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CHAPTER TWO

FALIN

My eyes are bleary as hell, but I’m stuck awake at 2 AM, staring at multiple screens while I track Jasper’s movement through a rough part of town. This damn man will be the death of me. Did he actually think he could sneak out to buy pills without my knowledge? He must be dumber than I thought.

At least I know he’s safe in that abandoned storefront—for now. As long as he doesn’t make any stupid moves, everything will work out fine. Well, except me missing out on much needed sleep.

My phone buzzes from its spot on my desk and I roll my eyes, already sure he’ll have some ridiculous comeback for my last burn. What pops up on the screen is entirely unexpected. A photo of two scraggly kittens, small enough to fit in his massive palm. My heart melts for a moment before my brain catches up. Aww switches to oh no so fast it gives me whiplash. He’s going to bring them back here. To our apartment. Which is already housing five extremely different people despite it being slightly larger than a shoebox. Okay, maybe that’s an exaggeration. It has three closet-sized bedrooms. But the walls are so thin. Way too thin to be sleeping next to my best friend and her obsessive new boyfriend. Where the hell would we put two kittens who probably have a plethora of diseases and parasites?

The text comes through next.

Jasper: You can call me daddy now.

I snort in the most hideously unladylike manor. Not like I’ve ever been much of a lady anyway. Why do I have a soft spot for this buffoon? As I pick up my phone to reply, I get an alert on my screen. Jasper’s on the move. “Is he serious?” I ask out loud to no one at all. I told him to stay put. My palm itches to beat the ever-loving shit out of him—but then that thought has my face flushed and breath quickening. No. You will not get turned on at the thought of punishing Jasper Shea.

I check my screens, showing small images of nearby street light cameras. Making sure he’s not in imminent danger, I call him. It goes to voicemail on the first ring. “Oh, hell no.”

I press call again as my pulse picks up. Fucking voicemail for a second time. I push up from the creaky desk chair we bought at a flea market last week, and pace the three steps of my bedroom. The generic, please leave a message recording plays in my ear and I make a split second decision to give him a piece of my mind.

“Do you want to get arrested? Or maybe it’s a death wish, I can’t quite decide. Either way, you’re being stupid. I told you to stay put.” I heave an aggravated sigh and continue in a resigned tone. “If you absolutely have to head home, call me back so I can give you the best route. Oh, and the cats… good luck getting everyone to agree on keeping them.”

I hit end, feeling more frazzled than before I left the message. My muscles ache from being at my uncomfortable desk all day, my feet are ice cubes since the heat in this building is spotty if on at all, and I’m goddamn horny. Add on dealing with Jasper’s incompetence and I’m standing here questioning if leaving my job and life was the right decision.

My life there was put together. I had control of every aspect—where I lived, which projects I worked on, when I traveled, and most importantly, who I slept with.

Ah, the sex was beyond good. Always a new guy to make me come. Love ‘em and leave ‘em. Never get attached and I’d never be hurt or abandoned.

To have every modicum of control slip through my fingers the way it has been this past month has been difficult to say the least. My carefree mask has started to slip. Even Blake’s begun to notice the changes in my mood.

I try to call Jasper again while watching his dot on the screen move from block to block toward the nearest subway entrance. No answer, like I figured. I could go to bed. Force myself to not care. Yeah, right. That’s not who I am. If I was that person, I’d still be in San Francisco, sitting in my office overlooking the bay.

I’m here for Blake. She needs me. Plus, with my help, maybe we can finally find Jasper’s sister and my best friend can get her life back in order.

As the thought leaves my mind, the familiar sound of her bed frame knocking against my wall starts. Just like every other night since we moved here. I swear, I don’t think I’ve known anyone who fucks as much as those two do. I don’t know if I’m jealous, or concerned for her vagina.

And there goes the moaning.

“Christ on a cracker,” I groan. Phone in hand, I make my way to the small open concept kitchen and living area. I almost slam straight into Leon’s shirtless chest, jumping back a step in shock.

“Fuck, sorry I scared you.” He drags a hand over his tired eyes.

“Damon and Blake’s wake up call get you too?” I ask, shuffling past him to the fridge for a bottle of water.

He makes a sound that’s somewhere between a groan and a chuckle. “I don’t think I’ve slept a proper night in weeks.”

“Should we have a family intervention?” I joke, wiping my hand over my wet lips.

“You might be onto something,” he says with a smirk. Damn, he’s attractive. He has these smoldering hazel eyes that hide all his secrets. That lip ring too. He’s always nibbling it between his teeth. Something about a pierced guy gets me going.

I realize I’m staring up at him and blink, focusing my gaze at a discolored spot on the wall. “Remind me to never hang pictures in my room.”

“Oh yeah, that would be asking for broken glass everywhere.” He stretches his arms over his head, showing off his lean muscle. “Hey, I noticed Jasper’s gone. Is he in your room?”

I’m mid-sip when water almost spurts from my lips. “What? Why would you think that?” My voice drips with indignation.

Leon grabs me a paper towel from the counter, that smirk still visible. “Come on, I know you two are hooking up. It’s obvious.”

What the hell did Jasper tell him?

“We’re not hooking up. That man drives me insane. Plus, he’s not my type,” I lie. “I go for older guys… with their lives put together.”

Leon scratches his chin, scrutinizing me far too closely for my liking. “What about Blake’s birthday?”

Damn him. I knew he’d bring that up.

“That—That was—I—That had—Nothing. Nothing happened.” From the way I mangle my own words, any bullshit detector would know it’s a bold-faced lie.

Truth is, we made out that night. That’s it.

Well… okay, maybe there was some dry humping too. But I swear that’s where it stopped.

Thing is, only one of us actually remembers what happened—and it’s not the guy who was so wasted on pills and booze he could barely stand up straight.

I knew it was a mistake the second I woke up and saw him passed out on the floor beside me. If he wasn’t going to bring it up, neither was I. Lucky for me, he never said a word.

Leon, being the smug jerk that he is, only shakes his head and lets out a dry chuckle. I’m glad he thinks this situation is so funny. Before I have a chance to think of a witty retort to his mocking, we’re interrupted by an earthquake.

Not really… but holy hell it sounds like those two are going to break the floor. I clench my thighs together and take another sip of water.

“I’m surprised we haven’t gotten a write up from the building manager yet,” Leon says. He heads over to the couch, where his laptop sits folded on the coffee table.

“Oh, I think we have. Blake told me that Damon took care of it. Whatever that means.” I shrug and organize a few random objects on the kitchen counter. Not like I’m getting any sleep tonight. May as well straighten up.

“So if Jas isn’t in your room, any idea where he is?”

Leon has his phone out and is texting someone. Probably Jasper. The brightness on his screen is like a spotlight in the dim room.

“No idea,” I lie again. I’m not getting in the middle of Jasper’s addiction issue. If the guys haven’t seen what’s right in front of them, then they’re far less intuitive than I thought.

Looking at Leon’s expression, he seems to believe me… but there’s concern written all over his face. I’ve got a feeling he knows exactly what’s up. I sink into the other end of the couch, tucking my legs beneath me. Even with my thickest socks on, my toes feel like tiny icebergs.

Unease makes my chest constrict. There’s no use in calling Jasper again if he’s on the subway. But if I timed his route correctly, he should be getting home in a few minutes.

Leon and I sit there wordlessly, each lost in our own thoughts while our friend’s... enthusiastic noises… fill the silence. I’d bet any amount of money that he’s just as worried for Jasper as I am. Living here is going to give me premature aging. Crow’s feet before I’m even thirty. I better hit up Sephora for some new skin care.

Fifteen tense minutes crawl by before the front door knob rattles and Jasper’s unmistakable heavy steps have us both turning to look. An ache gnaws at my chest as I take in his disheveled state. His black balaclava is scrunched up on top of his head, with strands of his dirty blond hair poking through the bottom. He’s wearing a black hoodie, and baggy dark wash jeans—both covered in what looks like dust and dirt. There’s a dull pallor to his skin, despite being outside in the cold for the past hour. Even his ocean blue eyes are foggy, like the sea in a storm.

He notices us sitting there and suddenly the mask he wears for the world slips back into place. “Lee, what are you doing up?” He tilts his head, picking up the sounds from Blake and Damon’s room and laughs. “Oh. Right on time.”

“Where were you?” Leon asks, getting right to business.

My knee vibrates while I watch Jasper try to bullshit an excuse. Before he can open his mouth, the sound of mewling echoes through the apartment. Damn, I’d almost forgotten about the kittens.

“What the—” Leon scrunches his face as Jasper pulls the two scraggly kittens from his hoodie pocket.

“Shhh, babies. Daddy’s going to feed you,” Jasper says to the kittens, completely ignoring Leon’s question.

I break my gaze away from Jasper and turn to Leon. “You don’t even want to know.”

“You’re right. It’s too fucking late for this,” Leon says with a sigh before pushing up from the couch. He steps closer to Jasper, peering down at the kittens. “They’re not staying in our room.”

He holds a black kitten up so it’s eye level with Leon. “Don’t say that. Look at this face.”

“I’m going to bed.” In the dim light, I catch the ghost of a smile on Leon’s face as he heads back to his and Jasper’s room.

Jasper makes himself busy, pulling out a dish from the cabinet. I join him in the kitchen, wondering what the hell he’s planning on feeding two feral kittens at nearly 3 AM. I don’t have to wonder for long as he grabs a can of cat food from his hoodie pocket.

“Are you Mary fucking Poppins?” I ask. “What else do you have in that hoodie?”

“Nothing else in the hoodie, but I have something magical in my pants,” he says without missing a beat. I smack his arm, which only garners a smirk from him. He hands me the can. “Here, can you open this? My hands are full.”

“Yeah.” I guess I’m an accomplice to his cat crimes now. They are pathetically cute. Poor little things.

“One second guys, Mommy’s opening your num-nums,” he says in a baby voice that weirdly does it for me. Goddamn, I need to find a normal guy to fuck in this city.

“Please never say num-nums ever again. I think my ears are bleeding.” I grab a spoon and dish up the cat food onto a small plate while Jasper snickers. “Let’s bring them to my room.”

His brow raises. “I’m finally getting invited in, and all it took was some starving kittens.” He holds them up in one hand so they meet his eyes. “I knew I loved you two.”

“Come on, dummy. Let’s get them fed so I can yell at you for being stupid tonight.” I head toward my room, noticing that Blake and Damon finally seem to have quieted down. Once we’re both inside, I close the door.

In this tiny room, Jasper’s size is overwhelming. His presence seems to swallow up every inch of space, every breath of air. I shimmy around him and bend to put the dish on the floor, being acutely aware of just how teeny my sleep shorts are. Jasper gently places the kittens down in front of the dish and we sit on the edge of my bed, taking a moment to watch them go to town on the gross wet food.

“I think I’m going to name the black one Mayhem. May for short.” He leans back on his forearms, stretching his long legs out in front of him. “And the other one, maybe Chaos. That one’s a hellion, I can tell.”

I ignore the pang in my chest. “What the hell happened tonight?”

He bends at the waist to scratch the kitten on the head. “Or maybe Havoc. Yeah, I like that name.”

“I know what you’re doing,” I say, crossing my arms.

“I should go grab a washcloth. They’re filthy.” He hums to himself and starts to stand.

“Jasper.” I grab his bicep—or try to. The thing is massive.

He releases a long sigh and meets my gaze. His brows draw together and his face sags like it’s weighed down. “What do you want me to say?”

I’m acutely aware of every feeling coursing through him. He thinks he can hide from me, but he can’t. He can’t hide his trembling limbs, or how he worries his lip until it’s raw. I see his restlessness. The way his thoughts drift away when the cravings take hold.

As much as I want to berate him for being stupid, I know that’s not what he needs. “Take off your hoodie and lie back.”

The corner of his lip tips up and he tilts his head to take me in. “Oh, really? I didn’t think we were going there, but yes ma’am.”

I shove his arm playfully. “Shut up and do as I say.”

“Fuck, at least buy me dinner first.” He yanks his mask from the top of his head, tossing it on the floor, before pulling the dirty hoodie off. He’s left wearing nothing but a white cotton undershirt that clings to his pecs like a second skin.

And my mouth is suddenly dry as hell.

“Lie back and close your eyes. I’m going to do some acupressure points on you.”

I cross the room to hit the light switch as he repositions himself, laying his head on my pillow. The kittens have polished off their meal and my mind drifts to the fact that they’ll now have to use their non-existent litter box, but once I see Jasper finally listening to me, I ignore the thought.

His chest rises and falls slower already, a telltale sign that he’s starting to relax. I climb into bed beside him, scooting as close as I can so I don’t fall off the edge. Being this close, his masculine scent overwhelms me. Goddamn, why do I have to be so horny?

“Falin?” he whispers. “Should I sit up?”

“Such a good boy, asking for permission,” I joke. It gets a quiet laugh out of him. “No, stay just how you are.” I take hold of his hand and start with the point in the webbing between his thumb and index finger, exerting gentle pressure. “I lived in China last year. It was only a few months, but I learned a thing or two.”

“Oh yeah?” he mumbles. “Feels good.”

I can’t help but smile from his praise as I continue holding the point. “There’s a belief that we have a life force inside us called Chi. There’s points throughout the body where the Chi can get stuck, which leads to all kinds of uncool shit.”

As I move my hand down his wrist to the point on his inner forearm, he hitches a breath and trembles slightly. I spend about a minute, quietly holding the point before gently massaging in a circular motion. The skin on his arm breaks out in goosebumps.

“There’s one last point I want to get.” I look him over, trying to figure out the best way to reach the spot. There’s really only one way with him laying the way he is.

“Uh, huh,” he says, barely coherent. Without overthinking, I climb on top of his torso, my knees on either side of him. Of course, his head snaps up, eyes wide. “We doing this?”

“Shh,” I say, pushing his shoulders down. “That’s not what’s happening here. Just close your eyes again.”

“You expect me to relax with you straddling me?”

“I’ll stop,” I warn.

“No, don’t.” He sounds so desperate that warmth spreads through my chest… and other places… lower.

I press the point between his brows, trying my best not to press my tits into his face. But, fuck . I really want to press my tits into his face. His body is so damn perfect. Abs like a goddamn washboard. All I’d have to do is scoot down a bit.

No.

The kittens start crying, breaking me from my train of thought. Thank fucking God.

Jasper starts to sit up again, but I push him back down. “Rest. I’ll go see if we have a box and some old newspaper from the move.”

That’ll have to do for a makeshift litter box for now.

“You hear that, girls? Mommy’s taking care of you.”

I let out a soft scoff, tucking my chin to hide the traitorous smile tugging at my lips. Whatever fantasy world Jasper’s living in, it must be quite the vacation spot. I almost want to join him. It would sure beat our current reality.