Page 68 of Goldilocks
“And earlier, when I turned away the siren and showed you favour, I acted in a manner that would please any mate of my kind. It is unfair of you to reject me so harshly. I have only been among your people for a short time, not nearly long enough to learn all your values. But I have made many efforts to do so, and I have adjusted as I have learned. I ask that you be considerate of all of that, as I have been for you when you have acted in ways that would angermeif you were of the same kind.” Goldilocks finished his speech with a harsh breath.
Sam swallowed hard. His thoughts seemed to move along like sludge, preoccupied with unravelling every declaration and accusation just issued. “I never meant to insult you,” Sam said, addressing the easiest part.
“I know.”
When was the last timeSamhad been accused of being the thoughtless one? Never. Sam wasn’t the thoughtless one. He was the one who gave too many chances. The bleeding heart. The one who empathised when he shouldn’t and got trod on over and over, until he finally learned to stop opening himself to other people.
But despite all that, Goldilocks was right.
“I’ve been thinking about our differences. It didn’t occur to me that you were also doing the same…Or that you were so thoughtful.”
Sam realised now that he’d naturally assumed he was the only one putting any thought into things. He was the only one actually considering their differences. He was like a beaten dog, primed to assume he was the one who cared. And, like always, he was the one who was going to get hurt.
Goldilocks eased onto his side next to Sam, smoothly turning from tail to legs so none of Sam got crushed. He rested his head on the same pillow as Sam, and his body relaxed, moulding protectively around Sam. Sam tried not to blush when he felt the prod at his hip.
He shuffled a little closer to Goldilocks. “I’m sorry for snapping at you in the pub earlier. You weren’t kind, but I didn’t handle it well either.”
“I will not be unkind to the siren in the future,” Goldilocks promised.
Sam paused. “I mean, don’t go flirting with him or anything, alright?” He felt a tad guilty for saying it. Austin seemed like he could use someone, maybe a lot of someones, being nice to him.
Goldilocks hummed and buried his face into Sam’s neck.
“Since you’re doing that for me, conforming to my values, shall I do something for you too? Make this a better nest?” Sam could take a hint or two about his terrible, terrible nest.
“Yes.”
Sam bit his cheek, trying not to smile at the absurdity of hisnestbeing criticised. “I thought you liked the painted hull.”
Goldilocks stilled. “The hull is for me?”
Sam considered saying yes to please Goldilocks, but he stopped himself to think things through. “Vi’s nest was that entire building, right? Wouldn’t that mean mine is the entire boat?”
“If you intend it to be,” Goldilocks said carefully. He was speaking into the tendons of Sam’s neck, his warm breaths exhaling against the hollow of his throat. It tickled, but it didn’t feel unsafe for Goldilocks to be the one touching the vulnerable spot.
“I do,” Sam decided.
Goldilocks shivered. He chuffed, the sound the same as the ones he produced when in his other form and unable to speak words. “That pleases me,” he said warmly. “You are a sweet mate. Very gentle.” He kissed Sam’s neck. “Does your hand ache greatly? I can bring you to Vi’s nest after I have warmed you. She has many numbing agents.”
“No, it’s okay,” Sam said. “It’s not sore. And I have to go check on my dad first thing tomorrow anyway.”
There was a pause. Then, “You are lying.”
Sam sighed. Okay. Yeah. His handached. He’d taken the painkillers he had onboard for his headaches and was doing his best not to move it at all, but random shooting pains stung the cuts, regardless. Grabbing Goldilocks to kiss him hadn’t helped matters either. He was going to have to get it checked out by a doctor. “It’s not that bad,” Sam said. The bleeding stopped, so he was sure he didn’t need stitches, but cuts on the palm were a huge pain to heal. He’d have to be extra careful not to use the hand, or he’d be reopening the wounds every five minutes. At least it was his non-dominant hand.
Goldilocks’s silence was charged with displeasure. The feeling was similar to the one he’d gotten when he’d told Goldilocks he wasn’t sticking around at Vi’s nest last time. “Sam.” Goldilocks spoke his name in a measured tone. “Ghouls are dangerous. Vi has studied them for many years, and she is the only person in the world I would trust to tend your wounds. If you do not have ghouls here, then your healers will not know what dangers to look for in the injury.” His hand slid down Sam’s side beneath the blankets until his hand was against the wrist of Sam’s injured hand. “It is important to me that she tends this injury.”
Sam could always go to the doctor after Vi. And the seriousness in Goldilocks’s voice told him this was something that mattered to him. “Alright,” Sam said. “But only after I sort out my dad in the morning. No towing the boat away when I fall asleep.”
Goldilocks grunted. He buried his face in the crook of Sam’s neck. “Very well. It is nice of me to compromise,” he added, voice sly.
Sam choked on a laugh. “Oh, come on.”
Between the blankets and Goldilocks’s body heat, the chill in the night air was banished from the cabin, and the pain in Sam’s hand eased away, pushed back either by the painkillers or by the warmth. Sam relaxed into Goldilocks’s arms, amazed at how he could go from being so furiously angry with the merman to curled up in his arms and totally at ease in the space of only a few hours. It was hard to be angry when he saved Sam from a vicious wormandsaved Fionn’s life in the space of a few minutes. And brought Sam blankets and told him that his nest was terrible.
Sam bit the inside of his cheek, fighting a broad smile with everything he had.
“You are happy,” Goldilocks said softly, breaking the silence. His hand flattened on Sam’s stomach, moving as Sam huffed in amusement. “That pleases me,” he said.