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22

Lennon

“ G ood luck!” I tell the anxious student bouncing on her toes in front of me as I slide her coffee across the counter. She accepts it with a weak smile and dashes off. The caffeine probably isn’t going to do her exam anxiety any favors, but who am I to judge?

Krista leans one hip against the register with a heavy sigh. Our afternoon rush has finally died down to a slow trickle, and we’re closing early today since it’s the last day before winter break.

“I need sunshine on an unhealthy, desperate level,” she groans.

“Just a few more days and you’ll be stretched out on a pool chair, drink in hand, thoughts of this café and school all melting away,” I tease and wipe down the counter.

“Ugh, I cannot freaking wait. Are you going anywhere for the holidays?”

I shake my head. “Just back to my parents for a few days over Christmas, but otherwise no.” We never travelled much, outside of hockey tournaments, and after my dad had his car accident, it became even less of a priority.

“Well at least you don’t have to work. I’m ready to shut this place down for a bit.”

“Seriously,” I say, although I sort of wish they left the café open over winter break. It wouldn’t make sense to pay to staff it when barely anyone is on campus, but both this and tutoring are on hiatus for the next month, and I know it’s going to be tight making my paychecks stretch.

Krista glances around the near-empty café and setting sun. “Why don’t you go ahead and head out? I’ll punch out for you in a little bit, but no use for both of us just sitting here for the last hour?”

“Are you sure?”

She brushes me off. “Yeah. You’ve helped my ass out more times than I could count over this semester. Go on home and enjoy an early start to your break.”

I hesitate, not wanting to leave her high and dry, but she’s right. We’re not going to get many more students in the last hour we’re open, and the idea of getting home at a decent time for once is appealing enough to have me shucking off my apron and tossing it in the laundry bin. “Thanks, girl. Have a great vacation. Enjoy some of that Florida sun for me, alright?”

She hugs me before giving me a gentle nudge toward the door. “You know I will. I’ll send you pics.”

“You better.”

I grab my bag and coat before I’m out the door and trekking back home. A light dusting of snow coats the ground, but it’s been fairly mild so far this winter. But I know better than to speak that out loud, because the moment I would, we’d get a dumping.

The apartment smells amazing when I step inside and find Grace in the kitchen making stir fry veggies and chicken.

“Got enough for me?” I ask, and she jumps, clutching her chest as she turns around.

“Oh my god, you scared me!” She grabs her phone to turn down the music on her speaker. “What are you doing home early?”

“Krista let me go.” I close my eyes and take a deep inhale. “That smells so good, I’m starving.”

Grace grabs a second plate out of the cupboard, her red hair swishing behind her. “I guess I can split it with you.”

“How gracious,” I mock and slide onto one of our barstools. Our apartment is small, but we’ve maximized the most of the space by using part of the island for a bar rather than cramming in a dining table in the living room. “How’d your last final go?”

“Psh, easy peasy,” Grace says. “College is a lot more fun when you get all the Gen Eds out of the way.”

I laugh and retrieve my water bottle from my backpack. “Seriously. I knew you’d do better this year.” Grace struggled academically through her first two years, almost getting benched last season, but she just needed to be in classes that she enjoys.

“No more tutoring from you required.” She winks at me and plates up the food before taking a seat across from me.

We both dig in and eat in silence for a few minutes before she asks, “How was watching film with Coach Holloway? He sing your praises the entire time? First shoutout of the season, girl!”

I smile gratefully at her enthusiasm, but it’s slightly forced at the mention of him . “The day that he sings anyone’s praises is the day hell freezes over.”

Grace chuckles. “I don’t know, he’s definitely warmed up. Especially with you. He actually seems like he gives a shit now.”

“Or maybe Coach Maver told him to shape up or ship out.”

She points her fork at me. “True.”

I don’t actually think Coach Maver has ever given him some sort of talking to, but the less Grace or anyone else for that matter thinks that his warming up has anything to do with me, the better.

“Now, to something more important and because I feel like we’re never even home at the same time so I haven’t gotten the chance to ask you,” she says, “what happened with Mason? That seemed sudden.”

I frown. “Did it? I’ve barely seen him the past few months.”

Grace shrugs. “Bryant said he didn’t see it coming.”

“Probably because he’s never thinking much farther than what’s currently in front of his face at the moment.”

She takes a bite, chewing slowly. “Is there someone else?”

I push my food around the plate, avoiding her gaze. “No.”

“Are you sure about that?”

“When would I have had time to meet anyone else?”

She pauses. “Fair point.” I breathe a sigh of relief. “I never thought you guys were long term anyways.”

“We weren’t.” I snort. “It was just an easy fix with him.”

“And you don’t need that anymore?” She eyes me curiously.

I play it cool. “There will be plenty of time for that. But right now, I have enough on my plate. I’m good. Now, how’s Bryant? Are you bringing him home for Christmas?”

Her entire face changes, brightening just at the mention of his name. “Yes.” She smiles nervously. “We’re each doing Christmas Day with our own families, but he’s coming to mine the day after, and I’m going to his on Christmas Eve.”

I can’t help but think about what Luke would look like sitting around the dining room table with my parents. Talking hockey with my dad, looking over the intense Christmas village that spans the entire length of our living room and having my mom explain each building.

The moment the images appear I immediately scold myself because what the actual hell kind of delusion is that? Purely wishful, stupid thinking.

“I’m so happy for you.” I squeeze Grace’s hand. “That’s a huge step.”

She exhales. “I know, but it feels right. Does that sound crazy?”

Oh, if only she knew what kind of shit was circling in my own head right now.

“It absolutely does not sound crazy. You guys were friends for a while first, and whatever timeline works for you guys is what matters.”

“I love you,” she says. “I know we spend a ton of time together at practice and games, but I still feel like we never get any quality time together anymore.”

“Me too,” I sigh. “I keep thinking about what it’s going to be like to actually have free time once I graduate, but that’s all an illusion because then there will be grown-up jobs and responsibilities, and then I’ll probably miss this time in my life instead.”

“Grass is always greener,” she muses.

I grab my water bottle and raise it toward her. “Let’s make a pact now that when you get back from winter break that we’re going to make the most of our final semester together.” Grace still has one more year left, but come May, I’ll be out of here. “We’re going to win a fucking championship, and we’re going to actually make time for ourselves and to enjoy it. Deal?”

Grace clinks her cup against mine. “I’ll cheers to that!”

Our laughter mixes together, blending into the music. I clean up the dishes since she did the cooking, and Grace heads into her room to finish getting the last of her things packed. She’s driving home tonight, while I’m not getting picked up until tomorrow.

After I shower and finish my own packing, I flop onto my bed and pull out my phone.

Me: What time are you planning to come pick me up tomorrow? I’ll be ready whenever

Mom: We can come first thing. Then we could have breakfast?

Me: Depends on what you’re making

Dad: Whatever you’d like. French toast?

Me: Ugh yes please! Text me when you guys are leaving

Mom: Will do. Can’t wait to see you. Love you.

Dad: Excited to have you home

Me: Love you both

I’ve always loved Christmas, but I’m more excited to go home for a few days. It’ll be good to get away from campus and hockey for a little bit. Time to get some perspective and focus back that I’ve lost over the last few months. Luke makes it hard to think straight, and I’ve gone from always feeling like the rational, practical friend, to the one who is constantly thinking about a man who I for one, can’t have, and two, doesn’t even want me.