Page 68 of Breaking the Ice

“It’s only right,” Gavin protested weakly.

“And somehow you’re one of the few who actually believe it. And follow through,” Zach said.

“I’m not some kind of hero,” Gavin argued.

“The fact that you don’t see it means you kinda are.” Zach hesitated. “I was so lucky before, when you were my coach. And I’m evenluckier now.”

Gavin didn’t want Zach’s hero worship. He wanted Zach to understand he was just a man, trying to do his best in an uncertain and unfair world.

“Me too, you know?” Gavin had said it before, and he didn’t think he needed to say it again.I wouldn’t want to do this without you.

There was a long quiet moment. Gavin could hear Zach breathing. Imagined he could hear the same. Not an awkward silence, but a comfortable one.

“I have to go work on a paper,” Zach finally said reluctantly.

And I have to go jerk off, thinking about you.

“Hope it goes well. See you tomorrow?” He might’ve suggested breakfast at the diner, but he didn’t know how he’d feel about seeing Zach first thing in the morning after . . .well,after.

He didn’t think he’d want to throw Zach down onto a tabletop at Jimmy’s and kiss him until it seemed like the most natural thing in the world, but you never knew.

Gavin was in uncharted waters these days.

“We should get breakfast,” Zach said.

Gavin should say no. He’d already decided it was a bad idea. But somehow he found himself saying, “Eight? I’ll see you then.”

Zach agreed and then said quietly, intensely, “Good night.”

The moment he tossed the phone down, Gavin knew he wasn’t going to make it to the bed.

He reached down and pressed at his cock, erect and aching.

It was easier than he’d thought it would be to unbutton and unzip and push his jeans down. He palmed himself in his boxers and gasped out loud. It was annoying how right Jon was,because he was desperate and gagging for it, twitching in his palm as he pushed his boxers down next.

It was even easier to turn his head and imagine that Zach was here. Comfort and heat in those soft blue eyes as they stared at him. Acceptance and desire, too.

It’s okay, he could hear Zach say.Do it. Let go. I want you to.

His cock was so wet at the tip he didn’t even need the lube in his drawer. He just slicked it down and let his mind keep wandering.

Zach there, still, eyes intent on him, on his body, on what his hand was doing. Then he reached over and didn’t even touch his dick, just put his palm, hot and steady, on his belly, right above where Gavin was stroking himself, and then slid lower, down to Gavin’s bare thigh. Squeezed.

God, you’re hot, Zach might say.I want you so much. I’ve been waiting for you to want me.

And Gavin wouldn’t hold back. He’d say,I’ve been wanting you too.He imagined leaning over and just letting his lips brush easily across Zach’s. No pressure. No angst. Just pleasure—the two of them floating through it so easy as the kiss deepened, Zach’s tongue brushing against his.

Zach murmuring against his mouth,let me. I want to.

Pleasure was burning in his stomach, mounting in his balls, and it would only take a little bit more to tip him over the edge. Zach’s fingers, tangling with his own, stroking him together, and Gavin shuddered, coming so hard it was a miracle he didn’t fucking pass out.

For a long moment, Gavin didn’t think, he justfelt.

How good it had been. How right.

The most natural thing in the world to want to cross that line, and then to justdoit.

It would seem almost innocent, except for the cooling stripes of come on his stomach.