Page 33 of Emerald Moon (Pitch Mountain Pack #2)

”I’m ready to have a relationship. With you, just to be super clear. My world is better since getting to know you, too.”

Cass’ smile grew.

”Wait, you’ve liked me since you first met me?” Jo asked.

”Does that freak you out?”

”No, honestly it doesn’t. I just can’t believe it. Why me?”

”Why not you? You’re the best, too.”

Jo wanted to deflect, but they let the words settle in their heart until their smile stretched so far their cheeks hurt. “Can I kiss you again?”

”You better.”

Jo laughed and Cass did, too. They kept bursting into giggles as they leaned in closer together. Jo’s eyes fluttered shut and they felt Cass’ breath on their skin right before they felt Dolly’s tail brush across their lips. Their eyes flew open.

”Dolly! We’re having a moment here!”

Cass pressed a kiss to the white cat’s head and grinned. “She didn’t want to miss out.”

Jo scooped up Dolly and placed her on the other side of the bed. They turned back to Cass. “Where were we?”

”Right about here.” Cass bent down, placing a hand at the nape of Jo’s neck and bringing their lips together. Jo gasped before easing into it, their eyes closing and lips parting. Cass was gentle but intentional in the way she moved, like everything about Jo was worth learning and remembering.

Even with flowers next to their bed and the memory of Cass’ lips pressed against their own still fresh, Jo wasn’t magically fixed by the power of love.

Brains weren’t like that. But Jo tried to search for truth, like Wil had said.

They tried to see how the flowers were evidence that Cass cared, that the empty iced coffee cups were evidence that Krista and Wil cared and not just a bunch of mess.

Their brain tried to tell them that Jo was tricking everyone into liking them, but it was easier to ignore while they picked themselves back up and got ready to be a person again.

As the afternoon sun poured in through the curtains, Jo took care of Dolly’s needs first, got rid of the empty coffee cups, picked out clothes that made them happy, and took a shower.

The shower after the worst of a depressive episode felt the best, like Jo could imagine those terrible thoughts washing down the drain.

Wil was in the room when they got out of the bathroom getting dressed and ready for something. Jo flopped down on the edge of their bed, grinning. “I’ve got news.”

”Is it about Cass?”

”Yes.”

”Is it what I think it is?”

“Probably.”

Wil grabbed a cardigan from her closet, slung it over her arm, then turned around. ”I bet some congratulations are in order.”

”Thank you! Yes. It happened. We said nice words at each other’s faces and then we tried to kiss, and Dolly ruined it, but then we kissed for real and no one got confused or had hurt feelings afterwards. It was just nice.”

”I’m happy for you, truly. You deserve good things in your life.”

”I know, I know. And it’s going to likely take me decades to learn that lesson, but I’m trying.

It’s not always going to be easy with the way my brain is, but who knows?

Maybe I’m just on the wrong meds and something better is out there for me that I need to talk to my doctor about.

And maybe having Cass around will make it easier not to listen to those nasty things my brain says.

And maybe I’ll just keep growing and getting better and I won’t have such an awful opinion of myself. ”

”It’s wonderful to grow, but you know — somewhere in there you know — you’re already the best version of yourself.”

”Thanks, Wil. I mean it.”

”Of course.” Wil grabbed art supplies off her desk and carefully slid them into a canvas tote bag from their local bookstore.

“And I’ll keep growing and changing right there along with you, being the best versions of ourselves in the present and not some distant future.

We can be our best selves over and over again.

It’s not some competition you win or lose.

There’s enough love in the universe to love and celebrate yourself. ”

Jo sat with Wil’s words washing over them. They gave them time to sink in, but the walls they’d built to defend themselves, the same ones that kept them from growing, made it impossible for them to stick. “That is harder to listen to and accept than you might think.”

Wil took a step forward, stopping in front of Jo.

”No, I know, because I had a point where I didn’t want to hear any of that either — didn’t want to believe any of it, but things got so much better when I tried.

” Wil sat down on the floor, cross-legged and looking up at Jo.

“I just got so tired of not liking myself. The world wants you to not love yourself. Sometimes the most rebellious thing you can do is know that you’re worthy of love and good things. ”

“I’ll do my best.”

”Because you already are. And now you have Cass to remind you, too.”

“I do,” Jo agreed, feeling something sad yet sweet in their chest. “I’m glad I let myself admit I wanted that.”

“That you deserved that.”

“That, too.”

“Can’t say it out loud?” Wil teased.

“Not yet! It’s too hard to say I deserve things! I’ll get there. Give me a few decades.”

”Heavens, I hope you don’t take that long.”

“Why? We’re werewolves. We’ve got all the time in the world.”

“Life’s too short to not like yourself. And with that wonderful line of wisdom I’m definitely keeping in my pocket to use again, I’ve got to go.”

“You’re looking a bit fancier than you usually do for some time in your studio.”

“Going to this group creating thing where we all work on our own projects and can chat and drink wine. It’s my first time, so we’ll see. Some of the artists there I love. Some of them are, well, a little bit tougher to like, but I’m going to be on my best behavior.”

“Unless you have more than two glasses of wine. Then snarky Wil comes out. I like snarky Wil.”

”Nope. We’re keeping her locked up tight tonight. She’s a hoot, but we’re being good tonight.”

They said their goodbyes, and cleaner, happier, and with a cat on their lap, Jo picked up their phone to thank Krista and tell her about what happened, but their thumb hovered over the contact list because there was someone else they wanted to tell more first.

Calling June probably would have been better, but Jo knew they would sit there and find reasons to never call so, instead, they planned to send the longest text message in human history.

Hey! Hope you’re having fun on your honeymoon and not getting sunburned

You never did learn to reapply your sunscreen

You were always red like a tomato after our beach trips. Gross.

Jo took a deep breath and let it out slowly, counting to four as they did.

Anyway, Cass and I kissed last night.

Why is that special? Well, I’ve got some stuff to tell you.

If June was going to be a part of their life again, and if Cass was going to be a big part of that life, then Jo knew that June needed to know everything. It would have been fine to pretend, after all, they ended up dating anyway, but Jo didn’t want to keep lying to their sister.

So, they started at the beginning with the almost kiss in the tent and caught June up on all the details up until last night. Somewhere in the back of their mind, Jo knew that sending a ton of messages that were incredibly long was beyond silly, but saying all this out loud would have been harder.

They pressed send on the final message and immediately went back to their list of text messages to select Krista and think about something else, but a new text popped up before they could click on her name.

You’re such a weirdo. But thanks for telling me.

Also, you two were definitely dating already, you just didn’t know it yet. I saw you two talking at dinner, off in your own little world.

You can’t tell me that wasn’t two people already in love.

Remembering that night and how Cass’ presence made Jo forget to be self-conscious and afraid to be themselves around their family made them smile.

Ha. You’re probably right.

I’m always right.

Are you sunburned already?

Shut up.

That’s a yes.

Next it was time to tell Krista. Instead of a wall of text, Jo sent one short message and waited for the call or texts with a bunch of exclamation points that would come next.

We kissed. For real this time.