Page 19

Audrey

A nother month has passed—both over too quickly and not moving fast enough.

We have a plan in place for killing Michael in just a few short months. Technically, fifty-six days, but I’m not counting down or anything.

“Audrey?” a voice calls out, and I lift my head from the papers I’m grading. Looking around the room, my eyes land on a man in his thirties with dark hair. I search for his name. Ah, right. Jason. “Can you come help me?”

I glance at Nex, who’s helping another student, but he isn’t paying me any attention—as per usual.

“Of course.” Standing, I make my way over to him. He’s a witch with earth magic, and he’s trying to make a seed grow. I give him a few pointers, and when the plant shoots above the soil, we both grin.

“Thank you,” Jason says softly, and I head back toward the desk at the front of the class.

A hand wraps around my wrist, stopping me. I smile down at Wren as she beams up at me. “Sit with me for a minute?”

My eyes find Nex, who’s now roaming around the room as he waits for someone to need help. His eyes steadfastly avoid both me and Wren, so I shrug and drop into the seat beside her.

As they’ve passed the four-month point, my sister’s class has shrunk down to less than ten. There’s really not much need for me to help with this class anymore. Nex is perfectly capable of handling this many students on his own, but I just can’t bring myself to stop coming.

Even if he avoids all eye contact and rarely, if ever, speaks to me. I’m still here and in his face. I won’t let him forget about me.

Is that pathetic?

Fuck, it is, isn’t it?

Shaking my head, I force myself to focus on Wren. “What’s up?”

“Are you okay?” she asks. The look she shoots me is daring me to lie to her, but what’s the point?

“Not really. I don’t like how unsettled everything feels.” My eyes find Nex once more. It’s like I can’t help myself. They’re always drawn to him—something I both love and hate. “You see how Nex acts around me. There haven’t been any major blowups between Cassian and Wraith, but it’s coming. I can feel it. Plus, waiting to get to Michael is killing me.”

Wren hums, offering me a soft smile. “You have a lot going on. No one can blame you for feeling overwhelmed. Are you at least leaning on your mates?”

“Probably not as much as I should be,” I admit. Although I don’t tell her I’ve been avoiding them fairly regularly—at least as much as I can since none of them are above stalking me.

It’s not that I don’t want to spend time with them. I love them and our time together, but everything feels off without Nex and Cassian there. It feels like parts of me are missing, and when I’m surrounded by my three bonded mates, it’s even worse. And it’s not like I can admit that to them.

I can just imagine how that conversation would go. Sorry, I love the three of you, but you’re just not enough for me.

They’d love that.

“We could hang out tonight,” Wren offers, and I shake my head.

“I wish I could, but Cassian’s coming over tonight. He has something planned for us.” I play with the ends of my hair, following Nex’s progression around the room with my eyes.

Wren waggles her eyebrows. “He does, does he? I wonder what that could be?”

I wave my hand at her, dismissing her words. I’m sure we’ll end up having sex. That’s practically a given any time I’m around my mates. We can’t seem to keep our hands off one another—except Nex, who never touches me.

I love sex just as much as anyone, but the relationships with my mates are about so much more than that. I like who they are as people, which means the world to me. I’m sure the Fates wouldn’t pair me with someone who I wouldn’t get along with, but since they fated me to one of the most stubborn demons to ever live, who the hell knows?

Yes, I’m feeling sorry for myself and the lack of relationship I have with Nex—sue me.

“I just wish he would look at me,” I mumble, but Wren catches my words, her face falling.

“I wish I could do something to help you with that.” She sighs. “Of course you’d end up with a mate even more stubborn than you.”

I’ve all but given up on speaking with him—with trying to convince him he should give us a chance. Not so much by choice but because he flees in the opposite direction every time he sees me.

Brenden assures me he’s working on it, but I’ve yet to see any progress when it comes to me. There’s been a ton of progress between Nex and Brenden. At least that’s what he tells me. They’ve made out a few times, but nothing more than that.

Not that I would hold it against Brenden if things progressed with them. Although, it makes me sick that Nex doesn’t seem to mind getting closer to Brenden when he wants nothing to do with me. Shouldn’t he be worried about what happens to Brenden with the curse?

A thought occurs to me, my gaze drifting back to Nex.

What if that is his plan? To get close to Brenden, to fall for him, and when the curse kicks in, he no longer has to worry about me or Brenden.

Holy shit. That better not be his plan. If he hurts my mate, I will eviscerate him.

“Umm…Audrey?” Wren’s voice wavers for a moment. “Why are you growling at Nex?”

Jerking my head toward her, I realize I’m baring my teeth and growling.

I cut that shit off immediately, filling Wren in on where my thoughts strayed before we both consider the man in question.

“I want to say he’d never do that,” Wren begins hesitantly, “but it totally seems like something he would do.”

“Right? If he hurts Brenden, then I don’t want anything to do with him.” I toss my hands in the air. “I know Brenden comes off a little crazy—”

“A little?” Wren snorts, covering her face when I glare at her. “I’m sorry. Please continue.”

Brushing away nonexistent lint, I continue, “He’s a little crazy, but he’s also fragile. I don’t want to think about how he’d react—what he’d do. I don’t want him to get hurt.”

Wren sighs. “But it’s okay if you’re hurt?”

“Of course I don’t want to be hurt,” I practically yell, flushing when all eyes in the room turn to me. I offer a tight smile and lower my voice before continuing. “But I already am. Plus, I’m not crazy.”

“If you say so.” Wren tosses me a smile. “I think Brenden will be fine, even if he has a few screws loose. He knows what he’s up against with that man.”

I shrug, knowing she’s right, but it doesn’t make me any less upset about the idea of Brenden being hurt. “Alright, I should get back to those papers.”

“It’s all going to work out,” Wren assures me, giving my hand one last squeeze.

As much as I’d like to believe her words, I can’t. I don’t see how this can work out. Not unless Nex gets amnesia or something.

Settling at the desk once more, I bury my hands in my hair and massage my temples. There’s a tension headache building, and I’m so not here for it. I have plans I don’t plan on missing.

“The papers aren’t going to grade themselves,” Nex snarks, glaring down at me.

“I’m well aware. Thank you.” I return his glare, wondering why he suddenly feels the need to talk to me.

“Also, if you could please refrain from interrupting my class by yelling at your sister, that would be great.” He clenches his jaw. “In fact, maybe it’s best if you just don’t talk to her during class. If she needs help, I can help her since you can’t be trusted. I’m not even sure why you’re still helping in my classes. I have no need for you, and I don’t want you around.”

I jerk my head back as if he slapped me. Where the hell had that vehement tone come from? Who the hell does he think he is?

“Why don’t you go fuck yourself?” I push to my feet, not bothering to keep my voice down. “I don’t know what crawled up your ass, but if you think I’m going to allow you to speak to me like that, you’re sadly mistaken. Did you decide ignoring me wasn’t working, so you’d be cruel? Well, I have news for you, asshole—no matter how much you don’t want it to be true, you’re still my fated mate. Go ahead and keep fighting it. You’re the one who’s going to end up alone and with no one to blame but yourself.”

I’m practically panting with anger as I lean across the desk, hands planted on the papers I’ve been grading. “As far as helping in your classes, you’re right. You don’t need me, and I sure as fuck don’t need you. But if you hurt Brenden, I’m coming for you—mate or not. I guess it’s just time to accept that you’re not worth my time and that you really are an asshole.”

Nex’s jaw drops as he stares at me in shock. Anger rattles through me, and I know I should just walk away, but I can’t seem to make my feet move. Instead, I swipe my hand across the desk, pushing everything to the floor.

It doesn’t make me feel any better.

“You finally succeeded in your quest.” My voice has gone quiet as sorrow begins to overwhelm my anger. My voice shakes as tears fill my eyes. “I don’t think I want you to be my mate anymore.”

Head held high, I stalk out of the classroom before sliding through the shadows. As soon as I land in the bedroom, I collapse to my knees as sobs wrack my body.

Rage and dejection are at war inside of me as I slam my hands onto the floor and let out a heart-wrenching scream filled with fury and pain.

Footsteps thunder up the stairs, making me realize I’m not alone in the house.

Damn it. None of my mates need to see me like this.

The door swings open to reveal Donovan, whose eyes flash when they land on me. “What the hell happened?”

I shake my head, unable to speak. I’m not strong enough to tell him what just happened. I feel like I’m shattering from the inside out, and I don’t know if I can put my pieces back together.

Who knew that giving up on my mate would hurt so badly? I certainly wasn’t expecting it.

“Fuck.” Donovan races across the room and scoops me into his arms. I wrap my arms around his neck and cling to him.

I might not be able to put myself back together again, but maybe my mates can. Maybe they can hold me together while I splinter. Maybe they’re all I really need—just the three of them.

Because if I’m accepting that Nex will never be mine, then I have to accept that neither will Cassian.

My body shakes as my tears fall faster.

I don’t know if I’m ready to accept that just yet. I don’t think I can deal with the additional pain it will cause me.

I don’t know if I can survive this.

“I’ve got you, pretty girl. Whatever happened, we’ll fix it. Lean on me. You don’t always have to be the strong one. Let me help you.”

What choice do I really have but to accept his help? I can’t do this on my own, and I don’t want to.

I bury my face in his chest, soaking his shirt, but my hellhound mate doesn’t seem to notice or care as he carries me to the bed. When he sets me down, I let out a cry and reach for him, but he’s already shushing me and crawling up beside me. He wraps me up in his arms, soothing me the best he can as I lose it.

Eventually, the tears stop falling, and I feel empty—oh, so empty. I can’t think, I can’t feel—all I can do is lie here until sleep drags me into her warm embrace.