Page 6 of BounBound By Scars

I thought I knew what I was doing, choosing my words carefully enough to offer her a valid rebuttal. To let her process my words and give mesomethingto go on.

Admittedly, I was too chicken to rally on myself.

Her eyes narrowed in thought. “So, you’re saying we can’t be kissing around because I’m too important and curiosity would ruin ourfriendship?”

Wow. Kissing around, huh?

Before she could dive deeper into her argument, I cut in over the sound of my fucking heart shattering, “I like what we have, Lia. You ground me. Without you… there’s nothing.”

She nodded and loaded her metaphorical gun. I couldn’t have expected what was coming. In that moment I had given herenough words to challenge me. Something she never shied from. But she didn’twantto challenge me, did she?

“So, you wouldn’t mind if I started seeing someone else? Because, you know, given how close we are, I’d probably have to distance myself from you. That would hurt ourfriendshipmore.”

The word,‘friendship’, was suddenly grating on my last nerve.

Why is she saying that damn word like that?

Even though every other word from her was a gut punch enough, I tried to maintain my stance. “No, yeah. Date whoever you want. I’d even wingman you if you need me to.”

Why is my chest hurting?

The silence that followed was charged, heavy with all the things left unsaid and the ache of a phantom loss. This might just be the biggest mistake I was about to commit and my heart wasn’t even caught up.

But I believed we needed to do this. If this was just our six-year proximity resulting in her curiosity behind that kiss, then I didn’t want it. Didn’t need her scraps.

And just like that, her metaphorical gun, loaded with a metaphorical bullet, went straight through my heart as she spoke her next words.

“Okay!” She chirped too happily for my comfort. “Sebastian seems like a good guy. Maybe I’ll date him.”

There it was.

An option.

The last ditch effort pulverizing right in front of me. Any other day, I could read this woman like freaking java. But right now, I couldn’t make out a single twitch in her face. She was utterly nonchalant about this.

My heart was sinking further down, leaving the ache from before a distant moment because my chest was now about ready to fucking explode.

Was my face impassive?

Yes.

Did I want to yell and scream at her to fight me?

Also yes.

Did I do anything about it?

Nope.

My neck made a motion that was oddly close to nodding. Then I turned around and left her room without a single word.

THREE

Kabir

SebastianfuckingBlackthorn.

My next destination was the Blackthorn building across the bridge. The place where thehappy coupleslived. I fucking hated it.