Page 29 of By Rude Strength

“Hi.” LA forced a smile into his voice. “My name is Lawrence Holmes, calling about a 2006 Chevy Cobalt that got picked up yesterday. No one called me to let me know what was going on. Can it be patched or—”

“Last name?”

“Holmes.”

“And, and the car?”

“A 2006 Chevy Cobalt.”

“I’m… I’m sorry, sir.” Anna’s voice hit a higher pitch. “I, I don’t have any records matching your name or, or that car.”

LA gritted his teeth. “Try again.”

“Excuse me, sir?”

“I said,try again. I just got off the phone with roadside assistance and I couldn’t get a real person to talk to, but Smeebert whatever Towing is the name they gave me in the automated text they sent out. I dialed that number, got you, and here we are, having this delightful real person conversation.”

“Uh…”

“Yes?”

“C-can you spell your last name?”

“Holmes. H-O-L-M-E-S.” LA braced himself for the inevitable Sherlock reference.

“Oh! Like the serial killer.”

“Sure. Yup.” LA snorted.

“Yes, okay!” Anna sighed in relief. “I am so sorry for the confusion, sir, but yes, your car is here. We have it. They, they couldn’t, we couldn’t get a hold of you to confirm repairs so—”

“Repairs? What repairs?”

“The tire? If, if you wanted it patched or—”

“Can it be patched?”

“Yes, sir. It should only take us about thirty minutes and it’ll be twenty-nine—”

“That’s fine.”

“Or, or for a new tire it would be—”

“Bye.” LA hung up abruptly and pulled himself back to his feet. He shooed at Cass. “You. Get out.”

“That phone call sounded promising?” Cass didn’t budge. “They have located your vehicle and will make the repairs?”

“Yeah, it’s just a patch. It should be ready in half an hour which means I need to get ready.” LA waved his hands again. “Which means you get out unless you wanna see me change clothes.”

“Oh.Oh!” Cass sputtered for a few moments and then scurried out of the room, babbling away until the door shut, “Sorry! I’m so sorry! I don’t wish to! I don’t not wish to, that is, but not like this, and, and shutting up because—” He kept going, though it was muffled. “Goodness, I am just going to stop talking. Yup. Any second now. Stopping…”

LA snorted to himself.

Wait.

Did Cass say that he didn’tnotwant to? Which was a double negative, which meant…

LA must have misheard him.