Page 57 of Every Broken Piece

Chapter fifty-three

Tess

I was ready way before six because I didn’t know what I’d packed that I could wear to dinner with Gabe.

He said casual so I settled for my favorite pair of jeans and a pink and white checked flannel over a white t-shirt.

I hope this isn’t too casual but without knowing where we’re going, I have no idea.

I’m nervous. I’ve slept beside him the last two nights, yet I don’t know how to act on a date. Is this a date? He didn’t specifically say.

After our midnight snack the other night, we returned to bed.

He wrapped me in his arms, and we fell asleep.

The next night he didn’t even question when I followed him into his room.

He’s never pushed for sex, although I know it’s not because he doesn’t want to.

I’ve woken up pressed against him two mornings in a row.

I can feel his desire for me. I’m thankful that he seems content to wait because I’m not there yet.

I’m just now getting used to the casual kisses as he walks by, the slide of his hand on my shoulder, or his palm pressed against the small of my back.

He seems to know that I need to go slow, and he appears to be fine with that.

Yesterday after he left for work, I searched for jobs.

I also half-heartedly looked at apartments.

Staying in Denver isn’t even a question anymore.

Even thought my mind tells me to get my own place, put some distance between us to see if what I’m feeling for him is the real deal, my heart yearns to stay here.

I check my phone and see that I have fifteen minutes before Gabe gets home, so I call Amelia. We’ve texted off and on, but I haven’t heard her voice since I left Cincinnati.

“Girl, I was just thinking about you,” Amelia says by way of answering.

“Yeah? What were you thinking?”

“How much I miss you, but also how happy I am that you’re with your hunky man.”

“He’s not my man.”

But he is , my mind whispers.

She laughs. “Stop. You know he is.”

My feelings are so convoluted and barely make sense to me. I don’t know how I’d explain them to Amelia.

“How’s Denver?” she asks.

“Beautiful. Cold. We went hiking the other day. I didn’t know there were such beautiful places like this.”

“I saw the pictures you sent me. They’re gorgeous.”

“Maybe you can visit sometime.” Amelia is the only friend I’ve ever had who’s stuck with me. She’s my first best friend and I’m pretty sure Gabe wouldn’t care if she came for a visit.

“So does that mean you’re staying?”

I wander to the huge windows and stare at the mountain peak in the distance, imagining myself living here. Making this my permanent home. Not a place to land until I’m forced to move on. Not temporary.

My forever home.

“Amelia,” I whisper. “I think I’m falling in love with him.”

Amelia squeals. “I’ve been waiting for this. Oh, Tess. I’m so happy for you. You deserve this happiness. Have you told him?”

“No.” Will there ever be a day that fear doesn’t hold me back?

“Has he told you how he feels?”

“Yes.” In so many ways other than words. Bubble gum toothpaste. Blankets. Sunsets and long walks. Just bringing me here alone tells me how he feels.

“Then what are you waiting for? Don’t leave the poor guy hanging.”

I shrug even though she can’t see it. “I want to be sure.”

“I can understand that but how will you be sure if you don’t give it a shot?”

“That’s the problem. I want to be sure before I give it a shot. Yet I can’t be sure until I give it a shot.”

“You’ll know when the time is right.”

“I suppose. Oh, hey. Gabe told me that the detective found out the name of my attacker and that he’s in Chicago. I guess he’s given up on me.”

Amelia knows about Sandra and why I was attacked.

I didn’t feel right not telling her in case Sandra discovers our friendship and tries to approach Amelia.

But since Gabe told me what Hardwick told him, I feel much better about the whole thing.

Like maybe this is finally over. Gabe had been right about telling the police everything.

Having them in my corner is an unexpected relief.

“That’s so good to hear, Tess. Maybe that’s your sign to start taking chances and to finally live the life you want.”

“I’ve been looking for jobs too. I have an interview on Monday as a receptionist for a real estate agency.” What I really want is my old job back, but that’s not going to happen. I need to move on and maybe this is what moving on looks like.

“Whoever hires you will be lucky.”

“You have to say that because you’re my friend. Speaking of which, can I use you as a reference?”

“Of course. I’ll talk you up so good they won’t have a choice but to hire you.”

I step away from the window and roam the perimeter of the living room, stopping at the fireplace as Amelia updates me on our friend group and what everyone is up to. I “uh-huh” in all the right places as my eye catches on a framed picture I hadn’t noticed before.

It’s of Gabe when he was younger, holding baby Pax. But it’s the woman pressed against Gabe’s side that I’m drawn to. Cara.

I step closer, Amelia’s voice a comforting buzz in my ear as I study Gabe’s wife.

She’s beautiful in a natural, almost ethereal way in a long, flowing skirt with a peasant blouse.

Her hair is a tangle of curls that fall to her elbows.

Long, silver earrings reach her shoulders.

She’s smiling, her head tipping toward Gabe as she looks up at him.

They make a stunning couple. An adorable little family.

By my guesstimation of how old Pax is in the picture, this was probably taken a year before she died.

Gabe looks the same, a little younger, less smile lines beside his eyes, no gray in his hair. Happy. He looks so happy.

“So anyway, Conor was pissed that you disappeared without saying goodbye. I really think he had something for you.”

I’m drawn back into the conversation as I take a step away from the picture. My heart aches for the three in the photo, for the trauma that they had no idea was barreling toward them. For a mother who never got to see her son grow up to be a wonderful human being.

I turn my back to the fireplace. “There was nothing between me and Conor.”

“He hoped for more, but he’ll be fine. It’s you I’m so excited about. It’s like you’re standing on the edge of the rest of your life.”

Standing on the edge of the rest of my life. I like the sound of that because it’s exactly how I feel. Scared to take the leap. Excited at what’s ahead of me. Relieved that the past is finished. Eager to move forward.

“I have to go,” I say. “Gabe’ll be here soon and we’re going out to dinner.”

“You go, girl. Have fun. Tell me all about it later. I’ll talk to you soon.”

We hang up just as the electronic door lock beeps and the door opens. However, it’s not Gabe who walks in, but Pax. I haven’t seen Pax since the night we got drunk and I’m a little unsure how this is going to go.

He smiles when he sees me. “Hey, Tess.” And he walks straight toward me, folding me in the biggest bear hug.

I pat his back awkwardly before he pulls away, his expression now serious. “Hey, listen. I’m really sorry about getting you drunk the other night.”

“Why are you apologizing? I’m the one who drank.”

His grin is all boyish Gabe. “Who knew Go Fish could be so fun. I hope you weren’t too hungover.”

“Your dad made me go hiking with a hangover.”

“Oh, man. That’s some extreme punishment.”

I wave my hand in the air. “It was fun, and no harm done. I hope you didn’t get in too much trouble.”

He shrugs. “I got a long lecture. He said I needed to be careful with you because you’re special.”

I blink. “He said that?”

“Yeah. It was weird. But anyway, I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay and I had fun. I’ve never done that before.”

“Get drunk?” He looks surprised.

“Get drunk. Played a drinking game.”

“Seriously? You need to get out more.”

I laugh. “I’m beginning to see that.”

He looks around. “Where’s Dad?”

“He should be home any minute.” Home. I try not to put too much faith in that word but it’s becoming more and more difficult.

“You coming with us?”

“Yes, she’s coming with us.” Gabe walks in and I can’t help my smile or the way my heart flips seeing him. His expression softens as he walks straight to me, kissing me gently on the lips.

I pull back, glancing at Pax but he’s smiling so I guess me with his father is okay with him. I’ll have to remember to ask Gabe what the protocol is when Pax is home.

“Where’re we going?” I ask. I’d thought the dinner date was just Gabe and me but apparently, it’s Pax too. I don’t mind in the least.

“It’s Thursday night,” Pax says as if that explains everything.

I must look confused because Pax says, “Dad and Jack and I meet for dinner every Thursday night. We’ve been doing it since I was little.” He turns to Gabe who’s pulling his tie off. “How long have we been doing this?”

Gabe tosses his tie on the back of the couch and shrugs out of his suitcoat. “I don’t know. Fifteen years now?”

“Oh.” I take a step back, my heart sinking as I suddenly feel like the proverbial third wheel.

Gabe’s head shoots up and he pins me with a concerned look. “You’re coming, right?”

“I don’t think... I don’t want to intrude on a family tradition. I’ll stay here and make a turkey sandwich.”

Gabe tosses his coat on top of his tie and stalks toward me.

“But you have to come,” Pax says. “You’re part of the family now.”

Startled, I jerk my gaze to him. “I’m not, Pax. This is something you and your dad and uncle do.”

“And now you,” Gabe says as he stops in front of me, studying me, trying to read my mind.

“You three go do your thing. I’ll be fine.” I try to sound airy and unconcerned. Instead, it comes out strangled.

“Tess.” Gabe takes both my hands. “We want you there. All of us. Jack asked if you were coming.”

“Yeah,” Pax says. “We want you to come.”

I look from Gabe, to Pax, and back to Gabe, unsure.

“We’d really like you to come have pizza with us. But if it’s something you’re not comfortable with and you really don’t want to go, we understand,” Gabe says.

“Are you sure?” Memories of being the foster kid that always tagged along bombard me.

“I’ve never been more sure of anything,” he says softly. “But I’ll respect whatever decision you make.”