Page 93 of Burning Ember

The club and Cap come first. That’s how it’s always been. That’s how it needs to be. But I’ll be damned if I don’t want to send Dozer and Taz in my place so I can stay here and make things right with Doll.

A few minutes later, my attention is glued to her gorgeous body as she juggles the ball down the field. Bodie’s little boy is latched on to her hand as they try to kick the ball past the other kids into their makeshift goal. She’s laughing and a trail of scarlet flies out behind her. She’s smiling wide, and every few seconds she has to tuck that wild mane of hers behind her ear to keep it out of her face.

I’ve never seen her like this.

So free in every way. Free to laugh. Free to play. Free to be herself.

Does she need freedom to show this side of herself? The exact thing I’ve been denying her. Would I see her like this more often if I backed off? Because I want to, I want to see the girl she hides away from us all. I want to see who she really is. What she looks like in her own clothes and in an environment she feels comfortable in. Above all, I want to know her real name and what she thinks about in that little head of hers.

I’ve tried to break her, but she’s stayed strong. I’ve tried to push her away, but she won’t go. I hope to hell that it stays that way. I want time to fix what I’ve damaged.

But ultimately, the decision is in her hands, and I can only hope that when I return, she’ll be here.

Bodie’s son gets kicked pretty hard by one of the other kids. His high-pitched wail pierces the air as he falls to the ground clutching his knee. Doll drops to her knees beside him.

I pocket my phone and head over because I know Blaire’s inside cleaning up, and Bodie’s nowhere to be seen. I wave off Kendra and the other adults who step away from the table to check on him, letting them know I’ll handle it.

As I near Tucker and Doll, I hear her say, “Shh . . . it’s okay. It’s just a scratch, see?”

Tucker, who’s as blond as his mama, sobs between sniffles. “Do you have a Band-Aid?”Sniff. “I willy need a Band-Aid.”

Doll spares me a glance when I stop beside her. She has her hand up shielding her eyes from the sun as she peers up at me. “The first aid kit’s in Dozer’s room,” she says. What she doesn’t say rings in the air around us.It’s in Dozer’s room because you attacked me, cut me, and I had to be patched up.

Not sure I’ve ever felt like more of an asshole than I do right now.

She moves to stand, but I wave her off too. “I’ll go get it. You stay. Try to calm him down.”

It doesn’t take me long to get the first aid kit and get back to her. By then Tucker has stopped crying. He’s eating a cookie and sniffling every few seconds.

Doll applies the Band-Aid while Tucker tells her with a mouth full of cookie that he has Batman and Hello Kitty Band-Aids, better Band-Aids at his house. She should come over so he can show them to her. But he makes sure to tell her he doesn’t let his mom put the Hello Kitty ones on him. Those are for girls. Doll listens intently. Laughs, and gives animated responses that have Tucker smiling again in no time.

He gets to his feet. As if he’s just noticed I’m standing here, he looks up at me. I hold out my knuckles for him to bump. “Gettin’ strong like your old man.”

Tucker beams. “It’s cuz we wift weights together.” He holds his arm up and flexes. “See.”

I squeeze his arm and widen my eyes. “Whoa. You better put those muscles away before all the girls see and try to kiss you.”

His arm instantly drops. He scrunches up his nose. “Ew. Gross.”

I look over at Doll. “‘Gross,’ he says.”

“He’s four,” she replies, like that answers everything.

Nick walks up beside me. “Everything all right?”

“Yeah, looks like Doll’s got it taken care of.”

Her lips twist with amusement, “Doll. I thought it was Pumpkin?”

Doll brushes off her knees and stands. “Whichever. I go by so many names I can’t keep them straight.” She reaches forward and offers her hand to Nick. “You must be Nick, Dozer’s mom. It’s good to meet you.”

“Aww and she’s polite. You can call me Nick, or Locks. I’ll answer to either.” Nick winks at me. I hold my breath waiting for it. The snarky bitch to come out, but I’m surprised when Nick reaches forward and shakes Doll’s hand. “Nice to meet you, too.”

Wait what?What is she doing?

“Thanks for the food. It was the last thing I wanted to worry about today. And I’m gettin’ sick of pizza.”

Doll nods. “Oh . . . yeah. Sure.” She says it as if she forgot all about baking for the army of people here today. “You’re welcome. Cooking’s kind of relaxing for me and I had a rough morning so I got a little carried away.”