Page 29 of Christmas Spirits at Honeywell House (Ghosts of Rowan Vale #3)

‘Seventy-five I was when I died,’ Silas told him, suddenly looking quite fierce.

‘Seventy-five years on this earth! And I spent over seventy of those years in prayer. Religious parents,’ he explained.

‘Bible forced down my throat along with the nursery food. Sunday School. Church services. Theology studies. When I became vicar of All Souls, I was so proud, Wyndham. So proud.’

‘Well…’ Aubrey tried to fathom what was going on. He’d never seen Silas like this before. ‘You had every right to be proud.’ He gazed up at the stained-glass window depicting the Adoration of the Magi. ‘It’s a beautiful church.’

‘But what did it all mean, eh?’ Silas asked.

‘What was it all for? I thought – afterwards – I’d spend eternity in heaven.

A reward for my services, as it were. Instead, here I am, stuck in this village.

The indignity of it! And with a woman vicar in that bloody pulpit every Sunday, too. An abomination! Pah!’

He got to his feet, glaring down at Aubrey as if it was all his fault. ‘So you tell me, eh? You tell me what the point of it was. What was the meaning of my life? My work? I might as well have been a coalman or a bus conductor.’

‘Or lived in a den of iniquity,’ Aubrey said wryly.

For a moment he thought Silas was going to explode, then to his relief, the old man sat down again and ran a hand through his nest of white hair.

‘How do you do it, Wyndham?’

‘Do what?’

‘How do you stay so calm? You’re always so cheerful and balanced. I’ve never seen you get angry. What’s the secret?’

‘I suppose,’ said Aubrey thoughtfully, ‘because I’m happy.

Of course, I sometimes question why I’m here.

Sometimes I think, did I do something wrong ?

But generally, I’m content with my lot. Because, you see, I have a family now, which is more than I ever had when I was alive.

I have my daughter, Florence. And I have Agnes, whom I love with all my heart.

And that,’ he added firmly, ‘is what I’m here to see you about. ’

‘Eh? What? Agnes, you mean?’

‘Yes. Now, look here, I won’t have this any longer.

All this abuse and name-calling. It just isn’t on.

Have you any idea how much you’ve upset Agnes?

She’s a lady, and this sort of thing is simply too much for her.

Why, it’s because of you she’s hiding away in Harling Hall and doesn’t want me to come into the village.

You’ve made us virtual prisoners in our own home and it’s simply not cricket.

A lady’s reputation is everything. I can shrug it off, but she can’t, and I won’t have it.

So, what are you going to do about it, eh? ’

Silas frowned. ‘What are you talking about?’

‘You know what I’m talking about,’ Aubrey said patiently. ‘The insults you hurled at us when we came into the village. The way you stood at the gates of the Hall, warning other ghosts to stay away from us. We’ve done nothing to deserve it.’

‘Yes, yes.’

‘Never mind, “yes, yes”. You won’t fob me off this time.

There has been no impropriety between Agnes and me.

Yes, we have referred to each other as husband and wife because that’s how we feel about one another.

And, of course, there’s Florence to consider now.

We wouldn’t want to shock her. But as for marital relations…

’ He cleared his throat. ‘We have separate rooms, and there has never been any suggestion of?—’

‘Oh, do shut up, Wyndham,’ Silas said with a sigh. ‘I know perfectly well that you don’t live as man and wife, even if you think of each other as such.’

‘What?’ Aubrey blinked, astonished. ‘You know?’

‘Of course I know. Didn’t your wife tell me so herself? She made it very clear what the situation was at Harling Hall, before telling me exactly what she thought of me and how utterly contemptible my behaviour had been.’

‘ Agnes did?’ Aubrey could barely take it in. ‘When was this?’

‘Oh…’ Silas shrugged. ‘I can’t really remember. Years ago, now.’ He smirked suddenly. ‘It was all rather enjoyable. She’s quite a firecracker, that one, when she gets going. I can see why you’re attracted to her. She really gave me what for.’

‘ Agnes did?’ Aubrey gasped again.

‘My dear fellow, is that all you can say? Yes, Agnes did. Stormed into the vicarage and yelled at me for at least ten minutes. Most fun I’ve had in decades.’

‘I – I didn’t know. She never said.’

‘Hmm. Maybe she didn’t want to embarrass you. Bit humiliating, after all, having to do your husband’s dirty work. You didn’t have the guts, so she did it for you.’

‘I simply thought it best to ignore you,’ Aubrey said indignantly. ‘And I have asked you to cease your vile insinuations on several occasions.’

‘Yes, all very polite and gentlemanly, I’m sure. Where was the fun in that? But Agnes, now, she knows how to put a chap in his place. You’re a lucky man.’

Aubrey was so stunned by this turn of events that he couldn’t speak. Luckily, he didn’t have to as Silas barely paused before continuing.

‘And then, just as I thought we were going to start having some proper high jinks – you know, rows in the street, that sort of thing – what did you both do? Threw in the towel and hid yourselves away in the Hall. Most disappointing. I’ve really missed you both.

That’s why I stood outside the gates when they had that ridiculous meeting for the ghosts.

I thought if I yelled loudly enough, you’d both come out to tell me off.

There you go. Let down again. Such is life – or afterlife. ’

Aubrey had no idea what to do with all this information.

The fact that Silas was now claiming he knew the truth about the Wyndhams’ relationship, and that it clearly didn’t bother him in the least but had been a way of stirring up some excitement was astounding enough… but to think that Agnes had been to see him and put him straight!

It didn’t make sense. If she’d given Silas a piece of her mind, why had she then retreated into the Hall, keeping Aubrey with her?

‘So,’ he said, puzzled, ‘you don’t have any objection to Agnes and I living together?’

‘What is there to object to?’ Silas asked sadly.

‘Of course, I was quite outraged when I first found out about the situation. But things changed. Over the course of my afterlife, these rules and regulations hardly seem to matter any more. If God doesn’t care enough about me to call me to His side, why should I care about obeying Him? That’s if He even exists.’

‘Reverend!’

‘Don’t sound so shocked, Wyndham. It must surely have crossed your mind, too?

I find myself growing less and less convinced of that fact with every passing year that I remain here.

When it comes right down to it, what does any of it matter?

Not,’ he added sternly, ‘that I approve of women vicars. That’s simply a step too far. ’

He got up and wandered over to the Christmas tree, examining it in silence for a few moments. Aubrey watched him, not entirely sure what to make of this entire conversation.

‘And when Agnes told me your living arrangements – well, there was nothing else to say, really. It was all a terrible letdown.’

Silas nodded sadly at the tree then turned back to Aubrey. ‘So you see, there’s no need to hide away in the Hall on my account. I really don’t care one way or the other what you do.’

‘And you’ll stop hurling insults at us, or telling the other ghosts that we’re committing some dreadful sin?’

‘Oh, come now. Allow me some pleasure.’

‘Reverend Alexander!’

‘Oh, all right! But really, you ask a lot of me. I suppose I’ll have to find someone else to insult now.

Trouble is, everyone seems to find me amusing.

Or they ignore me. I can’t get a good argument out of any of them these days, and it’s all so dreadfully tedious, don’t you think?

Eternity is a long, long time. What on earth shall we do with ourselves, Wyndham? ’

Aubrey joined him by the tree. ‘How about making friends?’ he suggested kindly.

‘Being with Agnes and Florence, chatting to Walter Tasker when he visits the Hall, the conversations I used to have with the other ghosts – all those things helped the time pass. As you say, eternity is a long, long time. We can’t spend it alone.

I should think anyone who tries to would go quite mad. ’

‘Perhaps,’ Silas said thoughtfully, ‘I have gone a little mad. I’ll mull over what you’ve suggested, though I have to say there are slim pickings in this place when it comes to intelligence or scintillating conversation.’

‘I’ve heard that Quintus Severus has moved into the village,’ Aubrey said. ‘You might find him interesting. I’m certainly hoping to seek him out and have a conversation with him. Now that I’ve chosen to come into Rowan Vale again, that is.’

‘Quite, quite. Of course, he’s a heathen so…’ Silas shrugged. ‘Then again, perhaps I am, too. Sad state of affairs, Wyndham. Sad state of affairs.’

Aubrey patted him on the shoulder and turned to leave. A few steps down the aisle, he paused and looked over his shoulder.

‘You know,’ he said, ‘if you ask me, the very fact that we are here now is proof of God, don’t you think?’

Silas raised an eyebrow. ‘How on earth do you make that out?’

‘Well, if there was no God, there’d be no afterlife, would there?’ Aubrey said. ‘And this may not be heaven, but it’s certainly not hell.’

‘Then what is it?’

Aubrey shrugged. ‘A waiting room of some sort perhaps? Somewhere we stay until we learn our final lessons before we can move on?’ He gazed up at the stone carvings and the beautiful stained-glass windows.

Everything in this church was, after all, a symbol of man’s faith in something greater than himself.

‘I really don’t know. But surely the fact that we’re here to question these things means there’s something bigger than you or me?

And for my own part, I choose to believe that something is God.

‘I may be wrong, of course, but it makes me happier to hold on to that belief than to let it go. I believe God is in each and every one of us, so maybe, Reverend, if you connect with other people, you’ll find Him again.

You’ve pushed Him away for long enough. Open your heart to the villagers, and you’ll let Him in once more. ’

‘But I feel forsaken,’ Silas said, a bleakness in his eyes. ‘We are in no man’s land. If there is a God, is He really likely to find us here?’

‘He’ll find us wherever we are,’ Aubrey assured him. ‘He’s our God, too. Merry Christmas, Silas.’

He nodded a farewell and headed down the aisle. He’d reached the door before Silas responded.

‘Yes, yes. Merry Christmas,’ he called, sounding distracted. Then, a welcome hint of mischief in his voice, ‘And a merry Christmas to that firecracker of yours.’

Aubrey shook his head. ‘Really, do show some respect. That’s my wife you’re talking about.’

As he pushed open the church door, Silas called to him one last jibe.

‘Not in the eyes of God, she isn’t! Don’t you forget that, Wyndham! No shenanigans. Do you hear me? No shenanigans!’

Smiling to himself, Aubrey left the church – and the wayward vicar – behind.