Page 11 of Finding Forgiveness

“I never wanted to hurt you, I hope you know that. Neither of us did. We both felt bad that all this was happening behind your back. We’d talked about telling you.”

“Then why didn’t you?”

“Things ended between us before we got the chance.”

“You moved on to the next one? The story of your life.”

“No … no I didn’t. She wasn’t just a quick lay for me, Jaz, she was the first and only girl I ever loved.”

“Then why did you stop seeing her?”

“It wasn’t my doing,” I admit.

“Cassie ended things?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know. I told her I loved her … she said she loved me back, then she ghosted me.”

“Something must’ve happened for her to do that.”

“I’ve racked my brain, trust me. To this day I still don’t know what I did or didn’t do … I meant it when I told her I loved her.”Fuck.I scrub my hand over my face. “It crushed me, Jaz.”

“None of it makes sense … well maybe the part of you hating her for all these years does.”

“I don’t hate her. I’ve tried to, but for some reason, I can’t. I’ll admit I’ve struggled having her around considering everything that happened between us. It’s the reason I took the job in Sydney.”

“You said it was all that was available.”

“I lied.”

“I wish you would’ve talked to me.”

“It just seemed pointless after the fact.”

“Aww, Con. It would’ve been hard for you to see her with other guys then?”

“You think? That first fucker she started seeing after she dumped me, earned himself a black eye.”

“Connor!”

“I know, I know. But at the time I was messed up … I couldn’t see straight.”

I glance up when the doors to the ward open and my eyes take in the middle-aged female that enters. She’s dressed in dark blue scrubs, and I’m not sure if she’s a doctor or a nurse, but the hard lines I see on her face as she storms past me, tell me someone is about to feel her wrath.

“I probably should get back to Cass,” I say, focusing back on my call.

“Please keep me updated.”

“I will, Jaz, and again I’m sorry for everything that happened.”

“I’m still hurt that you guys kept it from me, but I’ll get over it. It’s the least of our worries right now.”

“Love you, little sis.”

“I love you too, Con.”