Page 44
Story: Done Waiting
43
THE STALKER
T he look on my woman’s face devastates me. In a span of seconds, betrayal turned to shock, the pain in her honey eyes nearly bringing me to my knees.
A forceful breath leaves her lips as she angrily shakes her head. Crossing her arms over her chest, she grinds her teeth together.
“Let me get this straight.” Her posture snaps straight as her eyes blaze with fire. “The connection you claimed you felt the first time you saw me… It was a fucking lie. You played me, causing me to fall for you so you could…” Her chest heaves as she struggles for composure, blinking rapidly.
“Maddie, it’s not like that. I know how it looks—
“Do you?” She snaps, her gaze darting to mine, then quickly moving away. “The way I see it, this was an elaborate game to get revenge on my mom.”
“She hurt me, Maddie. Betrayed me.”
“I get that,” she snaps, her face turning red from her anger. She moves further away from me, taking my heart with her. “The fact that she did that to you sickens me. But I… I was innocent, Jagger. You didn’t know me, and you planned to hurt me simply because I was her daughter.”
Hanging my head, I stare at the floor. This is what Jason warned me about . I thought I could reason with her. Make her see the reason I wanted—needed—revenge.
None of that matters now. I could give a shit less about anything except making things right with her. “Maddie, let me explain.”
“ Explain ?” Her voice is as brittle as a broken bone. “Do you honestly think you can explain whatever plan you came up with to hurt me?” She shakes her head, resentment in her laugh. “Tell me, Jagger. What did you plan to do to me? Kidnap me? Cut me up? Kill me?”
I move toward her. “The details don’t matter, Maddie.”
She holds up a hand, tears spilling down her cheeks like a river. “They don’t? Maybe not to you. But right now, you’re no fucking better than Ben.”
My head snaps back as though she slapped me. Anger fills me, and I clench my fists and jaw. I’m in her personal space in a flash, gripping her chin roughly. The surprise in her eyes changes to fear as I sneer at her. “I’m nothing like Ben. You fucking know that. To compare me to him is asinine.” The vein near my temple throbs as I struggle to control my temper. “All I’ve done is fucking protect you. My actions should show you exactly who I am.” Releasing her chin, my steps are heavy as I pace across the floor, betrayal making my voice rough and thick as I spin around, my gaze locking on hers. “When the fuck has he ever protected you?”
Her fear morphs into anger, her hands clenching into fists at her sides. “How the hell do I know you didn’t protect me from him so that you could hurt me?”
I reel back as though she slapped me. Stomping over to her, my breaths rasp in and out of my chest like I’ve just run a mile. “You’re fucking kidding me, right? Have I ever hurt you since you’ve been here? Done anything to you that you haven’t wanted me to do?”
She takes a step back, shaking her head. “No, you haven’t.” Her voice is quiet, her next words like knives through my heart. “How do I know you aren’t going to hurt me? Just because you haven’t, doesn’t mean—”
“If I wanted to hurt you, I would have already done so,” I bellow, my chest heaving from the anger that burns inside my veins. “You would have been tied up, tortured, and then killed in a day after being here. Just like the others I’ve slain.” Stepping closer, my chest bumps into hers. “I’ve killed drug dealers. Police officers. Judges. Lawyers. The fucking mayor .” Jabbing my finger in her face, adrenaline courses through my body, making it twitch. “I didn’t waste any time before torturing and killing them. I sure as fuck didn’t bring them here to my house. Cook them food. Care for them.”
She blinks rapidly, staring at me with her wide, doe eyes. I’m too enraged for them to affect me like they normally do.
My heart squeezes inside my chest painfully. “I told you that I’ve never had a woman in my bedroom, let alone my bed. Yet I’ve slept in my bed beside you despite the nightmares that plague me.” Shame fills me as I realize I misjudged her. I thought she was loyal. That she fucking loved me like she claimed she did.
I lash out at her, my jaw aching from the bitterness coursing beneath my skin. “I even fucking moved your clothes to the closet in my bedroom.”
Her eyes widen as her mouth opens slightly, shock making her speechless. She leans against the fireplace mantle as though she needs something to support her.
“That’s right. I planned to show you after we had dinner.” Tilting my head downward and glaring at her, I slowly shake my head. “You disappointed me, Madison.”
She flinches, the suspicion replaced by hurt.
“You know who I am, Maddie. I’ve never pretended to be someone I’m not. I didn’t tell you what I had originally planned for you because it was shot all to hell when I realized I was in love with you. I’d never hurt you… and the fact that you lump me in the same category as Ben is like a fucking knife through my heart.”
Tears flowed down her cheeks. “I-I’m s-s-sorry.” Then she spins, running back to the spare bedroom where she first stayed, slamming the door.
My chest tightens as I stare at the spot she once stood. I know what I originally intended to do to her was wrong. But how I’ve cared for her should show more than my words could ever say about my intentions. I’ve treated her with love and respect.
And this is how she repays me.
Bitterness courses through me as my feet trudge to my fridge. Ripping the door open, I reach in, angrily snagging a beer. Slamming the door shut, I spin around and lean against it. Twisting it open, I take a long pull.
My eyes landed on the vegetables I was cutting for dinner. With a sense of obligation, I head over to it. My appetite is long gone, but Maddie may be hungry. Even if she’s not, she needs to eat.
Setting my beer on the counter, I grab the knife I used when Ben called and throw it in the sink. Opening a drawer, I grab another one, then finish chopping the vegetables. I work rapidly, fueled by frustration, until I have all the ingredients ready for the oven.
Putting the steaks, potatoes, and vegetables in the oven, I set the timer and then grab my beer. Throwing a pair of sneakers on, I head outside through the patio doors.
Staring at the gloomy gray skies, my thoughts are in turmoil. Tilting my beer to my lips, I take another long pull.
I fucked up. But I’d never hurt Maddie.
Her words echo inside my head. “ But right now, you’re no fucking better than Ben .”
Leaning against the railing, my head lowers, moodily staring at the lake behind my house. Because of the rain that rolled through earlier, a foggy mist swirls over the water, matching my morose mood.
Pulling out my phone, I call Jason. “What’s up, Jagger?”
“Everything went to shit.”
“What happened?”
I snort. “Fucking Ben sent a video. He was torturing a woman that looked like Maddie. Cut her tits off, man. It’s fucking sickening.” My fingers swipe over my phone, sending the horrifying video to him and Bryce.
“What a sick bastard.” Jason’s voice is full of disgust.
“Maddie saw it. I went out for a cigarette and gave her my phone so she could text Abby. Of course, the fucker sent it while she was texting.”
“Oh, hell. How did she react?”
“Flipped out. Rightfully so.” I realized I had forgotten to grab my jacket and I desperately needed a cigarette. Turning around, I hurry inside and grab it, my gaze sweeping the room. No sign of Maddie. With a sigh, I head back outside, pulling my jacket on as I go.
“I’m sorry, brother.”
Reaching into my pocket, my hand closes around my pack of cigarettes. “It gets worse.”
“I’m afraid to fucking ask.”
“Ben called while I was making dinner. Ran his mouth, as did I. Then the asshole said, ‘I will have her. She’s part of my plan… Just like she’s a part of yours .”
“How the hell does the bastard know what you planned?”
“No idea. I’m trying to figure that one out. The asshole has researched me, that’s for sure.”
Jason’s door slams, and I hear his footsteps as he moves across his deck. “Did Maddie ask?”
“Is the grass green?” I retort sarcastically. With Jason on speakerphone, I set it on the railing beside my beer, light my cigarette, and inhale a long drag. Exhaling, I say, “Of course she did. I told her she was a part of my plan to destroy the one person who hurt me more than anyone. Then I confessed her mother was the social worker who betrayed me.”
“Fuck. And then?”
I go into everything that transpired, my chest aching as I grab my beer and finish it.
“Jagger, I know everything is fucked up right now.” He hesitates, probably choosing his words carefully. “Put yourself in Maddie’s shoes for a moment. Shock after shock just kept coming her way tonight. First, the video. Then the fucker called, threatening her. He drops a bombshell that you had nefarious plans for her.” His lighter flicks, and he inhales a long drag, then exhales before he speaks. “I chatted with Maddie the day you flipped out and Bryce and Abby went outside with you. She loves you, brother. More than she ever fucking loved anyone . Hearing that you intended to hurt her had to cut her like a blade through the heart.”
My heartbeat slows, and there’s a painful tightening in my throat. “I know. But I fucking love her, Jason.” Tears are in my eyes. “It was fucking stupid to want to hurt her to get back at her mom, especially without knowing her . Now that I do, I realize she’s the exact fucking opposite of her mother.” My laugh is brittle. “It was a piss poor plan. The fucking Ice Queen cares more about the drugs she’s moving through the town than her damn daughter.” My fingers wrap around the neck of the bottle, and I squeeze so tightly I’m surprised it doesn’t break. I take a long pull from my beer, finishing it.
My hands shake as I continue. “I had Bryce do some checking for me. He knows an officer on the force. No one was aware Maura’s daughter was missing because the Ice Queen hadn’t said one fucking word. She should be up in arms, actively investigating her disappearance, assigning others on the force to search for her.” Rage fills me, and I grab the empty bottle, throwing it against a tree and watching it shatter. “She hasn’t assigned one fucking person to investigate her daughter’s disappearance. Yet, when I had Bryce check that warehouse I got stabbed in, she has guards all over that and is in constant contact with them.”
“What a cold-hearted bitch.” Jason mutters, disbelief evident in his voice. “Poor Maddie. She’s the sweetest person. How can her mom not be combing the world over for her.” He pauses, the flick of his cigarette lighter coming through the phone.
My hand clenches into a fist as I take another drag from my cigarette. “I’d like to wring that bitch’s neck with bare hands. She’s got a fucking amazing daughter, the best person I’ve ever met, and she’s not worried about her ?” Murderous thoughts fill my head, and I imagine tying the Ice Queen up in the town square, lighting her on fire, then burning her and the whole fucking corrupt town to the ground. “I’d be destroying everything if Maddie disappeared like that.”
“How the fuck is her mother not frantic over her whereabouts? Christ, she’s a detective with many resources at her disposal.”
“I don’t know, Jason. Sure, it’s good for me that the Ice Queen isn’t searching for her. But what if I hadn’t intervened when Maddie saw Ben killing that girl? Ben could have stolen Maddie, tortured her, then killed her, and her fucking mother would be completely oblivious.” My jaw is clenched so hard I’m surprised I don’t break any teeth as I stare into the woods surrounding the lake.
“That bitch needs to die .” Jason’s voice is full of rage that it trembles on the last word.
Huffing out a long, low sigh, my thick, emotionally choked voice is full of defeat. “But I can’t.” My shoulders slump. “If I kill the Ice Queen without Maddie’s consent, it will only drive a wedge further between us. And it’s doubtful Maddie would want me to kill her. She has too big of a heart.”
The fight we just had circulates through my mind, over and over again. My lips quiver, and tears slide down my face. “I hate that there’s a distance between us. I should have come clean before now.”
“What good would that have done, Jagger? She still would’ve been hurt. And she didn’t know and trust you then like she does now. The two of you would have imploded before you ever got started.”
“We’re imploding now.” I wipe the tears from my eyes. The pain is so intense inside my chest I feel like I’m having a damn heart attack. “I just… I fucking love her so much, Jason. I hate that I hurt her. And I don’t feel any better than Ben. When she compared me to him, saying I’m no better…” I feel like shit. Like all the awful things I’d be called over the years, especially by my father. Conjuring him up inside my head, his voice yelling at me that I’m “worthless” flows through my head. My hand grips my hair, tugging at my scalp.
“I know it feels bad right now, Jagger. But the two of you will work it out.”
I huff out a breath. “I don’t know, Jason.” Tears fall from my eyes as I lift my head, my eyes unfocused. Finishing my cigarette, I put it out beneath the toe of my sneaker, my heart feeling like the crushed cigarette butt beneath my shoe. “She hates me.”
Jason’s voice is firm. “Maddie doesn’t hate you. She’s just angry and upset.”
“He’s right.” Maddie’s soft voice comes from behind me. I spin around, startled to find her standing there. She slowly approaches me, her bare feet carrying her across the deck. “Jason’s right. I’m upset. But I don’t hate you.” Her lips tremble, sorrow darkening her honey orbs. “I could never hate you. You mean too much to me.”
“Hi, Maddie,” Jason yells, his words rushed. “Jagger, I’m hanging up. Talk to your woman.” The line goes dead before I can respond.
She stops in front of me, tilting her head. “I came out here when I couldn’t find you inside. I overheard what you said to Jason.”
My voice is a hoarse whisper. “Which part?”
She reaches up, wiping the tears from my face. “Starting with you telling Jason how much you love me. And everything after, including that I’m different from my mom.” Her head lowers to her chest, her voice quiet. Embarrassed. “And that my mom isn’t worried about me.”
My hand automatically reaches for hers, pulling her closer to me. I study her face intently, hating what I see there. “Are you okay? I mean, I know that had to hurt, hearing that.”
She bites her lip, her cheeks red when she looks up at me. There’s a glimmer in her eyes as a small smile pulls her lips up. Her other hand slides up my bare chest, which is exposed since I never bothered zipping up my jacket despite the cold air blowing around me. I was numb to it, too worried about her.
Releasing her lip, her honey orbs are filled with sorrow. “I said horrible things to you earlier that hurt you deeply.” She shakes her head in amazement, blonde locks tumbling over her shoulders. “Yet, you’re still worried about me.”
My other hand comes up, cupping her face. “I always worry about you, Maddie. You’re my priority.” I can’t stop inhaling her scent, nor can I stop my eyes from drinking in her beautiful face. It’s stupid how much I missed her when she fled, locking herself in the spare bedroom. The door was like a mountain between us, and I fucking hated it.
I can’t lose her and fight like hell to keep her.
“I’m not going anywhere,” she whispers as if she can read my thoughts. “I hurt you. You hurt me. We’ll work through this. There’s no alternative. I love you too damn much to let anything or anyone come between us.” Her gaze hardens. “That includes Ben. And my fucking Ice Queen mother.”
I can’t help the smile that splits my face. “You just used my nickname for your mom.”
She grins, a laugh blooming from her chest. “It’s fitting. She is a fucking Ice Queen.”
“Yes, she is.” I slide my hand into the fall of her hair. “Can I hug—”
Her hand slides from my chest to the back of my neck as she throws herself against me, her other hand leaving mine as she wraps it around me. I hold her, one arm pressed against her lower back, the other tangled in her blonde hair, relieved tears filling my eyes.
“I love you so damn much, Jagger. And I’m sorry for what happened inside.”
I bury my face in her hair, squeezing her tighter. “I love you with all of me, baby girl. I’m sorry, too.”
She trembles in my arms, her fingers stroking the back of my neck. “I love it when you call me baby girl. It makes me feel like things are going to be okay.”
“You’re always my baby girl.” Pulling back slightly, I smile at her. “We love each other too much to not fight for us. As long as we choose to work through our problems, we’ll be just fine.”
She nods. “I’ll always choose you. Choose us . I can’t live my life without you.” Closing her eyes, she heaves out a sigh. When she opens them, she says, “I understand why you wanted to hurt… my mother .” She spits out the word, disgust twisting her face. “When you first began stalking me, you didn’t know I was the girl from the park. You didn’t know me . It’s natural to assume I’m like her.” She shivers, revulsion on her face.
“But you’re not remotely like her.” My eyes are full of my love for her when I say, “You aren’t like anyone I’ve ever met. You’re unique. And mine .”
Maddie grins. “I’ve always been the opposite of her. It’s why she and I aren’t close.” She gives me a sad smile. “For the average person, your plan was sound. Go after the one thing she should care about. Her daughter.” She heaves out a breath. “But she’s not like most mothers. There’s always been a distance between us. One I could never build a bridge high or long enough to climb.”
I cup her face. “You never have to worry about that with me. I’d never let any distance stand in the way of us. No mountain or river could keep me from you.”
A smile breaks across her face. “I know.” Her hand slides to my heart that beats beneath my leather jacket. “I’m yours, Jagger. I’ve been yours since our eyes locked outside my childhood bedroom window. I didn’t know it yet.”
I wrap her in my arms, my heart beating in time with hers. “I’ve been yours since I met you at the park, and you called me your dark hero.”
“I stand corrected. That was the first time I became yours.” Her face clouds over. “But you were right, Jagger. Those things you said inside. You’ve never hurt me.” She ducks her head, but I see the tears that run down her face, reminding me of the rain running down the windowpanes of my cabin earlier. “I have so many regrets over what I said to you in the kitchen.”
Tilting her face to mine, my fingers wipe them away. “I hate that I made you cry.”
“I made you cry, too. I saw it.” Her voice is a gentle whisper. “It killed me inside to be responsible for your tears.”
“I couldn’t have said that any better.” Pressing my lips to her forehead, my heart is full of all the love I feel for her.
When my lips leave, she tilts her head to mine. “I want you to take me inside and hold me in front of the fire.” Her expression darkens. “Then I want you to tell me what shit my Ice Queen of a mother is involved in. And I want you to promise me one thing.”
“What’s that?”
“If I grant you permission to end my bitch of a mother, you damn well better do it. Do you promise?”
A smile lights up my face. “You promise me it won’t drive a wedge between us? Because nothing in this world is more important to me than you .”
She blinks, tears shimmering on her lashes. A smile curls her lips up. “Nothing is more important than you, Jagger. You’re my entire world.” Murderous rage is in her eyes. “My fucking mother hurt you. She nearly destroyed your life. No one fucks with my man like that. I don’t give a shit if they’re related to me or not.”
“Baby girl.” Wonder and awe fill me, leaving me speechless.
“You’re mine , and I’ll always defend you.”
My lips find hers, the heat of our kiss searing me. She moans against my lips before a breathless whimper escapes her. My arms cage her in.
When I finally pull back, I shake my head. “For so long, revenge was all that sustained me. Gave me something to live for.” My hands slide down, cupping her ass. “But now… you’re all I live for.”
She shakes her head. “You’re wrong about that, Jagger. Revenge kept you going, but you lived for me since you were a kid.” She bathes me in the warmth of her smile. Her face lights up, brightening my world, changing it from gray to a whirlwind of colors.
“I stand corrected. You’re right. I’ve always lived for you.” With a smile, I shift my weight, scooping her into my arms. She giggles, her arms wrapping around my neck. “Let’s get you inside before you freeze. We can eat dinner by the fire and talk.”
“I’d like that.”
She presses her lips to mine again, and I lose all sense of reason.
Of time.
Of everything except her .
Table of Contents
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- Page 44 (Reading here)
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