Page 40 of BounBound By Scars

“Figure it out, okay? You deserve real. Not… confusion.”

She walked off, leaving me alone with my thoughts. The sun was still warm on my skin, but I suddenly felt cold.

Because she was right.

I couldn’t keep pretending.

Not when my heart already knew exactly where it wanted to be.

And it had never truly let Kabir out.

I needed to end things with Seb—whatever this thing between us even was.

Not because I thought I had a chance with Kabir.

But because Seb could never have a real chance with a heart that was already taken.

Groaning, I dragged a towel over my face and lay back on the lounge chair.

And promptly passed out.

Because emotional whiplash? Absolutely exhausting.

???

This was becoming a routine. Me, in Sebastian’s apartment every night—clearing out his alcohol and pretending we had some kind of deal to fake-date.

The dating part, though?

That ended tonight.

I was glad he was sober. I’d been patrolling his drinks since morning like a watchdog. He’d had my tea. At lunch, I’d harassed Chef Matthis into swapping his wine for juice. Dinner had gone the same way.

Still, my conversation with Leora lingered like a whisper at the back of my mind.

I must’ve been showing it on my face—my guilt, my decision—because Sebastian came to stand beside me as I dumped the last of his whiskey down the sink.

“You look troubled, sweetheart,” he said quietly.

I turned, offering him a sad smile.

He nodded before I could even say it. “You’re ending this, huh?”

I gave a half-hearted shrug. “It didn’t even really start, Seb.”

He cleared his throat and took a respectful step back. “I know it didn’t. But I also know how hard it must’ve been for you to even try dating someone who cared more about his next fix than—”

“Hey,” I cut him off gently. “That isnotwhy. We all have our shit. You’ve handled mine with so much grace, and I want to beveryclear—it’s not because of your addiction.”

He nodded again, though I wasn’t sure he believed me.

“Seb,” I stepped forward and rested a hand on his shoulder. “I can’t even pretend to date you—let alone actually date you—because I’d never be able to give you the part of me that’s belonged to someone else for a long, long time.”

He let out a breathy laugh. “Sounds poetic. Kabir’s a lucky bastard.”

I smiled, soft and apologetic. “I was being stupid, asking you to fake anything with me. I’ve never really dated before. And though that’s not an excuse… I wish I’d handled it all differently.”

His smile turned tight, but he didn’t pull away. “I know you love him. We were never going to work, not really. But I’m glad you were here the last few weeks.”