Page 29 of Finding Embers and Stars (Twin Flames Duet #1)

Chapter twenty-nine

E very so often, my demonic side opens its mouth and inserts a whole ass shoe store. Usually over something stupid and unimportant. Never in my life have my words caused as much pain as I did to Sage and Piper tonight.

Sitting here listening to my mates relive the absolute hell they grew up in guts me. Knowing my words had Sage considering leaving us all behind, even Piper, fills me with shame.

Just because I have a hair trigger when it comes to cheating does not give me the right to jump to the conclusions I did. Piper was right to punch me. Even if they did have past lovers, it’s their right. Goddess knows I’ve had my share.

Sage clears her throat once Piper’s finished. It’s obvious that telling us their story took a lot out of both of them mentally.

Milo squeezes Sage, pressing a kiss to her temple. “Why don’t we take a break? Get up and move around a bit, then come back for our stories.”

Piper and Sage walk out of the room hand in hand and the rest of us split off to use the bathroom or grab refills. As much as I want a stiff drink, I force myself to stick with water. Getting drunk may make my story easier to tell, but it won’t earn me any points with my mates.

Too soon, we’re back in the living room. Everyone returning to the same seats as before. I hate that I’m across the room from my mates, but I know I haven't earned the right to be closer to them. I have a long way to go before I can touch Sage again.

Sage’s eyes meet mine and I feel a jolt straight down to my soul. She and Piper are my future. I just hope they will give me a chance to make up for my mistakes.

She yanks her gaze away from mine, focusing on the floor. “I think it’s time for us to hear your stories now. Why don’t we let Wyatt have some time to collect his thoughts, so his mouth doesn’t run away with his common sense again.”

Even though I don’t blame her, I can’t help but flinch from the heavy sarcasm lacing her words. Earning her trust again will be an uphill battle every step of the way, but I’ve never been one to take the easy road.

I look at Milo, silently begging him to start. While none of our stories are easy, his is less gruesome than the rest of ours.

Milo nods at me. He and I have always been close. Sometimes it feels like we don’t even need words to communicate. When he punched me outside, it really hit home how out of line I was. Milo isn’t normally one to get physical without a damn good reason.

He turns his focus to Piper and Sage. “I know nothing about my past. I was found on the beach a few hours south of here when I was three years old. There was a note pinned to my shirt with my name and birthday. Until we met you, I didn’t even know what type of supernatural I was.”

I fight an irrational surge of jealousy when Sage reaches for his hand, linking his fingers with hers. I squash the thought and focus on his words, keeping my own eyes on the floor.

“The orphanage I ended up in was one of the biggest in the state. It had over three hundred kids in residence. They celebrated birthdays in large groups each month. We met at one of those parties because we share a birthday.”

I can’t help but smile as I think back on that day. We were so young and when we walked into that room, we just knew we needed to stick together.

Milo keeps going, unaware of my trip down memory lane. “The five of us became inseparable on that first day. Somehow, we knew that we needed to stay together, and we pitched a fit until we got shuffled around to stay in the same wing of the orphanage.

“All my life, people have either hated me on sight or are drawn to me in a creepy, stalker-like way. The only people that haven’t reacted to such extremes are my brothers and now the two of you. I was bullied when I was younger. Before I hit my growth spurt at seventeen, I was the runt of the litter. The guys did what they could, but there was always someone that wanted to fuck with me.

“You both said that since you met, you’ve shared everything. Well, it’s the same for us. I believe that the seven of us are destined to be together.”

Piper rubs his arm soothingly and Sage leans back against his chest. Fuck, they look good together.

Liam shifts Piper sideways in his lap so he can see both her and Sage. “Like wolves, horses live in family groups, forming herds that stay together. Both for community and safety. Horse shifters aren’t all that common, especially draft horses. By the time I came along, my parents had been kicked out of their herd.

“They were junkies and only concerned about their next fix. I’m not even sure why they had me, it was clear they didn’t want me around and that they considered me an inconvenience. They constantly left me alone in whatever shitty apartment they were staying in until they had to leave to dodge the rent. One day, they never came back. It was seven days before the landlord found me.”

Piper’s startled gasp makes my heart clench. That she’s so affected by our history shouldn’t shock me, but everything about our mates seems to be what I least expect from them. She presses her face into his neck, squeezing him tight until he starts speaking again.

“The landlord called the cops, and I eventually landed in the orphanage. I haven’t seen my parents since they disappeared. I have no idea if they’re dead or alive. Honestly, I don’t really care. Everyone I consider family is in this room.”

Liam clears his throat, trying to ignore the way his voice catches. He hates talking about his parents, not that any of us don’t feel the same.

“To me, the orphanage was like a vacation. I had three hot meals a day and a warm place to sleep. Once I met the guys, it was even better. The one thing my parents taught me was how not to treat those I care about. I swear I will spend the rest of our lives showing you both how much I cherish you.”

Walker looks over at Sage. “Will you sit with me, my mate? I may need to borrow your strength to get through this.”

Sage looks shocked by his admission but quickly slides from Milo’s lap into his. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she lays her head on his shoulder and lets out a contented sigh.

Walker’s voice is faint, barely a whisper. “Like you, embers, I was born in Alaska. My parents were amazing. They were fated mates and even as a toddler I could feel the love they had for each other and for me. Bears can shift as early as three years old. Most shifters besides the wolves encourage the shift as early as possible so you can grow up building a bond with your animal. It makes it easier to communicate with them and control your shifts.”

“How is that possible? We are told that the ceremony can only be performed at eighteen.” Piper looks so confused. My poor mate, there is so much you don’t know.

Maverick reaches for Piper’s hand, squeezing her fingers. “Everything changed when your father became the Alpha Supreme. The ceremony can be performed at any age, on any full moon. He changed it to maintain more control over the wolves. The more time you have to bond with your animal, the stronger you are.”

Piper looks absolutely devastated. She lifts her hand to cover her mouth as tears roll down her cheeks. When she looks over at Sage, it’s just in time to see her jump up from Walker’s lap and start pacing around the room.

“Why am I not fucking surprised that the Alpha Dick would pull such a douchey move? Had he allowed us to shift younger, I could have fought off the three stooges or at least been able to fly away from them!”

Her hands are fisted in her long black and purple hair, the loose strands swirling around her as she paces. I can’t help but think she looks magnificent.

“He always knew that Piper was stronger. That’s why he beat her down every day. He couldn’t break her spirit, so he tried to break her body. I swear to the baby unicorn Jesus that when I get my hands on that narcissistic fuck, he’s going to wish I cursed his dick off years ago.”

With a scream of rage, she flings her arm out, clearing the table of drinks and food. She stands there staring at the mess on the floor, tears pouring down her cheeks. How must it feel to know that your Alpha, the leader that is supposed to protect and support you, deliberately sabotaged you?

Walker stands and pulls her into his arms, holding her close for a moment before guiding her back to the couch. Once they sit down, Piper leans over to whisper to her, rubbing her shoulder soothingly. I always thought I shared a close bond with my brothers, but the way Piper and Sage are in tune with each other makes our bond look weak.

Milo looks around at the mess, wrinkling his nose at the spilled soda that’s soaking into the carpet. “Maybe we should take a break for a moment. We can get this cleaned up while Sage rests for a minute.”

Sage sits up in Walker’s lap looking around the room sheepishly. When her eyes lock with mine, I read the challenge in them. “I vote that Wyatt cleans up while Walker finishes his story.”

Without hesitation, I jump up and start gathering the trash. There are many things I may argue about with my mates and brothers, but right now I will do whatever Sage asks of me. I will pray to the Goddess that someday she will give me another chance.

Walker clears his throat and as I walk behind the couch to get rid of the trash, I squeeze his shoulder. I know this won’t be an easy story for him to share.

“I was three when I started shifting. I loved it. The freedom and the power in my bear form is something I can’t really describe. I always wanted to practice, and I would beg my parents relentlessly until they would take me out to play in the snow. That day Dad gave in first, he hollered at Mom that we were going out fishing for dinner. She decided to come with us and the three of us shifted and went down to the lake. In Alaska, only indigenous Alaskans are allowed to hunt Polar Bears, and it was well past the season, so my parents didn’t give shifting a second thought.”

Walker’s voice quavers and Sage immediately wraps her arms around his neck, holding him close. “Pops and I were in the water, and he was teaching me how to stalk fish. Mom was watching us from shore. When I looked over at her, I was so confused to see her fur turn red. The color was so bright against her fur and the snow. I didn’t understand what I was seeing until I heard the report of the rifle.”

Coming back from the kitchen, I see the tears rolling down Walker’s face, but I will never think less of my brothers for letting the depth of their pain show. Tears don’t make someone weak, not caring does. Which is why it kills me that I let my mouth run away with my brain tonight and caused my mates so much pain.

“Dad pushed me towards shore, but another shot rang out and he collapsed on top of me, half in the water right beside my mom. It felt like I was trapped there underneath him for years. Really, it was only a few hours but all I could see was the side of my mom’s head, the blood running down her fur, staining the snow. Dad was so heavy, I couldn’t get out from underneath him for hours. Once I did get free, I didn’t want to leave them, and I didn’t know where to go. The next morning, a neighbor found me. He was a grizzly shifter, too old to take care of a three-year-old, so I was sent to an orphanage in Anchorage. Several years later, I was moved to Florida. I was the last one to join our merry band of misfits. I arrived two days before the joint birthday party.”

As Walker’s voice trails off, I return to my seat across the room from my mates. I hate being this far from them, but I know I need to distance myself in preparation for ripping the band-aids off my scars.

Watching Sage and Piper kiss and cuddle my brother to offer him comfort makes me happy. As strange as it sounds, there is no jealousy between us. We’ve known for years that we would share a mate and now that we’ve found not one, but two amazing women, things seem even better than we anticipated.

Walker clears his throat. No doubt preparing to finish his story and share the most heartbreaking piece of his history. “When we aged out of the system, Liam helped me track down the details of the case. His hacking skills come in quite handy sometimes. I always wondered why no one ever came to harvest the bodies. The teeth and fur of a polar bear are quite rare and worth money to shady dealers. Turns out that the shots were heard by Fish and Game, and they caught the poachers and arrested them.”

Walker’s voice hardens, “Since my parents were shifted, Fish and Game didn’t even know a murder had been committed. The men got six months in jail and a fine for what they did.”

When Piper looks over at Liam, there is a level of rage in her eyes that surprises me. “I need names and addresses. I will end them.”

Nodding in agreement, Sage grins savagely. “Those assholes are getting added to my dick vanishing list. Given how many guys are getting added to it, I've decided to change the name to my cock-a-poof list.” The room is dead silent for a solid minute before we all break out in laughter, even Walker. The way Sage delivered her promise with a straight face was just what we needed to know how much she cares and to break the mounting tension in the room.

As a group, we all turn to Maverick to tell his story. He stands up to pace, restless energy rolling off him as he runs his fingers through his hair. “We all know my story telling skills are lacking, so bear with me. My mom and two sisters were killed in a house fire. I was with my father outside at the time. Like Walker, my shift was unlocked early. As the Alpha of our Dire wolf pack, my father didn’t feel that he had to follow the Supreme Alpha’s rules about waiting until eighteen.”

He finally stops pacing to look at our mates. The defiant way he stares at them is almost like he’s daring them to judge him. “My father is a complete piece of shit. I was the youngest and the coveted son that my father had been waiting for. We were outside practicing my shifts when the fire started. I ran towards the house. I could already hear my sisters screaming…”

Maverick’s voice trails off and I can tell he’s fighting tears, but he’s such a stubborn ass he will never let them fall. “He held me back and said that everything was happening as it should be. He was relieved to be rid of his defective wife and worthless daughters. I was just about to turn five and he held me down in the snow and forced me to watch the fire and listen until their screams stopped. It’s one of the reasons I became a firefighter.”

Piper reaches out slowly to take his hand. Offering what small comfort she can while he continues to pace in front of the couch. Only this time he only takes two steps before turning back so he doesn’t have to let go of her fingers.

“The next morning, I heard him on the phone to his best friend, Richard. I didn’t realize until later that Uncle Richard was the same man as the Alpha Supreme. He was laughing and joking, telling Richard how well his plan had worked and how he was going to look for a better wife. After testing out all the options, of course.”

I see the way Sage pales at that phrase and Walker squeezes her gently, soothing her with whispered words and soft touches. What I wouldn’t give to be the one holding her right now.

Piper squeezes Maverick’s hand. “Finish it.”

He sighs. “I didn’t wait around. Hell, I didn’t even pack anything. Mom had volunteered at a shelter for supernatural kids, and she took me with her sometimes even though it pissed my father off. I walked out of the house while he was still on the phone with Richard and turned myself in under a new name. Luckily no one recognized me. Maybe the Goddess was looking out for me that day.”

Piper scrubs both hands over her face. “The fucking hits just keep coming, don’t they? Your dad is Spencer Knight, isn’t he?”

Mav’s eyes widen in shock as he nods at her.

“And you’re Spencer Jr.?”

He gives another nod, a look of confusion on his face. How does our mate know of him?

“A few years after you went missing, I heard my dad screaming on the phone to someone. He was saying that a deal had been made and if you weren’t there to mate me on my eighteenth birthday, then the deal was off. I was five at the time. Mom had snuck me out of the house to get away from his bad temper. I went down to play by the river, and I found Sage and her family having a picnic.”

The room is so quiet you can hear a pin drop and one by one, my mates and brothers turn their gaze to me. Now that they have bared their scars, it’s time for me to try and explain my actions. Though I’m demon enough to admit that no amount of trauma excuses the way I treated Sage. I’m honestly happy that Piper broke my nose. I’m happy to know that if I do go off the deep end that they always have each other.

“My parents died in a murder suicide.” I let that bomb settle before I dive into the next one. “My dad was an alcoholic. He didn’t enjoy drinking, but he used it to numb the pain of watching my mother sleep with every dick she stumbled across.”

I can’t make myself look at Sage or Piper. Keeping my eyes firmly glued to the floor, I try to explain how I was raised. “My father was one of the Generals of Hell. He was a big supporter of Lilith and Lucifer, but once Leviathan made his move, there wasn’t anything the Generals could do to stop him.”

“My father’s best friend was like an uncle to me. He was always there for the family and helped my father pick up the pieces every time my mother got caught having another affair. Dad couldn’t handle being alone, so he refused to leave her and turned a blind eye to her hookups. At least he tried. Every time she came home smelling of a different demon, it tore him apart.”

“I think they would have gone on like that forever, always unhappy with each other. Except one day dad came home and caught her with his best friend. He walked in the door to find his best friend railing his wife in the kitchen of his own house.”

Milo comes over to sit beside me, pressing his shoulder into mine. His support gives me the strength to finish.

“Mom always sent me to my room when she had dates. I heard the yelling and came running downstairs just in time to see Dad grab a butcher knife and kill his best friend and then mom. He was standing over them, my mother’s blood dripping off the blade of the knife.”

“He looked right at me and said, ‘I’m sorry, my son. Sorry I’m not strong enough to stay and take care of you. When you find love, hold on to it and never let anyone touch what’s yours.’”

The room is quiet, no one wanting to interrupt my story until I’ve purged all the poison. “Hearing how intertwined our stories are, all I can think is that the Moon Goddess has a plan for us. It feels like we’ve all been steered to this exact point and time. The man that found me was Lucifer’s brother Silas. He’s the one that brought me to the Florida orphanage and made sure my family money was set aside for when I came of age. Not that there was much of an inheritance since dad drank most of it away.”

I take a shuddering breath

“I know it’s not an excuse, and it doesn’t make up for what I said, but what happened with my parents is why I reacted the way I did. Sage, you didn’t deserve what I said, and I will spend the rest of my life begging for your forgiveness.”

Sage walks over, kneeling between my feet. “Thank you for sharing with us, Wyatt. I can understand your reaction, but it’s going to take some time for me to move past the hurt. Your words hit too hard and too deep for me to move past them quickly.” She braces her hands on my knees, pushing herself to her feet. She brushes a kiss across my cheek and steps back to face the room.

It feels like I had a single moment to bask in the warmth of the sun and now I’ve been left in the cold.

Piper stands up to hug Sage and they have another of their silent conversations. I’m not sure how they can say so much with just a look, but it’s clear that they are operating on a whole other wavelength than the rest of us.

Holding her hand out to Walker, Sage tries to smile, though I can tell it’s forced. “Will you stay with me tonight? I’m not up for a cuddle pile.”

They walk upstairs together, and I know I’m watching half of my heart walk away from me. The other half takes my hand, tugging me to my feet. “Come on boys, today has been way too long. I’m ready for bed.” I follow Piper out of the room with my brothers and I know there isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for these two women.