Page 15 of Deranged (Killers Inc. #3)

Shadow waited until the house fell completely silent.

Clay made his pass down the hall, and Shadow counted his steps.

He knew exactly how many it would take for him to be out of sight.

Shadow slipped open his door just in time to see Field pass.

He didn’t look right or left. He had nothing with him but his gun.

Shadow’s heart fell. He quietly set his bag aside and grabbed his second emergency kit before following.

Shadow had been named Shadow for a reason, and not just his ability to stay glued to Rain.

He could move like a shadow, silent and completely unnoticed.

Shadow used his skills like second nature to keep pace with Field undetected.

Field didn’t make it easy. His clipped pace was a man who knew his mind and destination.

He cut through the garage, heading for the back lawn.

Shadow stuck to him. At the backyard, he kept going until he made his way into the forest area surrounding them.

It got easier for Shadow to mask his steps by staying in time with Field.

Finally, Field stopped at a clearing and looked up at the sky.

He moved to the closest tree and sat with his back leaned against the trunk.

When he set the gun on the grass beside him, Shadow moved.

He held out the jar of peanut butter and spoon he held.

A sad smile touched Field’s lips as he accepted.

“Do you have me tagged or something?”

Shadow dropped to the grass to sit next to him. “No. I saw you leaving when I was.” He plucked a blade of grass and tossed it.

“Done with us, huh?”

“I’ll answer that question if you do.”

When Field responded, his voice sounded dead. “There’s only one way Henry will let me go. He has to let me go. I can’t do this to him.”

For a moment, Shadow held his tongue. He couldn’t say he didn’t understand, but he kind of didn’t. Field actually had someone ready to walk through hell with him. It was bullshit he planned to destroy everything.

He couldn’t take it. “That’s the dumbest shit I’ve ever heard, Field.

That man loves you. He loves you. Do you really plan to do this to him?

He won’t let it go. I can’t believe you think that for a single second.

Love isn’t something people just lose when the person they love is gone.

He’s seen the worst, and he still wants you.

You should’ve seen his face when I said I’d call Zeus.

He knew, knew he had you. That man didn’t have a single doubt you would come back to him. Don’t make a fool of him.”

Field tilted his chin up and looked at the sky. “How long do you think it’ll take for him to get sick of this? When he’s done, it’ll kill me.”

Shadow shrugged. “Then let it. Dying before the worst happens is ridiculous. You owe him more than this. Trust him. He doesn’t look like an idiot to me. He doesn’t look weak. Trust the love.”

Field opened the peanut butter and took a bite. He passed the spoon Shadow’s way. While Shadow scooped out a bite, Field turned the tide.

“You won’t be helping by leaving.”

Shadow licked the spoon and handed it back. “Henry has you. Rain has Austen. No one needs me any longer.”

Field used the puppy dog eyes on him. “I still need you. You’re my best friend. I’ll always need you.”

Shadow’s shoulders fell. Truthfully, he didn’t require that much convincing. Still. “Everyone is falling apart. It won’t be long now. The group will split and then we’ll die. I know you see it too.”

“Yeah.” He put the lid back on the jar. “We need a family meeting.” His adorable face turned Shadow’s way again. “At least stay until we have a chance to talk things over with the family. If everyone decides to go different ways, then we’ll revisit this.”

“Does that mean you’re going back to the house?”

“Are you?”

Shadow fully understood his answer would be Field’s too. If Shadow decided to skip out, Field was done with this life. Shadow stood. “Come on. Let’s get back before anyone comes looking for us.”

Field blew out a tired-sounding breath, but he stood. Side by side, they retraced their steps to the house. Shadow wouldn’t leave tonight. He couldn’t promise about tomorrow. Things were too hard.

Field had been one hundred percent ready to set Henry free. He hadn’t been ready to never see him again, though. That thought hurt his chest. Shadow was always talking him down. He prayed Shadow didn’t leave or next time would be the time Field didn’t return.

They made it to the upstairs landing before getting caught. Henry rushed from the bedroom—shirtless, jeans barely on, unbuttoned and ready to fall. He looked panicked as hell. Guilt struck him hard enough to take his breath.

He drew up short when he spotted them. Shadow leaned close and swapped the peanut butter jar for the gun behind their backs.

“Where did you go? You scared the shit out of me.”

Field held up the peanut butter. “I couldn’t sleep. We had a snack.”

Henry swiped a shaky hand across his face, looking ready to drop from fear. Field saw it. He couldn’t leave Henry. Shadow was right. Henry wouldn’t let go. Losing Field would haunt him to the end of his days if Field couldn't find a way to hack it. Field had to do better.

Field looked Shadow’s way. “Love you. Thank you for keeping me company.”

Shadow smiled. “Of course. Love you too. Goodnight, guys.” He dipped into his room, leaving Field to handle Henry.

Field closed the distance between them and took Henry’s hand.

He led Henry back to bed, undressing him before doing the same and joining him.

“I’ve been thinking we should move my things to your place.

That’s what I talked to Shadow about.” He didn’t feel the least bit guilty about the blatant lie.

Henry could never know what Field had really done.

Henry dragged him into his arms and held on like he had thought he wouldn’t get to again. Field couldn’t leave him. “Whatever you want to do. I just want to be wherever you are.”

“What you want matters too. But I think I’m disturbing the peace around here and I don’t want that. It’s obvious you can handle me when I flip out, so maybe we should move things to where I won’t wake up the entire household when shit goes south.”

Henry kissed his forehead. Field felt him smile against his skin. “There’re other reasons I could make you wake up the household, but I always try to be a little respectful. At my place, I could do those things.”

He really loved this man. Henry truly acted like Field was normal and they had the same life as any other couple about to marry. “Do you plan to make me scream, Zaddy?”

Henry’s body shook on a chuckle.

Field couldn’t stop smiling. “I can’t wait to be your husband.”

Henry rolled, pinning Field beneath him. He looked intense. “Do you really mean that?”

Henry’s reaction confused him. “Yeah. Do you not want me to mean it?”

“I kind of thought—maybe—you only said yes to humor me.”

The unsure way Henry spoke was a tone Field hadn’t heard in a while.

“Why would you think that? You’re everything to me.

If you wanted me to walk into fire, I would.

You wanting to keep me forever feels like a fever dream.

In fact, I kind of think I should marry you as fast as possible before you snap out of it. ”

The way Henry smiled was everything. “I know I say it so much, you’re probably sick of hearing it, but I really fucking love you. You’re my miracle. My other half. I gave up hope of ever finding you.”

“Well, I mean, you had to wait for me to grow up.”

Henry groaned and dropped his forehead on Field’s shoulder. Field couldn’t stop laughing. They had a bit of an age gap, but Field never thought about it. He just enjoyed fucking with Henry.

“I’ll be an old man on a walker and all the hot young guys will be chasing you.” Henry didn’t lift his head as he made the claim, so Field couldn’t tell if he was truly worried about that or not.

Either way, Field couldn’t let him. “Don’t worry. I can outrun them on my mobility scooter.”

Henry laughed. His head lifted and his eyes swam with happiness. “We’ll have a good life.”

“I know.” He did. They were amazing together. How could they be anything less than perfection? Henry had promised they would be.