chapter twenty-eight

Jillian

A few years ago, during a live interview with a woman who had over a hundred windchimes in her rural yard, the words “ I bet you caught a lot of hell for that! ” came out of my mouth before I could stop myself.

She’d just told me she started her windchime collection back when she lived in the suburbs, and her neighbors hadn’t exactly found it charming.

The expletive just slipped out, almost like I forgot it was a swear word altogether.

WWTV didn’t get fined. We didn’t even get a warning.

I recounted this story to Chase, who was spiraling a bit after the show ended. Marco was so peeved he locked himself in his office, and Graham had disappeared, too. That left Meghan and me to reassure Chase that he wasn’t getting fired and nobody hated him.

“The people love you,” Meghan said, scrolling through some online comments as we stood around the news desk. “In fact, someone said, ‘I would die for this awkward man.’” She glanced up. “Hope she can fight.”

That got a laugh out of Olivia, who was sitting close by, jotting something down in her pregnancy journal. It thrilled me so much to see her using it, I didn’t care that she was supposed to be emailing the library director about a story.

Meghan glanced over at her before shaking her head at me with a mock pout. “I’m having some intern envy right now. The mouth-breather they assigned to Xander and me isn’t as fun.”

“Really?” I raised an eyebrow at her. “Because it seems like you’re having a lot of fun torturing that kid.”

“Yeah, I guess,” she said with a sigh before pulling away from the news desk, looking at me. “Before we both get back to work, can we talk in private for a couple minutes?”

“Sure,” I said, sliding off my stool. It wasn’t unlike Meghan to want to take a walk outside to gush about Chase or complain about something going on with the newspaper.

However, when we stepped outside into the sunlight, Meghan didn’t start venting or gossiping. She stopped walking altogether and turned to me with a sneaky grin.

“When are you going to tell me about what’s going on between you and Graham?” she asked with her hands on her hips.

“What?” I laughed out, playing dumb.

She shook her head at me “Come on. I was standing right next to him when he ripped Marco a new one this morning. That wasn’t just a boss sticking up for his employee. It felt very… personal.”

“Oh.” I couldn’t keep pretending not to know what she was talking about. I held one hand up to my eyes to block out the sun. “If I tell you, you’re going to freak.”

“He already told me he cares about you, so it’s going to take a lot more than that to freak me out,” she said.

I stared at Meghan with a devilish look, thinking about all the ways I could completely gross her out with stories of my escapades with Graham.

I could’ve told her about the way he tied my wrists together, or how he told me exactly how he wanted me.

That’s what I would’ve done with any other man, sharing every last juicy detail without a care in the world.

But this was different.

My guilty grin faded, and Meghan studied my face closely, trying to read me. “Meghan,” I said, shaking my head like I was just about to drop the juiciest secret of my life. “I don’t know what to do. I haven’t fallen this hard for someone in a long, long time. Maybe… never.”

I worried she might respond with judgement or skepticism.

Graham was her mentor when she first started working for the paper, and just weeks ago, I was detailing the nasty sex I had with Xander, her closest co-worker.

She had to be sick of me by now. But if she was feeling disgusted by my confession, she didn’t let it show.

“Well,” she said, standing with her hands still on her hips. “This certainly changes the dynamics of our New York trip. This whole time, I had thought Graham would be the awkward fifth wheel, but now it looks like that’s going to be Xander.”

I held my hand over my stomach. “Shit, I hadn’t even thought of that.” The trip was in less than a week, and other than pre-recording segments for the network to air while I was gone, I hadn’t really given it much thought. “I won’t know how to act.”

Meghan was studying my face closely, almost like a worried mother. “Where is this going with him?”

“I have no idea.”

“Xander thinks they’re readying Graham to permanently take on the CEO role, as long as he doesn’t piss anyone else off. And if that happens…” Her voice trailed off, and her eyes softened.

“I know. I know, and it makes me feel like there’s a ticking time bomb on this relationship. At first, we were just having fun, but… Meghan, you should see the way he takes care of me.”

I didn’t like the way Meghan was suddenly smirking at me.

“What?”

“My bestie has a daddy kink.”

I tried to swat at her, but she laughed and ducked out of the way just in time. “Fun fact: he’s actually going to be a grandpa,” I said, pulling my hair to one side to get it off my neck.

“I know,” Meghan replied, shaking her head. “Your intern told Chase. Showed him her baby journal. Does that freak you out? You know, that he’s an old grandpa?”

I laughed. “Stop it! He’s only forty. And I’m turning thirty in a few days, mind you. It’s not like he’s robbing the cradle. Do you want me to describe in detail how limber he is?”

Her hands flew to her ears. “No, absolutely not! I don’t need the visual.”

“Why not? You tell me about all the weird places you and Chase get freaky, and now I have to look him in the eyes every morning. It’s only fair.”

Meghan groaned, her face turning red as she shook her head. “Okay, okay. Truce. No more visuals involving anyone over the age of thirty-nine. Or Chase in public places.”

I snorted. “Then what’s left?”

“You’re right, our conversations are going to get really boring,” she admitted.

We both laughed, and when it died down, she reached over and touched my arm.

“I am genuinely worried about you though, Jill. With everything you have going on, I’m afraid this is going to destroy you if it doesn’t work out. And it sounds like it… can’t.”

She wasn’t wrong.

This thing with Graham was never supposed to get serious. But somewhere, between all the late-night conversations, the sweet forehead kisses, and the way he talked to me when we were alone, things had shifted.

And if he got that permanent CEO position, things could get pretty messy. Maybe I needed to be the one to pull back a little before it turned into something I couldn’t walk away from without getting hurt.

Maybe it was already too late.

“Maybe I’ll quit,” I joked, with a sad kind of laugh. “That’d benefit literally everyone.”

Meghan scowled, and for a moment, I thought she might shove me—it wasn’t like she hadn’t before. “Don’t joke like that. Getting to work in the same building as you is the one of the coolest things that’s happened to me in a long time. Don’t you dare take that away from me.”

I blinked hard, feeling the slightest sting in my eyes. “I didn’t mean it,” I said, wondering how I got lucky enough to have a friend like her.

I also had the slightest inkling she was planning something for my birthday behind my back. Not only had she double-checked that I’d be at the Gardners’ on Friday, something that should have been a given, but Chase had also not-so-casually asked if I had fun plans for my birthday.

Now, why would my clueless new co-anchor know anything about my birthday?

Meghan let out a sigh, turning back toward the building.

The stickiness in the air clung to my skin, making the short walk back to the studio feel like a sauna.

“I guess we should go see if Marco’s emerged from his office yet,” Meghan said as we made our way inside.

“We don’t need him ripping into Chase without me there to defend him. ”

“You could say he learned that word from you,” I teased. It seemed my co-anchor and I had some pretty protective partners willing to fight our battles for us.

As much as I loved the protection, part of me wished I didn’t need it.