Page 18

Lisa

Day 13

T he next morning, I wake up feeling calm. For the first time in days, the gloom from the past two weeks does not hang as heavily over my head. Juk is nestled at my side, his warm arms around me. He lightly strokes his fingers through my hair, the only indication he is awake. The fire crackles nearby, the smell of meat cooking beside it.

I lie still, pretending to be asleep. Juk’s hand in my hair hesitates, as though he can sense the shift in my breathing. I am not ready to wake up and see the others watching us. Our close bodies, the gossip it will insight. OK, it’s not everybody I want to avoid, just Evie. I can just picture the smug look on her face, and it’s not something I want to endure right now. Not when the main priority is still retrieving the others.

But I think of Juk’s kiss last night, the perfect way his mouth fit mine. The coolness of his tongue, so opposite to the warmth from his body, and the tingling sensation it left down my throat. I wonder if other parts of him are warm or cold, if swallowing him would leave the same tingling sensation...

I squirm at the thought, heat pooling between my legs as my core throbs. One kiss and now all I can think about are blowjobs. Focus, Lisa. There are seven women depending on you.

Juk shifts as I squirm. It doesn’t help because now I can feel something long, hard and throbbing against my leg. Warm on the outside but maybe cool on the inside?

There must be astrostingents in the air making me this horny.

“I need to go confer with the alpha,” Juk murmurs into my ear. “There is tea stewing over the fire, and some smoked meat set aside for you. The others have been awake for a while, but we will need to get moving soon if we wish to make good time today.”

I nod against his chest. He shifts against me, the feel of his cock against my leg disappearing as he stands up. Either he’s walking around unashamed with it tenting, or the Celetans can control their urges like a switch.

It takes me a few more minutes to calm myself. I think of Allison, Gabby, Chelsea and Vivianna. We’ve been stranded on his planet for nearly two weeks now. Two weeks of nothing but endless snow and cold. The three of us barely survived in the bridge. We had mild heat and rations, and an overflowing latrine, but it was something. A shield across the door to protect us. I can’t imagine how the seven in the cargo hold are faring.

It sobers me up quickly. The heat rushes from my body, replaced with cold determination. We are almost at the location on the map. Almost at the border of the two pack territories.

I sit up and watch as Juk leaves the cave. His good tail swishes back and forth, but the sight of his limp one cracks my heart. This has not been an easy journey. Nothing about the last two weeks has been easy. But it has to get better at some point. And maybe, as I take one last glance at the tall teal piece of meat disappearing through the cave’s opening, I already have one thing that will help make it easier. I can see the path it will lead to, and it helps ease some of the trauma away.

It’s going to get harder before it gets easier . The thought rings through my head as I stand, and stretch. I settle by the fire and help myself to a stone cup of tea. It’s earthy and bitter, but the warmth of it seeps through my body, steeling my determination. Whatever awaits us at the territory’s border will be the last hard step towards moving forward, moving on to whatever life awaits us here, with the Snowscape Pack. With Juk.

Evie quietly sits down next to me, her own steaming cup of tea in her hands. There’s a glow about her that I see now in a different light. Not one of envy, but of hope. Hope that one day I, too, can be at peace with what has happened to us, to the new life we’ll start here.

I clear my throat just as Evie starts, “Things have been tense between us—”

We both pause and I wave at her to continue as I reach for one of the pieces of smoked meat waiting near the fire.

“It’s been a difficult few weeks,” Evie starts again. “For all of us. Part of me forgets that your group was only on the ship for three days before it crashed. That you all still held hope of being rescued or escaping. I’d been there two weeks already, resigned to... whatever the Skulchers had planned.”

A knot forms in my throat. That’s right. Maybe Evie accepted sanctuary on this planet so easily because she’d been gone from home for so long. “It’s all still very fresh feeling,” I say at last.

Evie nods. “And that’s ok. Nobody is asking you to pick out a cave and live happily ever after. It’ll take a long time, for all of us, to move on. To grieve our old lives, the people we left behind, and to make peace here. Finding comfort—love—with Axyll... it doesn’t mean I’ve forgotten about the others. About the seven women we’ve been spearheading towards, about Briley and Meg lost out there on their own. I worry about them all constantly—especially Jade. Of all the kidnapped women on the ship, before your group arrived, she was the most fragile.”

She pauses, closing her eyes as though she can imagine the mangled cargo hold, or whatever horrors we might encounter in the next day or two. “I know it seems weird to find love in this situation. Love seems to find the worst circumstances to expose itself. But at least now I feel safe. That’s the main comfort it brings right now. We can explore where it will take us later, once things have settled. Because despite what you might think, finding the others is my top priority too. Axyll is determined to find the other women and bring them to safety. Regardless if they’re in Stygian territory, he sees them as part of our pack—the Human Pack—which he has deemed now part of the Snowscape Pack. We won’t rest until we find everybody... or give them a proper burial.”

The knot starts to tighten in my throat and I glance towards the cave entrance. I can see a part of Juk’s back, and a different blue arm moving in front of him. The Celetans talking about the day’s plans.

“It just feels so... wrong ,” I admit at last, turning to her. Her big brown eyes are earnest, her face soft. There is none of the hostility I know I have been throwing her way the past few days, and the guilt starts to leech inside, mingling with the knot in my throat. “To have all these feelings so suddenly when there are many more important things to be focusing on...”

“Nobody can help the way they feel,” Evie says. “And those feelings aren’t getting in the way of focusing on finding the others.”

“I’m just skeptical, I guess,” I confess. “Both of us suddenly finding... whatever this is. Mates, by their words. Is it real or is it just something in the air? A pheromone or chemical natural to the planet, forcing us to be together. Have you ever been around a Cloktyl when they’re in heat? Once they release those pheromones, anyone nearby is helpless against the lust...”

Evie laughs. “No, I’ve thankfully never been around a Cloktyl, but I’ve heard about them.” She then tilts her head thoughtfully, and glances at the cave’s entrance toward the Celetans. “Even if it is one of the astrostingents in the air that computer picked up on... does it matter?”

Before I can answer, she continues, thinking aloud. “It’s not like Axyll and I need to stop and have sex every hour. We’re not out of control in lust, needing to mate all the time. It feels like any healthy relationship should, just... deeper. Righter than any other relationship I’ve ever had.” She shrugs and looks back at me, smiling. “I can’t explain it more than that, but I think you probably know what I mean. Or you will, if you let yourself. And if it were some pheromone thing, we’d all have been affected by now. Wouldn’t we be in orgies? Or wouldn’t you be lusting after everyone instead of just Juk?”

She has a point. The only one I have growing feelings for is Juk. And Evie and Axyll are clearly only attached to each other. Yet I sigh and chew my bottom lip. “But what are the chances of the two of us finding ‘mates?’ They think it’s their moon pairing us off.”

Evie shrugs as she stands. She downs the rest of her tea and licks her lips. “And what if it is?”

My eyebrow arches, and I can’t help but smirk. “You and I both know those are nothing but two moons in their planet’s orbit. There’s nothing magic or mystical about them.”

Again, Evie shrugs. “Who’s to say for sure? There are many mysteries out there in the universe. And not all of them can be explained. Sometimes, you just need to believe.”

Soon we’re off on another grueling haul through the snow. The sun hides behind clouds for most of the day, the chill biting through my suit. Kalpa pulls the large sled, now our only option to carry supplies.

My legs ache riding on Juk’s back. By the time we settle into the shelter for the night, I am exhausted. I’ve done a thirty-six hour shift before in the mines, but somehow this was harder. It takes all my energy to sit up right in front of the fire and eat dinner before I collapse in Juk’s arms for the night.

In the morning, it’s another long day. Tabros runs ahead as scout. Axyll runs close behind, Evie on his back. Juk and I are close behind.

I feel miniscule on his broad back. He’s wider than the sled. With every movement of his legs, paws barely touching the snow before moving onto the next step, I can feel his muscles work underneath me.

It’s not long before my legs are sore from riding. I don’t know how Evie got used to this so quickly, but I feel like a duck out of water as I grip his stark white fur with my gloved hands, praying I don’t lose balance.

There is something intimate about riding on his back. And something badass. I feel like we’re charging into war, and can’t help but feel a sense of pride as I glance at the other wolves and marvel at how large Juk is compared to them. I guess I’m the warrior princess now. It’s oddly a nice feeling.

Tabros howls ahead, and Axyll starts to slow. Juk and the others follow his lead. Baz runs ahead, another barrier between potential danger and the alpha and his mate.

I glance towards the sky. It’s hard to decipher the time with the sun hidden, but I think we’ve only been running for half the day. There’s no way we’d be there already. Juk said it was another two days still. Maybe one if we hurry, but there is still at least one night in a cave before we arrive at the border and crash site.

My thighs grip Juk’s broad form as I think about tonight. Another night together in the cave, though perhaps with less hesitation. I find I almost anticipate curling up with him next to the fire, wolf or human form. My hand absently strokes his fur at the thought of it, and his large head glances over his shoulder at me.

That third eye finds me immediately, watching me in that soul-searching way.

Tabros lets out another howl, and Juk nods his head towards something in front of us. My attention snaps up at once, my heart racing.

At first I don’t see anything. Tabros and Baz are in the near distance, their white forms barely discernable through the snow. The clouds have completely overcome the sun, and I squint, trying to peer past Evie’s form as she and Axyll creep closer to the waiting Celetans.

It’s when Evie slips off Axyll’s back that I see it. My body stiffens at once, all thoughts of Juk lost.

Stark against the white of the snow is a streak of black. At first it looks like a piece of rock jutting out from the snow, but I know the Celetans would not stop for a mere piece of terrain. This is part of the ship.

I practically leap off Juk’s back as I catch up to Evie. She kneels in the snow, her hands working fast to brush the snow aside.

I slide in next to her, my knees digging into the snow. My hands shake as I push the snow off the sleek black metal. The Celetans start to sniff around it, digging with their enormous paws. Juk’s third eye stays on me the entire time as he moves up to the top corner.

“Has it been snowing enough that it would be this buried?” Evie asks, her voice laced with panic as she continues to brush off snow.

“It has been two weeks since we crashed,” I remind her. My heartbeat roars in my ears, a beat to the anxiety running through me. They’re still alive, they’re still alive. It can’t have ended like this for them.

“Shit,” Evie whispers and she starts to dig faster. “Has it been that long already?”

I sit back on my heels as my fingers grip the lip of the metal. It’s about two inches thick and jarred on the bottom.

“Juk!” I call, and he’s next to me immediately. He nuzzles me, that third eye watching intently, and he sniffs around me, in a way I know he can’t help himself. “I’m fine, but I need you to lift this up.”

His muzzle moves from my face to the sheet of metal in the snow. A low, grizzly huff sounds from his throat, and Baz is next to him, the command foreign to me. Maybe one day I’ll learn to decipher the different types of gruffs and barks they make. He makes.

The two wolves dig under the exposed lip. It does not take them long with their large paws. Juk edges his nose under one side of the corner, and Baz the other. Between the two of them, they lift up the piece of metal.

At first it takes some effort, but as the remaining snow falls off to one side, the sheet lifts easily.

Just as I suspected, it’s not the cargo hold. Evie and the others stop digging.

Baz lets the piece of metal drop back into the snow.

“It’s just a piece of siding,” Evie says, breathless. One of the farther corners is curled up, and there is a long gash down one side.

I stare at the sheet of metal. Though it’s heavy because of its size, it’s a filmy piece of shit. A wave of anger rises in me, a tide I cannot stop, and I kick the thing.

“No wonder the damn ship broke apart. This is garbage!” I shout. The faces of my missing crew members flash before me, as well as those of the other three women. If this piece of siding ripped off so easily, I can only imagine what was left of the cargo hold once it hit the surface.

“At least it’s just a piece,” Evie says slowly. I know she is rationalizing the situation to herself. It’s her coping mechanism. “And this shows we’re going in the right direction.”

Axyll nods his head. He’s the size of a pony, his eyes level with Evie as she stands again. She pats his head absentmindedly, and he nuzzles into her neck.

“We’ll be there soon,” she says, looking over at me.

Juk walks over. He towers over me still, even in wolf form. His eyes search mine. I take a deep breath, willing the wave of anger to subside.

Juk lowers his head to me, and I press my forehead against his. The third eye closes, and a calm washes over me. His fur is soft against my forehead. A breath huffs in my face, a silent question.

“Let’s keep going.”