to stop cursing so much.” Momma frowned, stepping next to Pops.

I rolled my eyes, because Pops wouldn’t dare tell me that. He let me curse and even taught me how to cook up crack when I was seven. Pops ignored her and grilled me hard.

“Get yo ass up, you coming with me.” He stated calmly.

“Wait,” Momma’s voice cracked, it was soft but firm. She stepped in front of Pops blocking his path to me like a shield.

“He’s not just acting out, Kenny. He has a diagnosis. The doctor said impulsiveness, bipolar ? —”

“Fuck that,” Pops face twisted as the veins in his forehead pressed against his forehead.

“Ain’t shit wrong with my boy.” He laughed bitterly.

For just a second, I bit back my smile. I liked to believe nothing was wrong with me. But the strong urge to act out on all my intrusive thoughts started to falter as the days went by.

“I done told you bout trying to put soft ass labels on him. He ain’t sick, he strong. That fire in him? That’s the streets calling. You wanna drown it in pills? Boy get yo ass up and head down to the basement!” He yelled in momma’s face.

I weakly stood to my feet, my stomach twisted up. Thoughts of how far Pops would go with this ass whooping had me frozen in place.

“He’s just a child, Kenny. He needs more understanding; more love from the both of us. Not punishment.” Momma tried to reason with him.

“What he need is to learn discipline. Learn the code of power. School can’t teach him that, but I will. From now on, you ain’t wasting time in no fuckin’ classrooms. You gone learn how to make muthafucka’s bow. Show them that the board of power is in your hands!” He spat out bitterly.

“Josephine, I done told you about getting in the way of how I raise my boy. Take yo prissy ass down to the kitchen and start dinner.” He demanded.

“Don’t hurt my baby, Kendrick.” Momma stood her ground then turned to look at me with reassuring eyes.

I wanted to feel the security in her stare but already knew it was pointless. She quietly walked out, closed the door behind her and Pops talked lowly. It was the same calm measured tone that I saw him take with men on the streets before he killed them.

“One day, you’ll find only one woman that’s meant for you. You’ll go through plenty of hoes, but it’ll only be one that make your heart beat differently.” He pulled a blunt from behind his ear.

He lit it, seconds later he coughed violently.

My brows bunched together when I smelled the faint smell of weed laced with crack.

Pops hid nothing from me or momma. He didn’t believe in walking on eggshells in a home that he provided for his family.

Pops was unapologetically him; he didn’t explain or give any excuses to who he was.

“A man without a woman is half a fuckin’ man.

You can’t even spell woman without man being the last letters in the word.

Wherever there’s a king, a queen is close by reigning supreme over his heart but never his mind.

Josephine is the only woman that I will ever bend my will for to a certain extent.

That extent stops at you.” He smiled sinisterly.

“You came from me, my ball sack. She just carried you. Josephine belongs to me, just like you do. You will do what the fuck I say, whenever I say it.” He blew smoke out in my direction.

“So, when I told you to go down to the basement, you should have moved right away.” He pointed the laced blunt my way.

“I’m sorry, Pops.” I uttered lowly.

“Nah you ain’t. You meant it. No son of mines is weak nor sorry. So, remember, never apologize for some shit you meant. Save that shit for your soul mate.” He smirked with the blunt tucked between his dark purple lips.

With his hands behind his back, he eyed my desk with a look that made me want to go into protective mode.

“Josephine ever tell you she got her bachelor’s degree in chemistry.

She even got her doctoral degree. Her pretty ass took courses in various branches of chemistry like organic, inorganic, analytical, physical, and biochemistry.

She even gained laboratory experience through internships; research was always crucial to her.

That was her first love, until I dominated and pushed that shit to second place.

While you at school wasting time, she’s in her books still.

She has a strong love for it, so I don’t deny her of it.

Besides, I’m busy in the streets all the time.

As long as she knows when the king comes home, all the extra bullshit has to stop.

” He snapped his fingers causing me to jump.

I wanted to tell him that I knew it all.

Momma showed me her books, made me study them all.

It’s one of the reasons why I was falling in love with chemistry, learning the science of it all thrilled me.

Even when Pops taught me how to cook up crack, I made it into a scientific lesson.

Because of momma, I was smart and advanced in my studies.

“That’s her lane.” He took a long pull from his blunt. His eyes were bloodshot red.

“Not yours!” His voice elevated.

His free fist swept across my lab desk in a blur.

Glass tubes shattered on the ground. All my notes and books that I had been studying crumpled to the ground.

I eyed the red liquid that bled into the carpet.

My already ruined volcano was now far from repairable.

Angered stiffened me, why would he ruin my lab desk.

It took me a month to create those red potions that soaked into the carpet now, with momma.

“No son of mine gonna be held up in this room acting like a fucking scientist. That’s some bitch shit; it’s reserved for your momma!” He barked out.

“You want to beat up on kids that can’t fight? Have your momma worried, calling me when I’m knee deep in counting my mu’fuckin’ moneys!” He snarled with rage burning in his dark eyes.

He stomped over to my bookcase that was packed with books that I studied and loved more than life. Raising his foot, he kicked it in. I watched the wood crack; my books collapsed down to the floor in disarray.

“This weak ass shit ain’t gone save you, Kenric! It’s not gone help you protect the board that I plan on giving you when I’m no longer here. When I die, you continue what the fuck I worked hard for!” His boots stomped on the books; he twisted his foot causing pages to rip from them.

Something inside of me snapped. The buzzing in my head roared louder than ever. My body moved on its own like it did when Larson ruined my volcano. I animalistically launched for him. My fists pounded against his chest as I screamed my hate for him through a sore throat.

“It’s mine! Momma gave it all to me! You can’t ruin my shit!” I cried hitting, kicking, and clawing at him.

I wanted to make him feel how I felt on the inside. I just didn’t understand what was so bad about me beating a boy ass at school. Pops taught me to protect myself always and demand respect from people first.

Pops didn’t bulge; he stood tall letting me wail on him. His jaw was set tight; his eyes blazed with twisted pride.

“You got fight in you,” he said through clenched teeth.

“Very good Kenric, but you ain’t gone waste your strength in power in no fuckin’ lab. You gone use that shit to make mu’fucka’s respect you.” He continued.

Tears blurred my vision. My fists hurt, but I kept swinging; kept screaming until momma burst through the door. Her scream ripped through me…

“Stop! Please, Kenny, and Kenric!” She pleaded.

Her perfume cut through the sour stench of rage in the air. She grabbed me, her arms wrapped around my small waist. She pulled me to her with all the strength inside of her. The slick smile plastered on pop’s face made me thrash and buck against her.

“You hurt my woman doing all of that, and I’ll break something on you, fasho.” He gritted out.

“Baby, stop, please,” Momma’s voice cracked in my ear.

“Respect your dad, and me. Calm yourself down. You’re in control always baby.”

I eyed all the damage as my chest heaved up and down. It was too late for respect right now. I was already gone. My chest heaved, my vision tunneled, it felt like my heart had split in half.

Fuck him! A voice roared loudly in my head. I was consumed with hate; it ate away at my young soul. My hands trembled as I looked at my pops.

“Let him go. He a man now. Let this lil idiot get down where he mad at.” He chuckled dryly.

“My word is law. School is a thing of the past. I’m his teacher, now. All of this bullshit that you pumping into my boy stops today!” He spat out bitterly.

Momma snapped her head toward him with tears welled in her eyes.

“He’s eight years old, Kenny! He’s not your solider out on the streets, he’s your son!” She cried, a low sob left her mouth.

Realization hit me hard, my age…It didn’t feel like I was eight years old at all.

I carried the burdens and fears of a grown man.

Momma’s words made the air vibrate, and for the first time, I saw Pops pause.

Just a small flicker, in seconds his lips curled into a snarl, his voice thundered so loud, I felt them in my chest.

“Yes, he’s my son, Josephine. Mine. I own Kenric.” He clicked his teeth.

“You think the streets give a fuck how old he is? You think they gon’ spare him cause he’s just a boy?” He stepped closer, pointing at me accusingly.

“The fire that you see in him ain’t no sickness!

It’s what’s gon’ keep him alive! Not no school, not no damn teachers, not those stupid ass doctors that you constantly take him to.

You believe all that bullshit about disorders, when MY SON DON’T NEED NO DIAGNOSIS!

HE NEEDS TO BE READY!” His voice boomed loudly.

I shook in momma’s arms, not sure if I was shaking from rage or fear now…maybe it was both.

“Ready for what?” She sobbed; her arms clutched me tighter in her hold.

“Ready to lose himself like you? Ready to bury his dreams in the dirt? He’s not you, and he doesn’t have to be.” She spat out harshly, like she was disgusted.

That made his eyes go dark; darker than I’d ever seen. He took a step, his voice lowered into something colder, and distant from the emotions he showed a couple of seconds ago.

“You going against me, Josephine? You letting your emotions dictate how I raise my boy?” He asked coldly, giving her an icy look.

“Kendrick, no. I’m not, I love him just as much as I do you.” She confessed sighing roughly.

“Seems like your loyalty is faltering. Like you’re forgetting who the fuck I am to you and him.” He dropped his eyes down to me.

“I don’t love shit unless I own it. I own the both of you, and you both will do what the fuck I say.” He licked his dry lips then looked back up at my mom.

“He is me. He got my blood, my fire. You can’t fight it or change that fact. One day, he will thank me for making him into a real king player, instead of some weak man hiding behind experiments.”