Page 8 of By Rude Strength

It was…

Amonster.

It was so big that it had to hunch so its curling horns wouldn’t hit the ceiling. It was covered in thick brown fur and had a mouthful of sharp teeth with long canines. Its paws were massive, its claws even more so, and its legs were cocked at an odd angle like they’d been put on backward. It had a long tail scaled in thick golden plates, giant wings like a bat, and… and…

Wow.

Okay, the monster was sort of hot.

In a weird, furryBeauty and the Beastkinda way.

The cartoon though—not the live action one.

The monster’s eyes were the same shimmering shade of gold as its tail and wings, and its toothy grin was somehow cute while also being completely terrifying. It raised a paw and waved, saying in a low, rumbling voice, “Hey there!”

LA screamed.

The monster screamed.

LA wheezed and hit the floor.

Chapter two

“—Hello? Are you allright?”

“Huh?” LA’s eyes fluttered open, and he found himself being cradled in the arms of the monster.

Well.

So much for imagining it.

“Holy shit.” LA stared. “You’re… You’re real. You’rereallyreal.”

The monster stared back. “Are you going to scream at me again? Because I’d really prefer it if you didn’t—”

“Why the fuck didyouscream?”

“You scared me!” The monster pouted.

“Oh fuck off! What the fuck is going on?” LA pushed his way out of the monster’s arms. He kept gawking, even tried rubbing his eyes, but the monster remained standing right there with a very cute if not slightly concerned pout. “Whatthe fuck are you?”

“Wow, definitely not as rude as you.” The monster snorted. “Hi, my name is Cass. It’s nice to be summoned by you.”

“Summoned?” LA looked at the shopping bag on the table and his mind tried to connect the pieces. “The bottle. You were in the bottle? But I didn’t rub it!”

“Uh, no, not without dinner first,” Cass teased.

“Thefuckingfuck?”

“I camethroughthe bottle, Mr. Rudeness. No rubbing required.”

“What…?What?” LA couldn’t form any other words, staggering to the couch to flop down with a hiss of pain. He took a deep breath, his spine burning as he fought to get his brain to cooperate, and grunted out, “What kind of monster comes through a fuckin’ bottle?”

“Technically, I’m an imp.” Cass sat on the other end of the couch. “If you’re trying to ask me what I am. I think that’s what you mean anyway. Hard to tell with all the cursing if you’re being serious or just a jerk.”

“Animp?” LA scoffed. “Aren’t you kinda big for an imp?”

“Oh! Do you know a lot of imps?” Cass batted his eyes.