Page 8 of Deranged (Killers Inc. #3)
Henry wasn’t insulted or angry. Beau didn’t say anything he hadn’t already thought.
He just didn’t know how to explain the shift that had happened when he watched Zeus leave that room.
Then he stood on the sidelines while Field tried to give everyone the happiness he didn’t have—like apologizing for being broken.
The icing on the cake was the moment Henry thought Field was about to blow his brains out on the back lawn—calmly.
Like it meant nothing to anyone. No matter what Field said, Henry still believed that had been his intention.
It was like he filled Henry with purpose.
That was something he hadn’t felt in a long time.
Once Henry had opened the door to that emotion, others had poured in. Now he couldn’t stop.
“He won’t be getting anywhere near the grave anytime soon, if I have anything to say about it.”
“That’s good to hear. I gather Kylo would be upset if anything happened to him.”
That didn’t surprise Henry. Kylo loved everyone. “You don’t have anything to worry about.”
“I’ll be upset if anything happens to you.”
He genuinely loved Beau. No one could understand how important Beau was to him.
Blood had nothing to do with it. Beau was his brother.
“No matter what happens, I’m asking you to stay out of it.
You’re right. He’s got issues. I can handle whatever comes at me.
He doesn’t deserve to have anything else come at him. Likely, that includes me.”
Beau leaned back in his chair again. “I’m not very good at staying out of things.”
“But you will for me.”
Beau chuckled. “Of course. I have no desire to kick a kid while he’s down.”
Henry cringed inside at Beau calling Field a kid, even though he had done it too. He also fought the urge to point out Field was nearly the same age as Kylo and Beau was two years older than him. It was basically the same gap in ages.
Kylo knocked on the open door. “Are you finished for the night? It’s time for Clay to clock out.”
Clay wasn’t like Mickey. He didn’t make an enormous salary and work as much as needed. It really wasn’t fair to expect him to stick by Kylo all night.
Beau pushed his chair back. “Yeah. Sorry. We lost track of time. Come here.” He patted his knee.
Kylo happily moved to sit on Beau’s lap and leave Clay free to disappear. After stealing a kiss, Kylo focused on Henry. “I just saw Field heading outside with a blanket.”
Damn. The gossip mill had run its course. It looked like everyone knew about them. Henry stood. “That sounds like something I should’ve been invited to do.”
Beau laughed. “Yeah. You should go check on that. I’m busy.”
Henry shook his head as he left the couple alone. His earlier statement stood. He was damn glad to see Beau like this. It didn’t take him long to find the subject of his happiness on the back lawn, sans gun this time, thankfully.
“Hey. I wondered how long it would take you to find me.”
Henry dropped to the ground and settled on his back at Field’s side, mimicking his pose. “I’m pretty good at tracking, and you have an obsession with stars.”
Field’s hand found his. Their fingers linked. “I can tell you’ve never been locked in a prison cell for any period of time.”
Henry always had to choose his words with Field, hoping Field wouldn’t shut him out. “I never heard that about your group.”
“That’s because it was only me.” Field looked his way. Their gazes met and held. “Some people are harder to break than others, but everyone eventually does.”
Henry scooted closer until Field got the hint and used him as a pillow. He wanted Field to talk to him. “Is Russia the only country to run this kind of program?”
“Not by a long shot. When we decided to open our business, it meant delving into some shady corners to spread the word. We learned all sorts of crazy shit. Did you know several countries run programs to turn kids into assassins? Unlike us, where we were meant to blend and be ready for every scenario, they were taught to live in the shadows and kill. That’s it.
From what I understand, we were lucky compared to them. ”
“I’ve heard about that. The guy we hired to build onto the property is married to one.”
Field turned his head. “Seriously?”
Henry needed Field to know people could heal. “Yeah. Beyond seeing nothing while taking jobs from people like us, I gather they live a pretty normal life.”
“Sounds nice.”
Henry kissed Field’s forehead before responding. “Normal looks different for everyone. Theirs is a house in upstate New York and spoiling their kids. Maybe yours is being kicked back under the stars, talking about what’s normal.”
“Maybe.” Field’s hand slid across Henry’s stomach. “Hey, how much do you know about the stars?”
“Next to nothing. Why don’t you fill me in?”
Henry shut down his mind and focused on Field’s every word.
He studied every nuance of him while Field spoke like a sugared-up kid about something he obviously loved.
It hit Henry. This was what he had felt missing from him for years now.
It wasn’t a regular sexual partner or anything along that line.
He wanted this. Like Beau, he just wasn’t certain Field would live long enough for him to enjoy it.