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Too late, I tell myself, as a cold shadow crosses my spirit.

After ending the call with Maddy, I ring Mom. It’s good to catch up, but I don’t really tell her anything. Telling her I almost died won’t be helpful. Telling her I’ve fallen for a real man who does wicked things to me, would also worry her.

We talk about life, and it’s good to catch up. Mom’s a great person, and we’re kind of like old friends. But old friends who don’t discuss love, and well, lust.

As we end the call, I pace alone in the penthouse, and I look across NYC. I’m excited, but I’m scared. I know I am living on a knife edge, but I feel alive.

Likenever before.

37

LORENZO

I have never lived with a woman, and it’s new to me. I have only ever relied on myself. Many adopted kid’s end up the same way, from what I know. Being given away as a child, really messes with your head. It’s hard to feel good enough, when as a kid you are discarded.

I’m extremely independent, and for lack of a better word, broken. I have to make sure I don’t hurt or damage Storm.

I must also appear, totally cool, and calm with us living together. But I don’t have a problem with that, at all, which is weird.

Until I met Storm, and fell, if that’s what it is, I was convinced I’d never find the one. That I would never live with a woman, in a real, and healthy relationship.

I still need alone time, and I disguise that with workouts in the gym, long swims, and contemplating business on the roof.

I don’t want to change anything, but I do not want her to know.

To know I’m slowly getting used to this, and trying to adapt fast,

I am taking it easy on Storm as we have sex, fuck, and make love. Somehow, she seems to keep taking everything I give her.

She is extremely accommodating, and knowing she has only slept with one guy, turns me on.

I enjoy taking, licking, tasting, savoring, and devouring her, and doing it more than any other time in my life.

I have started to command her, on when, and where to not wear panties.

She likes that, and it’s important to me. I enjoy telling her when she can come for me. A little messed up, but hot.

After not really dating for a year, and having very little sex, it’s likely healthy for me to be with Storm.

I just have to ensure, I do not retreat into my old ways, and get too demanding, or play mind games.

The old me was a deviant, a fiend. Storm deserves more and I need to set limits.

It is good I keep my more wild kinks in check, for at least now.

If I want this to work, I have to start acting like I’m in a team. I want to make this,uswork.

No! I have to makeuswork.

I am expectedto attend a gala this coming Friday, but I do not want to go. I am donating to various causes, it is something I’ve done for a while.

I have been donating several million a year to a fund. And that fund, disperses money to global orphanages, and adoption agencies.

After convincing the equally reclusive Storm to join me, we dress, and we talk.

I adjust my tux jacket and bow tie, as Storm turns in the stunning black Gucci dress we selected this afternoon.

She felt too shy to wear it, but I told her if she does not want to dress up, I will have to attend the ball, alone. Once dressed, I knew she would love it, and it will help her confidence.