Page 88 of Eternal

“Exactly.”

“Wait.” Teal spins until she’s straddling me, and I grip her thighs, loving that she’s feeling comfortable enough to initiate affection for once. “What are you saying? You weren’t a virgin when we had sex.”

“No.” I laugh, and she glares in response. “I wasn’t a virgin.”

“But you haven’t had sex with anyone…” Her eyebrows pinch. “In years?”

I shake my head.

“Why?”

“It stopped feeling right.” I reach up, brushing my thumb over her cheek. “My tastes aren’t exactly conventional, Teal. I’m better at inflicting pain than pleasure.”

“But with me—”

“You’re the exception.” I drag my hand into her colorful strands, pulling them back.

She grabs my wrist, stopping me. “You’re actually serious?”

“Mm-hmm. I’d rather piss you off than lie to you.”

Her mouth falls open like she’s about to argue, but she claps it shut because she knows that’s the truth.

“You mean that?” she asks, her eyebrows pinching.

“You have enough holes in your life.” I brush my fingers over her temple, tapping twice. “You want an answer from me? I’ll tell you the truth, whether you like it or not. So keep that in mind.”

She holds my hand to the side of her face. “Thank you for that, Declan.”

A small smile cracks in the corner of her mouth, and I can’t help leaning forward to kiss her. Her lips part for my tongue, and her chest sinks against me.

Her forehead presses to mine as she breaks the kiss. “I feel like I don’t even know who I am half the time.”

“You’ll figure it out.”

“Maybe.” She sighs. “You know that painting you have hanging above your bed? It’s a dream I keep having. Or maybe I should call it a nightmare. I think it’s from that night I ended up at Montgomery.”

“Do you remember anything at all from that night?”

“Headlights.” She presses her lips together, and her eyebrows pinch as she thinks. “Sunflowers. Stars. None of it makes sense. I don’t even know what made me stand in the middle of the road. I just wanted it to be over.Whatever it was, it must have been bad because even my mind doesn’t want me to have to remember it.”

“Do you want to remember?”

Her green eyes stare into mine. “When I’m ready, maybe.”

25

The River

Teal

Mila pulls the carinto an empty space at the end of the Sigma House roundabout. Cars spill out from the driveway in all directions. Sigma House is on the outskirts of town, but it feels like the center of it when Sigma Sin hosts a party.

She cuts the engine, and I climb out, fixing my skirt.

I never wear skirts, but Mila talked me into it tonight. She’s made it her mission to make me over, and I’m regretting that she convinced me this was a good idea the second the crisp night air breezes over my legs.

Goosebumps flurry across my skin as I shiver.