Page 25 of Cartel Viper (The Cartel Brotherhood #2)

Chapter Thirteen

Javier

What the fuck did I just listen to?

I’m staring at the phone in my hand, unable to bring myself to look at Maddy until I’m certain I won’t lose my ever-loving shit.

I’m equally pissed at both Drew and Maddy.

Drew for mistreating Maddy, and Maddy for hiding her boyfriend’s—motherfucking ex-boyfriend’s—mob connections.

How on earth could she have kept this from me? It all makes sense, but what the fuck?

“Javi?”

Usually, I’d feel badly about how timid she sounds, but today isn’t the day for me to dredge up any sympathy. At least not yet. This is too incredible, and not in a good way. I inhale three deep breaths before I lift my head and meet her gaze.

Now, I feel horrible because of how terrified she appears. I don’t think she’s faking it. Her hunched shoulders, wrapped arms, and trembling might be from Drew’s threats and my obvious outrage, or perhaps it’s simply my presence.

This isn’t what I want, even if I’m angry at her.

I twist and toss the burner phone on the bed before I open my arms to her. She steps into my embrace but doesn’t unwrap her arms to return my hug. Instead, she stands there, shaking like a leaf.

“Maddy, you know secrets aren’t an option anymore. You must tell me what’s going on.”

She nods but says nothing.

“I can’t protect you if I don’t know everything from start to finish.”

“I know, Javi.”

Silence lingers between us for so long I wonder if I’m going to have to command her to tell me what’s going on. Just as I’m ready to put my hands on her arms and press her back, she leans away from me, and our gazes meet.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you the truth.

I’m sorry I got you into the middle of this.

I’m sorry those two words aren’t nearly enough to make up for what’s already happened and what inevitably will happen.

All I can say is this is why I tried to keep my distance from everyone.

Getting involved with the O’Sheehans never ends well. ”

“You’ve been with Drew for a while.”

“I was with Drew, not have been. I’m not with him anymore.”

She snaps her mouth shut, and I know she’s unsure whether to say she’s with me.

My gut screams, “of course she is,” but this isn’t just about me.

It’s my entire family she’s brought into this mess.

There’s no way it won’t roll downhill and wind up in my family’s lap.

There’s no way I can deal with this alone.

Inevitably, it’ll draw them all in. It makes me want to scrub my hands over my face, but I withstand the temptation.

“I met Drew at the hospital where I was a midwife because his sister had her baby there. I helped deliver the little boy. It took me a while before I agreed to go on our first date. He was persistent but charming. It never felt like too much. He seemed interested, but my new job had crazy hours, so dating didn’t feel possible.

It wasn’t exactly that he wore me down because I liked him, so I found ways to make it work.

For the first two years we were together, I had no idea who and what he was. He kept it all from me.”

She pauses, and I sense she’s trying to gauge whether I believe her. I nod, and she flashes me a half-hearted smile.

“Two years ago, he fully embraced his role as boss. It was just before we moved in together. I’m still amazed he pulled off hiding everything from me.

Rather than break up with me, and I suppose risk me telling people I’d been with a mob boss, he just tightened his hold on me literally and figuratively.

He became insanely possessive and began to hurt me.

He’d always had a nasty streak to him when we argued, but it wasn’t enough to make it unbearable.

He’d say things to be hurtful, but it got far worse once I found out who he was.

The things he said and the things he did.

It was about two months into me fully knowing what was going on that he pressured me to help him.

It began with little things like patching up his guys when they got injured.

Then it was having me come on some of his missions in case the guys got hurt. ”

“He what? He had you go on missions with him?”

Incredulous. That’s the only way to describe how I feel hearing that.

“Yeah, I was always a couple blocks away, but I was there. I didn’t argue with him because it just didn’t feel worth it.

The consequences were too many bruises or threats.

He wound up controlling all of my life, or at least he thought so.

He thought he controlled who I saw, who I called, where I went, and how I spent my money.

He doesn’t know I took on some extra jobs here and there and sold my art, but I also skimmed off the top. ”

When she says that last bit, I think I finally found what can make my jaw truly hit the floor.

“Skimmed off the top of what, Maddy?”

“Off the deals he made me do.”

“You better explain exactly what you mean by that because right now my mind’s going to the worst possible scenario.”

“He didn’t whore me out or anything like that, but I spent a lot of time going back and forth between Albany, Rochester, Buffalo, and Ontario.”

I let that sink in, not because I don’t understand, just the opposite.

“He made you a drug mule?”

She’s pulling a “me” right now. Just like I’ll go silent when she asks questions I can’t or won’t answer, she’s doing the same thing to me. But her silence tells me everything I need to know.

“Maddy, why? Why did you stay with him for so long? You could’ve told Maks. You could’ve told Tío Enrique. You could’ve told your parents. You could’ve even told the O’Rourkes. You had so many options. Why?”

She grits her teeth and clenches her fists.

“I take it you’ve never been the victim of domestic violence, have you? Why does any woman stay in a situation like that? It sure as fuck wasn’t because I thought I could change him.”

“You really believed there was no way out?”

“If you’d seen what he did to me the couple of times I tried to leave, or he thought I was telling Laura something, you’d understand.

I didn’t believe I’d survive the time it took for Maks and his family to get to me if he found out.

But it finally got too unbearable, so I risked dying.

That would have been better than staying. ”

I cup her jaw and brush my thumb over her cheekbone. I do it often because it soothes me.

“ Chiquita , if only I’d known.”

“I know that, Javi. I’m certain everybody in my life will say that when they find out.” She looks toward the window, her voice distant, her mind obviously far away. “But it just wasn’t as simple as walking away.”

I let the silence envelop us; this time in no rush for her to continue.

I’m happy to give her time to process everything.

I take her hand and lead her over to the bed.

We both kick off our shoes before climbing on.

I sit propped against the headboard and lift her onto my lap.

She sits sideways at first, but then doesn’t like it, moving to straddle me, making it easier for us to see each other.

“Javi, I have a lot of his money tucked away. Far more than I’m certain he suspects. But I also hid more than half of his last shipment that he wanted me to run across the border.”

“Do you use it?” I don’t want to ask that question, so the words are slow to come out.

“No, never. I’m a nurse. I know what that shit does to you. I kept it as security. It’s hidden somewhere he’ll never find.”

“Maddy, you need to tell me exactly where it is.”

She bites her bottom lip, and I know she wants to shake her head. I don’t think it’s because she doesn’t trust me enough. I think she fears how I’ll react.

“Little one, I can’t help you if I don’t know.”

She takes a deep inhale, and I watch her chest cave as she exhales.

“I promise you it’s the one place none of them would think to look. You’re going to believe I’m the worst kind of person for this. But it was the only place I felt certain was safe.”

I want to tell her to hurry up and spit it out, but I’m not interrogating some guy I’m getting bored with and just want to kill to be done with it. This is my terrified girlfriend.

“You’re going to think I’m the worst kind of Catholic.”

All I do is cock an eyebrow to that, considering I’m about as lapsed a Catholic as there can be.

All the members of the Four Families have complicated relationships with God and their faiths.

Three families are Roman Catholic, and one’s East Orthodox.

We all grew up being altar servers as kids.

I sang in the children’s choir at my church in Bogotá.

But it’s difficult to do the things we do and believe confession is enough for absolution when we know we’re going to commit the same sins repeatedly. Willingly.

“He thought I wasn’t back yet after my last run.

So, one night, I visited the cemetery where they buried his grandparents.

They cremated his maternal ones, so they’re in a mausoleum, but his paternal ones have plots next to each other.

It was almost too dark to see what I was doing, but I made it work. ”

From the way she watches me, I know she wants me to deduce what she means rather than having to confess it.

“You buried his drugs with his grandparents.”

She bites her bottom lip again before she raises her gaze to meet mine. Her shoulders go back, and her chin comes up.

“I did.” The note of defiance in her voice is a tremendous relief.

“Good. You’re right. That’s the last place they would think to look.”

“You don’t think I’ll burn in hell for disrupting someone’s eternal resting place?”

“No. His grandmother wasn’t too bad, but his grandfather was a piece of shit. A complete douche. It’s not surprising Drew turned out the way he did.”

“Did you know his grandfather?”