Page 66 of Flameborne: Chosen (Emberquell Academy #1)

~ brEN ~

Saul had landed in the launch hollow first, so when Donavyn called his name first, I almost cried.

I’d never been so happy for someone else and so upset with myself at the same time.

My head spun, replaying every second of the Banner Seize, desperately trying to figure out what I could have done differently so that I could stand on this stage with pride.

The four banners clutched in my hands burned my palms with sheer humiliation.

Eight of us, and I was the only one who failed.

Even Lorr and Faren who’d been punished for interfering with me, would trial again and pass. They’d both passed this time. It was only a delay for them.

But for me, this was the end.

When Donavyn stood at my toes, it would be to declare that I was unfit, and wouldn’t progress. Those eyes, those hazel windows that brightened and shadowed on my behalf would shutter closed. Because I’d finally failed.

I wanted to weep, and cry, and hide my face. But I couldn’t. I couldn’t let Akhane down that way. I couldn’t embarrass my squad like that.

Oh God. My squad.

I would have to face them after this. Listen to them reassure me.

My stomach twisted into knots as Saul was announced to the crowd as Flameborne: First Rank, and Donavyn moved to the next man.

With each person he announced, I shrank deeper in on myself. I had only moments until I had stand under his penetrating gaze and admit my failure publicly. Watch the disappointment cloud his eyes. Watch him step away, hear that deep, warm voice turn cold and instruct me to leave .

I wouldn’t be a Furyknight. That meant Donavyn wouldn’t be my Commander anymore. No more training. No more gifts. No nothing. He wouldn’t be anything but a man who’d once tried to help me and I’d let him down.

Akhane tried to talk to me through the link, but I couldn’t listen to her kind words knowing that we’d be relegated to messengers, and it would be my fault and…

Oh shit.

If we were relegated to messengers I’d be working with Faren and Lorr.

Except in three months I’d have to watch them leave the messenger ranks and return to the Dragon Keep and take their second chance.

Meanwhile, I’d stay there, wasting a battle dragon for the rest of my days and listening to others whisper about the first woman who could have become a Furyknight except she fell at the first fucking hurdle.

I blinked and frowned at the stage.

Those two fuckers tripped me up. They worked against me together and fucked up everything. Whether they stole my banners or not, they were still half the reason my Furyknight career ended here.

And they would get another chance.

It was so unfair. So fucking unfair!

I grimaced, swallowing back tears of rage and frustration as the crowd applauded again, then a shadow fell over me.

Donavyn.

“Stand to attention, Flameborne. You made it. Stand with pride,” he murmured under the level of the applause that was dying down after the Flameborne next to me received his pin.

I looked right up at him, pleading with my eyes that he’d just let me leave and not make me—

“Flameborne Bren, you flew with great courage and skill today. Your formations were solid, your solo flights and tasks completed quickly and efficiently. And you faced challenges in the Banner Seize that were unique.”

Why was he looking at me with a smile? Why did he—

“Do you have any special reports to make?” he intoned with a glance at the audience. “Anything to report?”

What was he trying to do? Get me hated by every Flameborne and Furyknight ever to wear leathers? I couldn’t report anything they’d done—especially after he’d already disciplined them!

“No, Sir,” I said as strongly as I could.

Donavyn frowned. But a moment later it softened to a smile. “Your honor is great, Bren. You’ll be welcome at our table. Now, please, for the witnesses, please show me your banners!”

He presented me with this statement like it was a gift. As if I’d be pleased.

Shamed and close to tears again, I lifted my hands and opened my palms, practically shoving the banners at him .

It wasn’t until he’d counted out the third that his expression clouded, and when he reached the fourth and there were none left…

“Bren,” he said quietly. “I need all five. I have to count them in front of everyone.”

I shook my head. “I only got four. When I got to the last rope, there wasn’t a banner there. It must have been knocked off or taken by accident,” I murmured, my vision blurring with tears of frustration and shame.

Donavyn went still, and the audience was quiet. I could feel the eyes of my brothers on me, their shock and disappointment.

I wanted the floor to open under my feet and swallow me up. I wanted Akhane to rush the stage and steal me away.

I wanted to never have seen a Furyknight in my life because everything they touched went wrong. Like me.

“Bren…” Donavyn breathed, then a fierce V pressed into his brows. “Flameborne Kearney, you say your banner was missing from the final rope?”

I nodded miserably.

He looked over his shoulder at the other Flameborne, then his brows shot up. He pulled fistfuls of banners out of his pockets and rifled through them. I had one, seconds-long burst of hope that he’d find it among Lorr and Faren’s spoils, but of course not.

When he’d dropped all the banners and they fluttered to the stage at his feet he looked at me, and I saw his eyes change when he realized I’d failed. And it fucking killed me.

It was worse than having to face Ronen or Gil. I wanted to weep. I wanted to grab his shirt and plead with him to find a way, not to stop believing in me, to—

“Flameborne Kearney,” he said darkly, slowly. “Tell me, did you misplace a banner, or was it torn from your grasp? You completed the task, correct?”

“No, Sir,” I breathed.

Donavyn blinked. “What was that?”

I cleared my throat and made myself meet his eyes, still pleading with him for mercy. “I said, no Sir. I wasn’t able to locate the final banner. I didn’t complete the assignment. I… I failed Sir.”

He took a deep breath and his face lightened. For a moment I was confused, then offended when he smiled.

“Well done, Bren,” he murmured before turning to the stunned crowd. I frowned at him, but his back was now to me as he addressed the King and Queen and the watching crowd.

“Today has been a test for us all. I have long held that of the skills of a Furyknight, strength of character is the most critical. Skills and duties can be learned. But character cannot. Either an adult holds themselves to a level of honor that will be an asset to our legions, or they do not. And today Flameborne Kearney has proven herself one of us.”

I blinked, but he went on .

“I had the displeasure of disciplining two of our Flameborne just minutes ago for their attempts to interfere with Kearney’s progress, and their sabotage of her goal.

I wasn’t aware that they’d succeeded in their goal.

However, I knew they’d placed Kearney in very real danger—danger that ended in the unintentional wounding of her dragon.

Despite the injustices against her, she did not raise her voice in complaint.

And when asked whether she’d met the task, she didn’t cite the actions of others as her reason for failure.

Instead, she carried the responsibility on her own shoulders.

“This is the integrity of a Furyknight. These are the points of character which we applaud and seek to deepen in every Flameborne and Furyknight in our ranks. However, Kearney has not navigated the final hurdle. She has only collected four of the five banners of her squad.” He let those words hang in the air and my cheeks went up in flames as every set of eyes in the crowd and on the stage looked on me with thoughts of my failure echoing over their head.

Then, to my horror, Donavyn turned to the King and Queen and addressed them directly, drawing their attention to me.

“Your Majesties, you attended the evaluation with me. You watched the events. As the Commander of the Furyknights, I contend that while Flameborne Kearney missed one final task—likely through no fault of her own—she has demonstrated far more critical aspects of the Furyknight artillery—true character. It is not for me to lift a man—or woman—above their station. But I cannot in good conscience ignore the circumstances. I humbly request your wise and benevolent counsel. Should Flameborne Kearney be failed, or raised to First Rank?”

Gasps and a murmur of shock rippled through the gathered audience. My jaw dropped. I gaped at Donavyn, but he stood there, calmly, calling on the King and Queen to make an assessment of my performance? Why? To what—

The King and Queen tipped their heads together in a brief conversation. Then the Queen nodded once before her husband rose to his feet and raised one hand, palm forward, to the people.

“The Queen and I are in agreement. It is the courage of heart, the honor, and character of a Furyknight that we desire over any other skill or talent. For her responsibility and honor, we commend Flameborne Kearney and determine that she should be raised.”

He stood for a moment, expectant, staring at the crowd, but it wasn’t until Donavyn clapped his hands and my squad suddenly leaped up from their seats, whooping and cheering, that the crowd broke into enthusiastic—if somewhat confused—applause.

While they all clapped and the King and Queen nodded smugly at the crowd, Donavyn turned to face me again. He didn’t wait for the crowd to calm down, just smiled and reached out to grab the lapel of my flying leathers and press a small, bronze dragon wing pin through the leather.

“Congratulations, Bren,” he said quietly, his eyes twinkling. “I knew you could do it. ”

“But, I didn’t!” I said, but then I looked down where he was straightening my lapel, and I couldn’t take my eyes off that pin.

“Yes, you did, Bren, I promise. I’ll explain later. I promise that as well.”

Then he turned back to the crowd to give a speech about the honor of Furyknights, how these First Rank Flameborne would be welcomed as fledging knights, and urged everyone to pray for our safety and growth, with the hand of God upon us.

And when he announced the close of the Trial and read our names, and everyone cheered, I just stared dumbly. Numbly.

It wasn’t until everyone moved, and Saul rushed up to lift me off my feet and turn me in a circle that I smiled.

It happened. Not the way it should have, but it happened.

I passed the first Trial.

I was Flameborne: First Rank.

And I still had a chance to become a Furyknight!

‘Well done, Little Flame, I knew you could do it!’

‘Akhane, I’m so sorry, I thought—’

‘I know what you thought, Bren. And I vow, I’ll teach you to trust one day.’

‘I do trust you, Akhane!’

‘Not me, silly. I’ll teach you to trust the Creator’s plan—and yourself. One of these days you will see yourself as God sees you. And then we will be complete.’