Page 27

Audrey

“O nly two days left,” Brenden comments as he takes my hand. “Are you excited?”

It’s hard to believe we’ve almost made it to Wren’s final. Soon, Michael will spend the rest of his afterlife being tortured in Tartarus. At least that’s what Cassian has assured me will happen.

He seems to think he’ll have no problem convincing Ophelia, and maybe even Sol, to send his soul there once Wren delivers his soul to the ferryman. He says Ophelia has always had a soft side for those seeking vengeance against those who wronged them. He and Sol have sided with her quite a few times when they’re met with a soul that’s been blackened by vengeance. They’ve sent some souls meant for Tartarus to The Asphodel Meadows instead, allowing the spirit to be reborn.

He told me they’ve only had to send one onto Tartarus after they’ve been given a second chance, so it sounds like they’re doing more good than harm. Plus, if it helps get Michael sent to where he belongs, you won’t find me complaining.

I don’t answer him right away, my eyes falling to the items at the next booth we pass. I dragged him to the market in Ephonia this afternoon so I could get some space from my other mates.

Not that I think they’re really giving it to me. I swore I saw Donovan and Wraith a few minutes ago, but when I turned around to double-check, they weren’t there. I know I saw Cassian this morning, but since he still mostly lives here, I didn’t really think anything of it. Not until the third time I saw him.

At least they’re giving me some semblance of space.

As we grow closer to D-day, things have gotten tenser at the house. I know Wraith and Cassian would prefer if I gave up on killing Michael, but I just can’t. Donovan and Brenden are just as blood-thirsty as I am, so I don’t even know if they could be convinced not to kill him if I changed my mind.

Not only do I feel like I owe it to Wren, but there’s this little voice in the back of my head that never stops thinking about killing him. I didn’t even realize it was there until Wraith and I were talking the other night. He asked me why it was so important that I killed Michael. I immediately started to explain like I always do, and he stopped me. He told me to think about it and then come back to him.

It was overall a very weird conversation, but it got me to do what he wanted. I sat and thought about it for a long while, forcing myself to look beyond the fact that he took my sister away from me before he killed me and then killed her. Obviously, those all played a factor in my reasoning, but eventually, I heard that little voice loud and clear.

It didn’t provide me with a reason he needed to be dead. It just insisted repeatedly that I end it—that I kill him and end it all. It still doesn’t make sense to me, but when I mentioned it to Wraith, he found it odd as well. He also had no idea why it would be there and so intent on one purpose—almost as if it had been placed there.

He wanted to call the whole damn thing off right then and there, but I shut that shit down real quick.

I don’t care why I have a mysterious voice in my head urging me to do the one thing I want to, but I’m not worried. Just because I don’t understand it doesn’t mean I need to fear it. Wraith believes otherwise.

That’s probably why they’re following me around now. I’m not sure what they think is going to happen, but they clearly don’t trust me on my own.

Whatever.

“I don’t think excited is the word I would use,” I finally answer. “I’m ready for it to be done and over with, but as much as I want him dead, I know this is a serious matter. Taking a life is no little thing—not something for me to get excited about. But I’m definitely ready for it to be done and over with so we can focus on more important matters.”

“Like Nex.”

I glance up at Brenden with a frown, not liking how off he sounds. His face gives nothing away as he smiles, but something is bothering him. “What is it, Brenden?”

His smile falls away as he glances away from me. “How can you forgive him? After the way he’s treated you?”

“I don’t know if I can,” I admit, biting my lip as I glance around us. “For all I know, he’ll keep denying me, even if Lucifer lifts the curse or admits there never was one. I know all of you think he wants me, but I’m just not sure if that’s true. I refuse to allow myself to hope for anything when it comes to Nex. I can’t think about what might happen. I just…don’t have the spoons for it.”

He hums. “I’m so angry with him, but I also miss him. I don’t like it. I’m just as obsessed with him as I am with you, and I’m not used to denying myself when it comes to my obsession. It’s taking more restraint than I’d like to admit. I’ve always been more of a take what I want and damn the consequences kind of guy—as I’m sure you’ve figured out. But with him, I can’t do that because it feels like I’m betraying you if I do.”

“I’ve told you I don’t—“

“Care. I know. But it doesn’t feel right to me.” He snickers. “I’m not even sure when I started worrying about something being right. It’s…weird. Being here with you and the others—it’s changed me. I don’t think that’s necessarily a bad thing, but I’m not used to it.”

That brings a smile to my face. “Awww, you’re growing up.”

“Shut up, brat.” He doesn’t bother hiding his smile. “They have hotels here, don’t they?”

“I have no idea. Why would I know that? And what does it have to do with the conversation we were having?”

He chuckles. “It has nothing to do with our conversation. I was just thinking maybe we could grab one for the night. It’s been a hot minute since it was just the two of us.”

Oh. He needs it to be just the two of us, but he’d never ask that of me. Brenden’s never been one to keep me from my other mates, which I love about him, but if this is what he needs, then I’ll gladly give it to him.

“Yeah, we can do that. We should let the others know. And maybe ask where we can find a place to stay since neither of us knows.”

I grab my phone from my back pocket and pull up our group chat.

AUDREY

Hey, Brenden and I were thinking about staying in Ephonia for the night.

Except we don’t know where to find a hotel.

DONOVAN

Why are you staying?

WRAITH

It doesn’t matter why they’re staying, pet.

I’ll book a room for you at my favorite place and then send you the address.

Assuming that’s okay with you.

AUDREY

That would be great, Wraith. Thank you.

As for why we’re staying—we just want to.

DONOVAN

Can I come?

brENDEN

No.

DONOVAN

I don’t like this.

CASSIAN

You can come stay with me.

WRAITH

Or you can stay at the house with us.

CASSIAN

Is that a good idea?

WRAITH

We have to try it sometime.

Trouble, the name of the hotel is The Hellfire Lounge.

The address is 6425 Sinner Highway.

AUDREY

Thank you! Have fun with your sleepover.

CASSIAN

And you have fun with yours.

I tuck my phone back into my shorts as Brenden comes to a stop. “We can head there whenever. Since I have the address, I can shadow walk us there. I’ve gotten really good at it since I started reaping.”

When he doesn’t respond, I lift my eyes to find him staring at something. As I follow his gaze, I realize it’s not something but someone—Nex, who’s staring right back.

“Well, that’s unexpected,” I mutter under my breath, but Brenden lowers his eyes to meet mine, and I know he heard me.

“We should just go,” he says quietly, but his eyes make their way back to Nex almost immediately.

Once again, I’m struck with guilt over keeping the two of them apart—even if it’s been their decision, it’s still because of me. Brenden can deny it until he’s blue in the face, but it doesn’t make it any less true.

I chance another glance at Nex and our gazes clash, a shiver running through me at the longing in his. I don’t know if it’s for me, Brenden, or both of us, but I don’t like it. “Or maybe you should go talk to him.”

“Why would I do that?”

I shrug, even though he’s not looking at me. “Because you want to.”

He sighs, taking my hand in his once more. “Only if you come with me.”

“That sounds like a terrible idea.” I glance between him and Nex as I bite my lip. What’s the worst that can happen? Nex is cruel to me again? It’s not like he can really hurt me anymore than he already has. “But fine.”

“Really?” Brenden tears his eyes away from Nex to glance down at me. “Honestly, I was expecting you to tell me no and then we’d carry on as if we hadn’t seen him.”

I frown. “Is that what you want to happen? Because we can do that, too.”

“I don’t know what the hell I want. I want to talk to him, but I also want to run in the opposite direction.” When he flashes me his fangs, I realize just how much this is bothering him.

“Are you hungry?”

Brenden looks confused as he frowns at the sudden subject change. “What?”

“Your fangs are out. I figured you must be hungry. Or stressed. I guess that would make more sense.”

He curses, lifting his hand to his mouth. Then he’s dragging me toward Nex.

“You.” Brenden stabs his finger into Nex’s chest.

Nex glances down at the finger in his chest before his gaze returns to Brenden and then slides to me. “What are you doing here?”

Brenden scoffs. “We’re at the market. What do you think we’re doing?”

“Oh, right.” Nex flushes. “That makes sense.”

Silence falls over us as we glance at one another. I don’t have any idea what I’m supposed to say right now. The last time Nex and I spoke, his words were cruel. I should hate him. I want to hate him, but I don’t. I don’t know if I can with the unrelenting mate bond insistently tugging at me. It wants us to be together as we’re meant to, but Nex doesn’t want that.

I wonder if it tugs at him in the same way. Does it hurt him to stand so close to me and not touch me? If it does, then how can he stand there so nonchalantly?

The silence quickly grows awkward, and I wish I was anywhere but here.

“We should—“

“I was just about to—“

I bite back a smile as the two of them speak at the same time, both cutting off.

“Go ahead,” Nex says, and Brenden shakes his head. With another glance at me, Nex takes a deep breath. “I was just going to say I’m planning to grab some dinner now that I have what I came for. Maybe the two of you would like to join me?”

“Why?” I blurt it out before I can stop myself.

He runs a hand through his dark hair, wincing. “I…I’m sorry for the things I said to you, Audrey. I didn’t mean them, but having you around all the time without being able to touch you was driving me crazy. I thought that if I could run you off, it would be easier.”

“And how did that work out for you?” Brenden asks, flashing his fangs again.

“Clearly, it didn’t work. It was a million times worse than when I was at least able to see you.” He shakes his head. “I know apologizing isn’t enough to make up for what I’ve done.”

“It sure the fuck isn’t.”

I lay a hand on Brenden’s arm, trying to calm him as he shoves himself into Nex’s face. “Stop, Brenden. I appreciate you looking out for me, but I can fight my own battles. As far as dinner goes, I’m starving. We might as well eat together, right?”

Hope flashes in Nex’s eyes as he nods. “I’d really like that.”

“Are you sure, Audrey? I don’t want you to be uncomfortable.” At my nod, Brenden sighs. “Fine. We’ll have dinner, but if you even blink the wrong way, I’m going to snap your neck.”

I glance between the two of them, trying to figure out if he’s actually threatening Nex or if he’s flirting with him. That might seem like a strange question to be asking myself, but when it comes to Brenden, it’s sometimes hard to tell. Especially if he’s as obsessed with Nex as I think he is.

Nex holds his hands up in surrender, slowly backing away. “There’s an excellent restaurant just up the road.”

“It sounds perfect. We’ll follow you.”

Nex shoots me a small smile and starts down the street. When I go to follow him, Brenden stops me.

“Are you sure about this?”

I snort. “Not at all, but it seems a bit kismet, doesn’t it? Like we were meant to run into him here. He’s not acting like an asshole like he has been. I think we need to take a chance—give him a chance. I still don’t know if I can forgive him, but if I don’t try, I’ll never know.”

“Yeah, okay.”

It doesn’t take long for us to catch up to Nex, and I have no idea what I’m doing—or thinking or feeling. I’m a fucking mess.

At least I won’t be a hungry mess after we eat, so that’s a plus. Let’s just hope this doesn’t blow up in my face.